Harris’s shoulders slumped forward, pitching him on the edge of his chair. He stared at the carpet, as if he was hoping a hole would appear that he could dive into.

‘Now he’s slightly more reliable than Brogan, proper letters after his name and everything,’ said Valentine. ‘I’m sure that’s good enough for the courts, don’t you think, Eddy?’

43

Darry Millar sat in the Ardrossan ferry terminal and watched Jade collect two teas from the little kiosk. The woman with the tabard and the bad perm who was serving seemed to be eying Jade up and down, she’d be from the island, people tended to have a strange view of mainlanders on Arran. When his sister returned he took the styrofoam cup and started to blow on the top of the greying liquid.

‘Looks like shit,’ said Jade.

‘Bet it doesn’t taste much better, but beggars can’t be choosers, can they?’

They sat in silence for a moment, watched the day-trippers and tourists arriving, there were backpackers and wealthier middle-aged couples who had left their BMWs in the car park, preferring not to risk a scratch or two on the ferry crossing.

‘Why Arran, Darry?’

‘We need to get away for a bit.’

Jade grimaced as she tasted the tea, placed the cup on the floor beside her chair leg. ‘You say that like we’re going on holiday too.’

‘It’s not going to be a holiday, Jade. Far from it,’ said Darry. ‘I’ve got unfinished business with Fin, I told you that.’

‘You don’t even know he’s there.’

‘He’s there.’

‘How do you know that?’

‘Because when I spoke to him on your phone I heard the sound of the ferry horn, I couldn’t mistake it.’

‘That could have been anywhere.’

‘It was Arran, I knew he’d go there. I know just the spot, the bothy we used to camp in when we were kids, we even stayed there when we came here with the army, the regiment all had proper billets but Fin wanted to go to the bothy, he’s sentimental like that. Won’t feel so bloody nostalgic about the place when I get a hold of him, mind.’

Jade got to her feet. ‘I’m sick of hearing about you and Fin. Since when was any of this just about the pair of you?’ She turned from Darry and stamped towards the ferry exit, as she went her foot connected with the tea cup and sent it spilling across the floor.

‘Jade, wait up …’ Darry picked up his things and ran after his sister, splashing through the spilled tea.

He found her in the bar on the top deck, staring out at the open waters. She looked forlorn, like she was thinking about the past, or worse, the future.

‘Found you at last …’ He put the newspaper he’d bought and a chocolate bar on the table behind her.

‘Had to be somewhere.’

‘Suppose.’ The ferry was leaving port, people crammed themselves into the bolted-down tables and chairs, it was busy but not as packed as the peak season. Darry offered his sister the chocolate, she declined and he joined her staring out at the sea. ‘I used to love coming over here. Going to the castle in Brodick and climbing Goatfell, it’s a beautiful little place.’

‘It looks miserable today.’ Jade stared out the window.

‘It might pick up when we get there.’ He was ashamed by the triteness of his remark. He knew it wasn’t a pleasure cruise, it wasn’t even a proper escape from all they’d been through. It was a detour that he had to take to sort out something personal before he could even think about helping Jade get her own life back to normality.

‘No it won’t pick up.’ Jade turned away from the window, started to flick through the Evening Times.

Darry placed a hand on the cover, ‘Stop that. I want to talk to you.’

A huff. ‘What about now?’

‘Look, if you can stop being so teenage for a moment and tell me what happened, y’know, on the night Jim died. I really need to know.’

‘I am teenage. And he was murdered, don’t you read the papers?’

‘Jade, please. I need everything straight in my head before we see Fin.’

‘I don’t know what you want me to say, I wasn’t there when it happened.’

Darry pressed his weight onto his elbows, the table-top was strong enough to stay firm. ‘You were thereabouts, you were home before it all kicked off.’

‘I don’t want to talk about it anymore.’

‘Jade, I do. If we’re ever going to get Mum back and get this mess cleaned up then we’re going to have to do a damn sight more talking about the events of that night.’

She put her face in her hands, shook her head. When she spoke, it came in a slow, childish droll. ‘Jim got home, and there was a row. Mum was screaming at him and he was laughing and teasing her, I think she knew or guessed about me. She’d been asking me what was wrong for long enough, what with all the crying and moods and everything, she must have guessed.’

‘Are you sure, Jade? I mean, they’ll ask about that in court or whatever.’

She nodded. ‘He … he said I was a little slag, that we were all little whores in the end and Mum, she … She started to hit him. I couldn’t hear everything properly after that, they went into the kitchen. I heard her screaming and screaming at him, and when her voice rose she said he was a liar and she wanted him out of her house and that she didn’t know what she ever saw in him.’ Jade started to weep.

‘You’re doing fine, keep going.’

‘There was some stuff about Dad, nasty stuff that Jim said but Mum wouldn’t let him. I think she attacked him with something then, I don’t know what, a pan maybe, something metal because it clanged on the ground afterwards. There was a lot of noise, a lot of screaming after that, but I never heard Jim’s voice again. Then Mum ran out.’

‘Where were you?’

‘I was outside by then, I ran out. I stayed over the road, it was raining and dark. I saw Mum stumble into the wall, then she fell in the garden. I couldn’t look, I just buried my face in my hands and wanted it all to go away, but then that old bat from the house across the road appeared, she said something to Mum and I just ran. I wanted it to be all over, I didn’t want to think. I just ran away and sat under a tree trying to block it all out. I didn’t move. I didn’t do anything until the police came … and that’s when I called you.’

Darry sat quietly. He watched Jade sobbing and wiped the tears from her cheeks. ‘You’ve done well, Jade. You don’t need to tell me any more.’

‘Darry, I know you blame Fin now, but you shouldn’t.’

‘That’s enough, Jade. You don’t know what you’re talking about.’

‘I do, you think he should have been looking out for me but he couldn’t be there every minute of the day. Fin was good to me, he said he would help, said he would help me get this sorted.’ She rubbed her stomach. ‘He said he’d pay for it and make sure that we could get away and start again if we had to.’

Darry turned around the newspaper, flicked the pages. ‘Stop now, Jade. You don’t understand, if it wasn’t for Fin then Jim Tulloch would never have been anywhere near us. He was a psychopath and Fin brought him into our home, he followed Fin to Ayr, and that’s what all this mess is about – Jim’s twisted revenge for something that happened in Afghanistan. Fin has wrecked our family, Mum’s in hospital, you were raped for Christ’s sake, Jade. A friend should never have let that happen, and he was supposed to be my friend.’

‘You’re just looking for someone to blame, you’re angry and want to hit out. In a while, Darry, you’ll calm down and see that this was nothing to do with Fin.’

Darry fell silent, stared at the newspaper spread out on the table in front of him. He didn’t listen to Jade, because whatever she said it wouldn’t change the monumental news looking back at him from the pages of the newspaper.

‘Darry, do you hear me?’

He looked up from the tabletop. His eyes were glazed over, like he had just wakened from sleep.