I tried not to think too much about having sex with Tana because when I did, it made the front of my jeans so painfully tight, the material closed around me like my junk was caught in a vice grip.
Just in case some shit went down, I told Juvante where I’d be but not with who even though he’d ribbed me about it. I didn’t want to give Tana a reputation she didn’t deserve. She wasn’t that kind of girl.
I tried to be calm and cool but I beat all the lights on the way to her house. My survival instinct kept telling me to drive the opposite direction but I didn’t listen. Like a man possessed, I kept the gas pedal down and the tires burning the asphalt around every turn.
The minute I pulled into her driveway, the door flung open and she hurried down the steps. Another short skirt, this one black, hugged her waist and showed off her long legs. I thought about having them wrapped around my waist and swallowed hard at the frenzy the image created in my head.
She eased into the passenger seat and then slapped her forehead. “I forgot my bag.” She ran back inside the house and came back breathing heavily. “Okay.”
I started to back out as she put on her seatbelt and she grabbed my arm. “Wait! I didn’t lock the door.” Fingers shaking, she opened her purse. When she pulled out a key ring, the force of her trembling made the keys dance together.
I took them from her, put the car in Park and pulled her head toward mine. She leaned in and the action made the skirt ride up, showing off her tanned thighs. I put my hand on her knee, clenching my teeth together at the contrast of hard and soft.
Her gaze locked on mine as I moved to kiss her softly. I could get drunk on the potency of her lips. I traced the inside of her lower lip with my tongue and she arched her back, returning the kiss with a small moan. When she opened her mouth a little more, I slid my tongue inside, mating it with hers.
“Ryan...” Her lips pulled at my lower lip, sucking on it and the top of my damn head nearly exploded.
I couldn’t remember ever wanting a girl as much as I wanted Tana, but now wasn’t the place. Not here in the front of my car where she’d be exposed to anyone who walked by. I gripped her arms and forced us to part. “Hold that thought,” I said before I went to lock the door of her house.
I returned and she gave a short laugh. “This is going to be the longest drive in my life."
“It’s not that far. About thirty miles.”
“That’s not what I meant.” She slid her hand across the console between us, palm up, and I linked my fingers with hers. With that simple act, I knew I was in trouble. I didn’t hold hands with girls. I didn’t go on dates. I didn’t make promises. I hoped that Tana wasn’t suddenly thinking there was going to be more to this than there would be. But more than that, I hoped I wasn’t beginning to think along the same lines.
I wanted to keep today focused on one thing. Give Tana what she wanted, hell, what she’d asked me to do for her, and let that be the end of it. But the churning in my stomach told me this was the beginning of something that could kick my ass if I wasn’t very careful.
Chapter Nine
TANA
The house looked exactly like what I remembered when I’d visited before with Shelby. Built atop a hill, it had a long driveway directly in front of the house that curved to end in front of a three car garage. There were flowers along either side of the brick walkway leading toward the porch. I’d helped Shelby plant some of them.
Ryan shut off the car and the sound of birds chirping in the nearby trees filled the silence between us. When the silence became almost unbearable, I tried to think of something to say. But what would I say? There were no conversation etiquette books for losing your virginity. I reached through the space between the two seats for the bag in the back and hauled it up front, clutching it to me like a shield.
Without a word, Ryan got out and waited for me outside the car, smiling when he caught me biting my lip. He knew me well enough to know it was a habit I had when I was procrastinating over something I didn’t want to say or do. I didn’t want him to think I was stalling even though I was. Not because I didn’t want this, because I wanted it so much it’d kept me awake last night. I was stalling because the unknown was kind of scary.
I walked past him and put the key in the lock. Ryan’s breath was right on my neck and I had to concentrate to turn the key to get the door open. I shook off the brain fog as we stepped into the foyer. Off to the left, a wide staircase covered in tan carpet led up to the master bedroom. The upstairs had a walkway that circled the living room so you could see down on it. The north wall of the living room was made entirely of windows that didn’t have any curtains. But since they overlooked the back of the two acre property, privacy wasn’t an issue. A long, curved black leather sofa faced part of the window. The other part of it faced a big screen television. On the opposite side of the television, was the fireplace where Shelby and I had made S’mores.
Realizing Ryan hadn’t said a word since our arrival, I turned to face him and set my bag down at my feet. “Say something,” I pleaded, biting my lip this time to stop the shaking.
“It’s a beautiful place.”
“That’s it?” I’d expected something more along the lines of us getting started and I told him as much.
He raised his eyebrows. “We have all night. There’s no rush.”
Images danced around in my mind. “Will it take all night?”
He gave me his look that meant he knew how to handle the situation. “If you do it right,” he said softly.
God, it was hot in here. Plucking at my shirt, I fanned the material up and down. “Shelby said the kitchen was stocked. Are you hungry?” I cringed inwardly at the high pitched sound of my voice babbling like an idiot.
“Yeah. I am.” He dropped his bag. “Come here.” He put his hands on my waist and leading the way to the sofa, he gently tipped me so I landed on the soft cushions.
“First, you get comfortable. You’re wound too tight.” He moved over me and wedged his body beside me at the front of the cushion so I was pushed against the back of the sofa. The feeling was a paradox. Behind me softness hugged my ass, curving and conforming to me. In front of me, the solidness of Ryan’s body, every bit of it rock hard, pushed against my breasts, against my pelvic area with uncompromising hardness. The contact was frenzying.
“I can’t relax like this,” I said, almost panting, trying to calm my breathing before I hyperventilated and passed out. That would be so embarrassing.
“Too bad you can’t relax. This feels really good to me.”
He lifted the back of my head, his fingers tangling in my hair. Tugging lightly, he exposed the length of my neck and chased kisses from beneath my chin to my collarbone. The trail he left behind electrified my skin.
“It’s h-hard to relax when...” I reached for the bottom of his T-shirt and started working it upward. I didn’t even clear his taut abdomen before he stopped me.
Then with one swift motion, he slid a hand under me and shifted our position until I was lying beneath him with the full weight of his body on top. The hardness of his thighs pinned me down with a heaviness that made me feel wet and miles past ready for him. He covered my mouth with his and kissed me hard followed by sweet and tender tugs at my lips and I could not get close enough. I craved him with an intensity that made me feel like I would starve to death if I didn’t have him. The strength of my feelings scared me. This was supposed to be about losing my virginity, moving on with my life and nothing more. I was not supposed to lose myself in him.
He skimmed his lips across my T-shirt, stopping to kiss my breast through the fabric. My nipples hardened under his caress and he found them, gently biting down. I could hardly believe that deep moan came from me.