And there’s Kitty, beautiful, innocent Kitty, who has suffered enough terror for a lifetime, smiling and laughing with a cute guy and I’m going to walk up to her with my poison and beg her to breathe it in one more time. Help me, Kitty. Help me save my brother who tried to kill you three times. Help me because it wasn’t his fault. Help me because you’re good and brave and because you love me and I need you. Trust me and be terrified again.

“Van?” Gil Bishop blocks the weak sunlight coming through the high window. Big and broad with worried blue eyes, a giant frowning teddy bear with a buzz cut. He’s the only one of Kitty and Jamie’s friends who calls me Van and a painful rush of longing for him, Abe, Lila, Imogen and even prickly Kaylee washes through me. If I wasn’t leaning against the wall, I’m not sure I could stand. It’s over. All over. This group. These friends who let me in, overlooking my brooding and difficult behaviour, belong to Jamie, not me. No more Gil and his bear hugs because I can’t be with them and be reminded again and again of what I’ve lost.

“Van?” Gil tilts his head and I realise I’ve been staring at him.

I force myself to straighten up. “Sorry, away with the fairies.”

“Sadistic fairies who drain your will to live?”

I laugh, a dead flat sound. “Something like that.”

He searches my face. “I guess it’s not a coincidence my best friend looks like he’s had his heart ripped out and stuck on a pike?”

Dizziness hits me and I close my eyes. “Um.”

“Whoa.” Gil steadies me, and I fight the urge to burst into tears and bury my face in his massive chest. “Evie, what the hell is going on?”

“I’m okay. I … what did Jamie say?”

“He didn’t.”

“Right … um.” With all the things to worry about I hadn’t once considered what to tell people at school. “You should probably ask him.”

He lets me go, watching me warily. “This isn’t about the cheerleader?”

“The what?”

He nods across the corridor where a handful of ponytails flip glowering looks at me. I stare blankly back at them. A petite redhead scowls. I try to access the details. Jamie told me the morning after – I did something at the dance – but all I can latch on to is the memory of lying in my bed, wrapped in Jamie’s arms, our legs scissored together.

Gil pulls a rumpled copy of The Collegiate Times from his backpack and smooths out the front page. A comic strip titled “The Angel Avenger Strikes Back”. Three panels. A scantily clad cheerleader, leering, nails like talons, gripping the rippling chest of a hypnotised boy. A leggy Lara Croft, vaulting a beverage table, eyes burning with vengeance, braid trailing, chest thrust forwards. The boy fainting in Lara Croft’s arms, her eyes smoking and next to them a smouldering pile of ash topped with pompoms. “I’m not sure this is a fair or accurate representation of our Skipper.”

I can’t even work my way to outrage. “Um …”

“Too many ums, Van. I’m not liking the ums. You know there’s no way he’d ever–”

“No. Gil, it’s nothing like that.”

“Then what? You had a fight? People have fights.”

Vision blurring, I frown at the floor, the ringing in my ears growing louder.

“Van,” Gil drops his voice low. “Tell me you haven’t broken up with him. I can’t be on suicide watch.”

I lift my head, biting the inside of my cheek. I rest my hand in the middle of his chest and give a tremulous smile. “You’re very sweet, but I can’t do this.”

I step away, not looking back when he calls my name, ignoring the curious glances of other girls and boys, the fevered chattering of the cheerleaders, heads now huddled together.

I. Won’t. Cry.

As I approach Kitty and Pete, Pete looks up and his smile wavers. He releases Kitty’s hand … then I realise he’s worried I’ll tell Jamie.

“It’s okay.” My reassuring pat jars his shoulder and my voice sounds stupid and jolly. “I won’t tell.”

He grimaces and rotates his arm in the socket.

“Hmph,” Kitty snorts. “Jamie can pull his head in.”

Pete tucks his dark hair behind his ears, his expression morose. “He’s just, you know, being a brother.”

“Don’t defend him.” Kitty knots her arms then notices my expression. “Are you okay? Have you been crying? Oh God, it’s not Angelo’s T-shirts? Evs, you can’t take them seriously. The Not without a mint ones died off, these will too.”

“I need to talk to you. It’s kind of private.”

“No sweat.” Pete gives me the same wary look I saw on Gil’s face. “I’ll see you later, Kit.”

She barely acknowledges his goodbye, taking in the full wreck of my pallor and shadowed grooves beneath my eyes. “This isn’t about T-shirts, is it? What’s going on? Have you slept? You look like … like–”

“Crap. I know.” I lean past the edge of the locker to peek through a classroom door. “We can talk in here.”

Kitty follows me in. I shut the door behind her and pull the blind down.

“What’s going on?” she demands. “Where have you been? You haven’t answered any of my messages and no car pool this morning.”

“Miriam dropped me off. I’m grounded.”

“Is this about your sleepover?” Her lips retract like she’s tasted something revolting.

“He told you?”

“As if.” She shudders. “I heard Barb going on at Dad about Jamie staying out all weekend. I put two and two together.”

“All weekend?”

“Listen, you’re my best friend and all but I do not want to know what you and my brother have been–”

“We broke up.” The words stick together.

“What?”

“They came for me, Saturday. It’s over.”

Kitty sits slowly on the edge of a desk, her hand coming to her mouth.

“They gave me a tracker, they questioned me and–” I spread my hand over my abdomen and my mouth dries. I won’t tell her about that.

“Affinity?” she whispers, her hand sliding up the back of her neck.

“Didn’t Jamie explain?”

“He only came home this morning. I didn’t see him. Barb said he had a shower, changed his clothes and left for school without me. She was upset but I thought that was because he’d been at your place.”

I shake my head. Where on earth did he go without shoes or a jacket?

Her brow puckers. “Hang on. They came for you and you’re still here.”

I stumble over the explanation of the reprieve that I don’t even understand.

“Early Detection …” she says, murmuring to herself, looking thoroughly creeped out. “And they made you break up? How exactly do they police that?”

I gesture at the back of my head, still biting hard on the inside of my cheek.

Her face crumples. “Oh God, Evs. No wonder you look like hell. You poor thing … poor Jamie. He’ll go mad. He’s in love with you. You know that?”

I squeeze my eyes shut. “Not for long.”

She comes and wraps her arms around me. “Don’t say that.”

“You don’t understand,” I say, mumbling into the top of her head.

“What?” She strokes my back.

I stall at the cliff edge of my point, mute with fear.

“Evs,” she chokes. “Too tight.”

I release her and she takes a step back, pressing her hand to her chest. I still stand there, paralysed before the abyss.

“You’re scaring me.”

Say it. Tell her. Now. “They’re going to kill Aiden.”

She stops blinking. “They told you that?”

“No. They don’t know anything about him but they will as soon as they take me in. They’ll Harvest my memories; I won’t be able to stop them.”

“But if you explain about everything – I mean, he’s deactivated, right?”

“They won’t care and they won’t take the risk.”

“But surely–”

“Kit, I’m telling you, they’ll kill him. Jamie and Miriam both said there’s no way Aff … there’s no way they’ll let him live.”

Her eyes grow wide. “You’re going to do something.”

I drop my gaze. “I need your help.”

There’s no reply.

The seconds string out and I force myself to look up, prepared for her disgust, and disbelief, but her face is set. “To do what?”