Making a fist, he shut his eyes—and laughed. The sound was torturous. “The woman who never stopped smiling, died with tears in her eyes, because the man she loved until the very end refused to see her! Isn't that amazing? Isn't life fucking amazing?”

Clutching my hands together, I saw the visceral pain contorting his face. Once, as a child, I'd encountered a rabid dog roaming the streets. It's eyes had been rolling, unhinged. Spittle coated it's soaked snout.

Someone had called the police, hoping to prevent anyone from getting hurt. As I watched from the safety of a bank, the dog went after the cop who approached. He shot it before it could dig in its fangs.

In that moment though, I'd seen the pure desire to kill in the eyes of a living creature.

Now, I saw that in Abell.

He was dangerous, he was broken. Being close to someone like this was as reckless as wanting to build a house on the edge of a volcano.

The smartest thing would be to turn, walk out that door, and forget everything.

The contract... my company... the marriage...

Everything.

Crossing the room, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him against me.

Abell jolted, resisting me before going slack. In the darkness, disbelief fueled his stare. “Stop,” he whispered. “Don't try and act like you care. No one fucking cares. This world is full of selfish, shitty people. No one is worth loving. Not anymore.”

“Say what you want,” I mumbled against his chest. “I remember a night when a certain man, in all his glory, tore down a grassy hill to save someone he didn't know. There was no reason to step in. He just did it... because he cared.”

Gripping my chin, he angled me upwards. The glow in his eyes made me grateful he was holding me up. “You think that I saved you just because I cared?”

“Yes.”

“Maybe I hoped you'd be so thankful, you'd spread your legs for me.”

He's trying to hurt me. “That wasn't it. You said another girl was waiting for you, I remember. Saving me, saving Trish, it messed your night up. You knew it would, and you still acted. Don't lie to me.”

Abell's expression was rampant with chiseled grooves. He challenged me in that silence, dared me to bail under the intensity in his glare.

But I wouldn't break. I had fire in me, and he knew it.

Cradling me to him, he crushed my face to his chest until my skull throbbed. It was pain, but I loved it. “Thank you,” he said softly.

Hearing his heart beat, I wanted... I wanted to stay there. We could hide away in this room full of memories, never facing the people who had hurt us. I'd never run from anything before, but he made it feel so easy.

I was shaking; we both felt it. “Sorry. It's cold in here,” I lied.

Abell's lips quirked. “You use that line as an excuse a lot. Let me finally warm you up.”

My attention was frozen on his mouth. “But... the agreement,” I said in a hush.

From his pocket, he lifted the mistletoe. “Holiday tradition trumps everything.”

I licked my lower lip, my lungs constricting. “Tradition. Right. That...”

His mouth glided across mine, linking us tight. Abell was warm, even cozy. It would have been magical to stand there, our tongues slipping together as the rest of the world—my responsibilities—faded away.

In my pocket, my phone buzzed, shattering the moment.

Abell leaned back, both of us gasping softly as we parted. The stars in his eyes held me steady, chained me there in his arms. He said, “I think your brother is calling. It's probably time to leave.”

Shoving my emotions down, enough to back away, I dusted my dress off. “Right. Yeah. We should go before he sends in a search party.”

Why did he stop kissing me?

And why did it make me feel so anxious?

Together we left the room, our hands dangerously close to touching by our sides. I was aware of the distance, I wanted to close it, and I knew it was wrong.

Everything about this was wrong.

On the edge of the main foyer, surrounded by the crowd, Gram was typing into his phone. Breaking away from Abell, I waved an arm. “Gram!”

He looked up when I called to him. “Nicky! There you are! I had started to think you weren't here.”

I jogged to meet him. Before I could say another word, I pulled up short—Abell had clasped my shoulders from behind, effectively stopping me in my tracks.

From my vantage, I got to witness the unease in my brother's eyes.

Abell said, “You must be Gram. Nice to meet you in person.” Stepping beside me, he held out a hand.

Gram shook it, eyes narrowing a fraction. “Same. Thanks for the invite, your house is amazing.”

“It's not mine, but I'll take the credit,” Abell said. I saw his hand squeeze, knuckles going bloodless. Wincing, he pulled away, shaking his fingers with a shallow laugh. “Nice strong grip you have there, brother-in-law.”

Gram's shoulders balled up by his ears. His smile was tight as a drum. “Don't get ahead of yourself.”

They were weighing each other, the silent judgment of two men trying to discover the intent of the other. It was a silly attempt at machismo. I didn't need, or want, either of them starting a fight. “Hey, both of you, stop it.”

“Stop what?” Gram asked.

Rolling my eyes, I gave him a light shove. “You know what. Quit sizing him up. And you, Abell, don't antagonize him.”

“I'm not!”

I lifted one eyebrow. “You are. Just quit it. This is a Christmas party, we should be full of good cheer.”

A loud ringing cut through the air.

Conversation died, and I looked up, spotting Corin at the center of the room. He had a glass held high, tapping the rim with a spoon. At the sight of his smug smile, my stomach dropped. What the hell is he doing?

“Attention,” he said loudly. “I'd like to make a toast.” He scanned the room, finally halting when he found me. I stopped breathing. “The Birch family wants to welcome Nichole Halloway into our fold. She and my son are going to be married at the end of the month, and I for one couldn't be happier. And, you're all invited to the reception!”

All attention was on me. Glasses went up, a cacophony of happy 'cheers!' rumbling over and over. The applause became a hurricane.

And to my credit, I managed a fake smile.

I smiled and smiled and waved a hand politely.

And Corin's eyes never left mine.

- Chapter Nine -

Nix

In a flash, the days went by. They evaporated hour by hour, until finally, the current date slammed into me like a car crash.

Today I'd be trying on my wedding dress.

How did two weeks just vanish? It had been a blur. I'd weathered it in a haze of planning, firm acceptance...

And the occasional cocktail in the afternoon.

But there was more plaguing me than just the wedding. Abell had drilled himself into my life. He found numerous ways to be close to me, always pushing the limits—always trying to get me to buckle to him.

I'd been strong, but if I was honest, it had been a struggle. The bastard was too good at finding the cracks in my armor. One gritty whisper and my thighs were soaked. It was as if my atoms had been programmed to react to him.

Each day, the temptation to just drag him somewhere private so we could repeat what we'd done the night we'd met grew stronger.

I need to stop seeing him.

That was the answer; avoid Abell Birch.

Except when I stepped outside my door that evening...

Abell was waiting for me.

Dammit.

He was parked out front, leaning on the hood of his car. The sun was reflecting off of the glossy paint, but his teeth rivaled the shine. I'd never seen such a smug looking man. He wore it like it was his cologne.