“We should go to the bus station and try to get some sleep.” Matt cocked his head at me. “What is it? Why do you look like you lost your puppy?”

How did I explain this to him? Well, Matt, after splitting my soul, I feel like a complete psycho with a split personality. I still love Alex, but looking at you, I just want to throw myself in your arms and kiss you.

“Just tired, I guess.” Yeah, that was a better answer.

“The cashier said the bus station was two blocks down on the left.”

A car pulled into the parking lot, so we decided to leave the bathroom keys in the door locks instead of risking going back inside the store again. The fewer people who saw us, the better. While we walked, I kept my hands shoved in my pockets. I wasn’t afraid of Matt trying to hold my hand. I was afraid of me wanting to hold his. I loved Alex, and if I was fully in the underworld with him, it would be his arms I’d want around me. His hand I’d be holding. But this part of me—my completely human soul—had never been with Alex. Matt and I had a history together, one based on me being normal, not Ophi.

We stepped into the bus station and found the bus we needed. Matt pointed the way, gently placing his hand on the small of my back. He used to do that all the time when we walked down the halls at school, but now…

He looked down at his hand. “Sorry. Old habits and all that.”

I shook my head. “It’s okay.” No, it wasn’t.

I looked at the empty wooden bench. It wasn’t exactly sanitary.

“Here.” Matt sat down and motioned for me to join him. “You can put your head in my lap so your hair doesn’t stick to whatever this substance is coating the bench. My guess is year-old chewing gum and…well, I don’t want to know what else.”

Put my head in his lap and sleep? That was way too intimate.

“Jodi.” He frowned at me. “You know you can trust me. I’m not going to do anything to you while you sleep.”

He wasn’t the one I was worried about. “I know that.” It was four in the morning, and I was exhausted, so I curled up on the bench next to him and rested my head on the edge of his lap, not daring to touch any more of him than necessary.

I closed my eyes and wondered what Alex was doing.

Chapter 13

Heat prickled against my skin as I led the soul past Tony and Ethan and into the depths of Tartarus. He cowered behind me, not wanting to follow but unable to stop his legs from moving. I knew the feeling. Hades had done the same thing to me on several occasions.

“Please, don’t make me go. I’m sorry. For everything. Please.” He grabbed my hand, squeezing it with every sobbing heave of his body.

“I’m sorry, but there’s nothing I can do. Once the judges make their decision, I have to follow their judgment. They said to bring you here. I’m powerless to change your fate.” Even as the words left my mouth, they felt foreign. I was going through the motions down here. The only reason I was aware of what my body and Ophi soul were doing in the underworld was because my human soul was asleep. When I tuned out one soul, the other took over.

The man, Henry Something-or-Other, continued to wail. Knowing what awaited him in Tartarus, I couldn’t help feeling sorry for the guy, even if he had done terrible things in his life. I wasn’t really one to judge.

“Oh, good. Another one.” Abby smirked. “Who knew there were so many damned sinners in the world?”

“You’re one to talk. Your punishment didn’t end too long ago.”

Her eyes burned into mine. “And it will be time for yours again soon.”

I turned away, not wanting to see Henry’s horror or the look of pleasure on Abby’s face, and headed back to the palace. As I passed the Fields of Asphodel, I felt a pull in that direction.

“Jodi.”

Alex. I fought the urge to run into his arms. I had to be careful in case Hades was watching us. We never really knew where he was. Ever since we’d made the deal with him, we’d seen him less and less. It was strange, but the second I tuned in to my Ophi soul, I had access to all my memories in the underworld. I just had to be careful not to access them all at once. Between the torture and bringing souls to their own personal forms of Hell, it got overwhelming really quickly.

I walked slowly to Alex, looking around for signs of Hades. “Hey.”

“You came.” He looked deep into my eyes. “It’s you. How? Did you release your soul already?”

“No. My human soul is sleeping, and that brought my focus back here. It’s happened before, though. When we were in Tartarus. The pain yanked my focus back to my body.” Just in time to see my dad. That image was hard to get past.

“The double vision thing is tough, huh? Tony said it would be, but I’ve been hoping he was wrong.” He reached for my hand, lacing my fingers through his. God, I missed him.

“Is it okay to be holding hands like this? I mean, will Hades—”

“He’s been leaving the underworld a lot. No clue where he’s going, but we end up unsupervised. He thinks we’re all still under his control, but when he’s gone we can do whatever we want. Our powers are too strong for him to keep a hold on.”

“He doesn’t have a clue, does he?”

“Not at all. Something’s going on. He’s too busy to notice us.”

“That can’t be good. What could he be looking for?” The thought hit me like a speeding Mack truck. “Do you think he knows what I’ve done?” I clutched Alex’s hand, squeezing it so hard he looked down at it.

“Easy, Jodi. I don’t think he suspects anything, but you have been different since you left.”

“Different how?”

“Every time you go by the Fields, I call out to you, but this is the first time you’ve responded.”

I’d been ignoring him. “I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head, dismissing it. “You’re not all here. I get it.” He got quiet for a moment, which could only mean he was thinking of how to ask about Matt.

“Things aren’t going so well for the human me, either. Matt had a tough time adjusting at first, but after I showed him his reflection—Brian’s reflection—he was pretty much up for believing anything I said. I left out some things, though. I didn’t want to overload him.”

Alex’s head jerked up. “What kind of things?”

“The whole ‘I brought him back wrong’ thing. You know, the bunny-eating incident.”

“Anything else?”

“He knows about us. I told him.”

He nodded and started breathing normally again. “Good. If he does anything, tries anything—”

“Matt’s not like that. He knows how I feel about you.” I didn’t want to tell him about the kiss—kisses. Or that Matt had said he still loved me. It wasn’t the right time to tell him. I didn’t know how much time I had left before I woke up and my focus shifted back to my human soul.

“I don’t want to, but I should go. I only have a couple hours to rest before the bus comes to take Matt and me back to the school.”

“He agreed to go with you?”

“Yeah. He needs to get used to his new body and decide how he’s going to start his life over.”

“Wait, you’re not ever going to release his soul? I thought this was just a temporary thing, to give him a break from his afterlife.”

“No. He deserves to live, Alex. I can’t let him die again.”

“Jodi, he’s a zombie. Maybe you gave him permission to act like himself, but he’s still not alive. He’s been dead too long.”

I hadn’t thought about that, but Matt seemed so different. He wasn’t like the other souls I’d brought back. He seemed so alive.

“I don’t know. I’ll figure it out. There’s still time for me to decide what to do about him.”

“Please think about this…”

Alex’s image faded as Matt gently shook my shoulder. “The bus is here.”

I sat up, rubbing my eyes. Alex was gone. I was with my human soul again. With Matt. I hadn’t gotten the chance to say goodbye or tell Alex I loved him.