Chapter Twenty-Three

Ten Days Later – Andaman and Nicobar Islands

Lauren wondered if she would ever be able to drink enough to forget what had easily been the most humiliating night of her entire life – only to recall that too much alcohol had been the cause of said humiliation. She groaned again, as she had done every single time she’d thought of that awful night in New York two weeks ago – the one where she had made a fool out of herself in too many ways to count.

It had been bad enough that she’d actually gotten drunk – something she hadn’t done for a long, long time. She’d initially blamed her inebriation on mixing alcohol, which she rarely did, and on those damned pisco sours that had admittedly had a real kick to them.

But her humiliation hadn’t ended with her very public exhibition of drunkenness. It had continued – big time – when she’d come this close to seducing Ben in her aunt’s living room, practically stripping naked in the process.

And even that hadn’t been quite enough debasement for one night. Oh, no, then she’d had to go and upchuck rather brilliantly, suffering the added shame of Ben holding her hair back and then wiping her face off. It was the last part, perhaps, that really made her wince to recall.

She wondered now, while sipping a glass of wine and watching the stars come out, how much farther things would have progressed that evening if she hadn’t lost the battle with her overwhelming urge to hurl. Would Ben have called a halt to their hot, urgent, hump-fest? Was he even now regretting what he’d done, feeling guilty because of Elle? There had been no direct communication from him in the two weeks that the crew had been gone. As usual these days, George was the crew’s point of contact and the one to touch base with headquarters.

But Lauren couldn’t help wishing – expecting – hoping - that Ben might have sent her a personal email or called her cell phone to – what? Apologize? See how she was feeling after what had certainly been a real bitch of a hangover? Set up a time to finally have that long overdue talk?

She shook her head impatiently, furious at herself to feel disappointed, and that she had ever allowed herself to feel hope. It couldn’t have been more obvious that Ben deeply regretted their heated make-out session, and that he’d very intentionally not contacted her as a way of re-establishing boundaries between them. He was still with Elle, after all, and even though there had been no announcement of an engagement as yet, that didn’t mean it wasn’t forthcoming. And Lauren had definitely made a fool of herself with her wanton behavior that night, especially since Ben now knew without a doubt that she was still attracted to him. She had no idea how she was going to be able to face him in a couple of days, and even less idea how she could possibly continue to work with him now.

The emails had been drafted for days now. She had typed both of them up her second night here in the islands, and had made daily revisions to the longer of the two. But she’d lacked the nerve to actually press the Send button, knowing there would be repercussions involved when she did.

This trip to the Andaman and Nicobar Islands had been a bittersweet one for Lauren. The crew had made the most of their time here – snorkeling, diving, exploring – and she had loved the wildness of the place, the unspoiled beaches, the spicy, exotic foods.

But always in the back of her mind had been the thought that this would in all likelihood be her last trip with Karl, Chris, and George – her final assignment with the magazine. It all depended on whether or not she had the guts to hit that damned Send button.

The sliding door of the room next to hers opened, and Karl ambled out onto his adjoining balcony, carrying a bottle of some local beer.

“Thought I’d find you out here,” he drawled, resting his arms on the balcony railing just as she was doing.

She shrugged. “Our last night here. Might as well enjoy it. When we get back to New York in a couple of days – literally, thanks to our fantastic flight arrangements – it will already be autumn. Summer will be over.”

“Not for long,” reminded Karl. “When it’s autumn in New York, it’s spring in other parts of the world. And you can’t stop the seasons from changing, kiddo. Nothing stays the same forever, you know.”

Lauren reached across the low ledge that separated their balconies and hooked her arm through his, leaning her head on his shoulder. “Don’t remind me, you jerk. We’ve had a good thing going these last few years – you, me, and Chris – and now you want to spoil it all.”

Karl chuckled, pressing a brotherly kiss to the top of her head. “Matter of opinion, Your Majesty. I can tell you that my new wife has a very different point of view.”

She shook her head. “Don’t forget I’ve been caught in the middle of too many of your epic battles over the years. How in hell are you going to actually live together?”

“I’ll admit the thought has me a little worried, to,” replied Karl. “But ever since Tam found out she was pregnant, our whole relationship has changed. It’s like we both decided at the same time to put aside our individual issues and focus on raising our kid the right way. We decided,” he added somberly, “that it was finally time for both of us to grow up.”

Lauren stuck her lip out in a pout. “Well, hell, where’s the fun in that?” she joked. “Maybe some of us don’t want to grow up, you know?”

“I know,” Karl told her gently, squeezing her shoulder. “But like it or not, kiddo, it’s time. At least for me and Tam. Having a baby is serious stuff, and I can’t continue taking the risks involved when we go on these trips.”

“Risks? Hah! What risks?” she demanded. “It’s not like we’re war correspondents or anything.”

“Agreed. But we do take risks every time we’re on an assignment. Like rappelling down canyons, flying in small planes and helicopters, bar fights in Croatia,” he teased. “Not to mention that all this traveling is hard on a relationship. Ben’s going to have a tough decision on his hands if he decides to – uh, never mind.”

But Lauren was like the proverbial dog with a bone when she scented some juicy gossip. “What about Ben? And what’s this tough decision he has to make? Oh. Do you mean about the engagement?”

Karl gave her an odd look. “What engagement? To Elle? Who told you that?”

Lauren drained her wine glass. “She did. Just before they went on that trip to Spain last month. She seemed pretty sure that he was going to pop the question during their vacation.”

Karl shook his head. “First time I’m hearing about it. And given the fact that Ben might decide to take my job when I leave at the end of the year, I doubt he’s thinking about getting married. And – ah, shit, I just spilled the beans, didn’t I?”

She laughed and placed a smacking kiss on his bearded cheek. “You always were lousy at keeping secrets. It’s one of the many things I’m going to miss about you. Now, what’s all this about Ben taking your job? Where did you hear that bit of news?”

He sighed. “I really shouldn’t say anything, especially since I was the one who put the idea in his head right before we left on this trip. Who knows if he’s taking it seriously or not. But it sounds like he definitely won’t be staying in his current job once his contract’s up. Hates all the paper pushing and the meetings, and not being part of the action.”

“Wow.” She shook her head in disbelief. “That would be – mind-blowing. I mean, it’s not only a complete change of direction in his career, but it would mean a pay cut as well. And I can’t imagine Elle would be too happy with him traveling so much. She seems – needy.”

Karl guffawed. “Ya think? Not to mention the bigger issue that I pointed out to Ben – namely, how Elle would really, really not like the idea of him traveling with you. I doubt she could handle the two of you taking the Staten Island Ferry together, much less traveling to exotic locales for two weeks at a time.”