BOLO: AYW Enterprises, how can I help you? (Pause) Yes sir, we have exactly what you want. Candy's here tonight. (Pointing at LYZA, gesturing that she's to go into the next room) In fact, she's all alone, just kind of pacing around the bedroom….You know how girls get, right? If you'll just give me some credit card information for verification…(BOLO types some numbers into the keyboard, watches the screen.) Well, now that's just fine, sir. If you'll hold a moment, I'll connect you to Candy. (Gets up, walks briskly into the next room. LYZA is sitting by the Princess phone, back straight, breathing through her nose. ) You gonna be all right?

LYZA: Sure. I'm just centering, getting ready for the role.

BOLO: Okay. What this guy wants, it's almost like a date. Soft stuff, least that's what he told me. Use this script….(Handing her a folder from the milk crate) It'll kind of give you the guidelines. He wants a big, busty blonde, got it? You ready?

LYZA: Yes!

BOLO: (Goes back to his desk. Pushes a button.) All right, sir. I'm connecting you to Candy right now. Have a good evening. (Pushes a button, hits the timer. The digital timer starts counting.) [NOTE TO DIRECTOR: THIS CLOCK SHOULD COUNT FASTER THAN "REAL TIME."] (Calling across to LYZA) You're on.

LYZA: (Picking up the phone) Hello. (Double-syllable, sultry-voiced) Who is this? (Pause) Oh Sam, I'm so glad you called. I was getting so lonely, here, all by myself. (Pause) Oh, okay…well, I don't know where to start. I'm blonde, about five foot seven. I have big blue eyes….(Pause) Well, a girl doesn't like to talk about that but, since you asked so nicely, I'm about 38-24-37. (Pause) Well, I was just getting dressed when you called. I just have my stockings and garter belt on. I was just trying to stuff myself into this little bra when the phone rang. Just give me minute to get it hooked….(Miming the gesture of fastening a bra, holding the phone against her neck. Pause.) Oh! Okay, baby, if that's what you want. (Gestures like she's letting the bra fall to the ground.) Uhmmm…that's sweet. Yes, I really like that. (Arching her back, eyes closed. She's still murmuring into the phone. Blackout.)

Scene 2

LYZA is once again perched on the telephone desk, munching on a carrot stick. She's wearing a set of baggy sweats, heavy socks on her feet, hair down, reading a copy of Variety. BOLO is facing her. There is a sense of passage of time: the big clock over the charts now reads 2:05.

BOLO: You're getting pretty good at this, huh? That last guy, I thought he was going to stay on the line till dawn.

LYZA: I told you, didn't I'? I'm just getting into it. Before you know, they'll all be asking for me.

BOLO: I believe it, girl. But remember what I told you, the later it gets, the more they come out from under the rocks.

LYZA: I know. I know. It doesn't matter. It's a job, like you said.

An acting job. And I'm good at it. Go on, admit it…haven't

I done better than anyone else, my first night?

BOLO: You have, that's a fact. And they all say, the girls, the first one's the hardest. This is what's happening now. You know, all that safe sex stuff…AIDS and all. What some people say, in the nineties, phone sex is going to be how people get off.

LYZA: Poor sorry bastards. They must really be lonely, to spend this kind of money just to have someone talk to them on the phone.

BOLO: I don't think they're so different, really. I read in this magazine once…you get to do a lot of reading on a job like this…I read that therapy is nothing more than the purchase of friendship.

LYZA: What's that supposed to mean?

BOLO: Well, what the writer was saying, it's like, if you had a real good friend, you could tell them your problems, you understand? Tell them your secrets. You got nobody to listen to you, you tell a therapist. And they charge by the hour too.

LYZA: But a therapist isn't just supposed to listen–he's supposed to help you, right?

BOLO: I think this stuff does help them. I mean, a lot of hookers, that's what they call themselves now. Therapists, right? Surrogate therapy, role playing…all the stuff they advertise for…that's just fancy names for sex. And it helps, sometimes. Sex, I mean. Gives the blues a real kick in the ass if you're down.

LYZA: But they know…I mean, they know I wouldn't be talking to them if they didn't pay.

BOLO: It's fantasy, like I told you. That's part of the fantasy, see? That you're really their girlfriend or whatever. It doesn't hurt anyone.

(The phone rings. BOLO picks it up. Goes through his spiel. LYZA is already heading into her room. BOLO tells the caller to hang on. Goes over to the chart, checks S&M with a Magic Marker, walks into LYZA's room.)

BOLO: I know this guy. He wants a different girl every time. One of those "let's meet and beat" freaks. He wants a hard-core fem-dom. It's this script (Handing her a folder) And you'll probably have to use this too. (Handing her a leather belt) You up for it?

LYZA: Sure. Let's play.

BOLO: (Returns to his once, picks up phone) All right sir, Mistress Tanya has agreed to speak with you. Hold on just a second, now.

LYZA: (Picks up the phone) Who is this? (Poring over the script, speed-reading, moving her finger along the page. Hard, cold, domineering voice.) You want a lesson, do you? Well, you came to the right place. This is Mistress Tanya. Now get on your knees and tell me what you did to deserve discipline. (BOLO makes a gesture of approval. LYZA acknowledges it, but brushes him off concentrating on her lines. Pause.) Is that right? I can't hear you, you miserable little creature, speak up! (Pause) That's right…that's right. Tell me the whole thing. Don't you dare leave anything out.

(BOLO, satisfied she has it under control, and proud of her speed-reading, gives her a high five, walks out of the room. The audience sees LYZA whispering into the phone. BOLO goes into his office, picks up a magazine, starts to read. LYZA keeps talking on the phone. Phone rings.)

BOLO: AYW Enterprises, how can I help you? (Pause) Sure. No problem. Absolutely. You don't find any of the girls here drawing those kinds of lines, sir. I mean, people have a right to express themselves, don't they' Sure. All I need is a credit card number and you're in business. Yes sir, okay. Now if you'll just stay on the line while I run that through…

(Focus shifts back and forth between BOLO and LYZA emphasized by lighting and by who is speaking most audibly. BOLO occasionally answers a call, switches the lines, taps into his computer. LYZA slips off her sweatpants. She's wearing the fishnet stockings and a garter belt under them. She puts on her spike heels, all the while talking into the phone. LYZA stalks around the room, obviously speaking in a commanding voice. Finally, she picks up the leather belt.)

LYZA: (Slapping the belt hard against the desk) You want some more of that? Yeah, well you're going to get it anyway. Here! (More slaps) Now get back on your knees and lick my boots, you piece of garbage. Do it!

(BOLO shakes his head good-naturedly. Blackout.)

 

Scene 3

They're both back in BOLO s office. The big clock now reads 3:15. LYZA has a sweatshirt on over her stockings and heels, pacing back and forth, a little pumped, but still under control. LYZA: I can't believe there's guys like that.