Stunned, the council gaped like fish. I opened my mouth, but Keir cut us all off. He rose to his feet. “My army will depart in four days. I leave Simus of the Hawk to act as my Overlord. Once we reach the borders of your land, I will send word back, recalling Simus, and releasing Queen Xylara of her oaths of fealty to me. Arrange the coronation with all due speed.” With that, he inclined his head to me and extended his hand. I rose and took his hand automatically. Using his advantage, he pulled me forward, then pressed me onto the seat of the high throne.

The cheers exploded from the throats of my people. The entire council began to clap, cheering as well. Keir looked at them, nodded to me, then strode toward the antechamber. I rose to follow, but the council surged forward, to clasp my hand, hug me, and to express their joy.

Overwhelmed, I fell back on the throne, stunned. Warren fought his way to my side, urging people back, and cleared the space in front of me. Amidst the cheers of my people, I rose, and followed Keir into the antechamber.

He was standing by the fireplace when I walked in, facing the door. His face was grim, his eyes on the fire.

I stopped just inside the room. “What are you doing?”

“This Kingdom must be ruled, and you are the blood heir, the logical choice for the throne.” He never looked up, didn’t turn to face me.

“You have claimed me as Warprize.”

“I renounce that claim.”

I moved closer, watching the light of the flames dance on his face. The muscle of his jaw was twitching as his jaw clenched. “Renounce the claim?” There was no response. “Renounce me? After we—”

Keir just stood there, watching the flames. “This is your home. These people will keep you safe, safe from attackers, safe from injury, safe from harm.” He looked up at me, his eyes bright. I couldn’t tell if it was reflected firelight or something else. “Being a Warprize is not safe.” He returned to staring at the flames.

“Especially when I’ve surrendered everything to the Warlord, only to have it flung back in my face!” Goddess, that wasn’t true, but I was so hurt the words were out of my mouth before I could think. He’d given me hope and joy so bright it hurt and now he was dousing the flame. I crossed my arms over my chest, suddenly chilled in a way that had nothing to do with the heat of the fire.

Keir didn’t respond to my words.

I drew myself up, and stretched out a trembling hand. “Keir, don’t do this.” I took a step toward him. He jerked back, avoiding my touch. As I stood there, stricken, he seemed to relent. He drew me into his embrace, wrapping his arms around me as if I were a precious treasure. I leaned into his hug, feeling the leather under my cheek and the warmth of his body. He drew a deep breath, held it, and let it out slowly.

As carefully as he had enfolded me, he released me slowly, taking a long step back. Tears in my eyes, I looked up at him, smiling. But his face was just as grim, and to my horror he turned away and went through the door into the hall. I followed, only to find Simus, Joden, Warren and Other standing there. Anna was there as well, with a tray of tea and sweets. Marcus stood off to one side, already wrapped in his cloak.

Keir cleared his throat. “Simus, you will remain here, as my representative. Joden, you will return with me to camp.” He spun on his heel to look at me. “Warren, I charge you with Queen Xylara’s security. For her own safety, I forbid her access to my camp. She is to remain safe within the city walls until I depart.”

Everyone gaped at him. He turned, and strode away, with Joden and Marcus scrambling behind him. Seized with an outraged fury, I grabbed the tea pot off Anna’s tray, and hurled it at Keir’s head. It missed, flew into the wall, and shattered into a thousand pieces, spraying tea everywhere. Keir flinched, but kept moving.

Just as shattered as the pot, I spun on my heels and ran, crying, to my old bedroom.

An hour later, the door opened, and two servants brought in one of the crates from my stilltent. I looked up, still weepy-eyed as they set it down, and bowed themselves out of the room. It didn’t take long for me to pry open the rough lid. It contained my herb book, my notebooks, my under things, the vanilla soap and oils, and the white sheath. No note, no comment, no message. I sat on the floor next to it, and wept.

The next morn, I watched from the window as the army packed up and prepared to march, letting the tears flow down my cheeks. I sat by the window all day as the shadows lengthened, and the torches flared up in the darkness. How could he do this? Didn’t he want me? I’d heard stories of course, overheard kitchen maids sobbing to Anna about men who’d stolen their virtue and left them crying, alone. Was that it?

I hurt so much, my head, my heart. My sorrow seemed unending and bottomless. Over and over, the events of the past week flicked through my mind. I leaned my cheek against the rough stone and gave in to my despair.

Anna brought in food at regular intervals. I am fairly certain that she begged me to eat something.

Warren came in, with reports and documents that needed my attention. I am sure that some of them were important.

Remn came in, to talk books and the replacement of the stillroom. I am fairly certain that he talked for some time before he left.

Othur came in, and discussed duties and obligations. He talked for quite awhile, till finally I turned and stared at him. He looked into my eyes, sighed, and left.

Heath came in, and stood there for a bit. He walked up behind me, and laid a hand on my shoulder. When I looked up, he smiled. “Follow your heart, my sister.” He turned and left the room.

And so I sat, mired in sadness and grief, ‘til just after dawn.

Eln entered. With gentle, understanding hands, he pulled me away from the window, and seated me on the bed. He checked me over quietly, with no comment. I closed my puffy eyes and sat silently, my head aching something fierce. Finally, Eln put one finger under my chin and lifted my head. I opened my eyes to see his concerned face, before a strange look flashed over his features.

Eln slapped me.

The blow rocked my head back, and I saw stars. I jumped up, my hand pressed to my face in astonishment, and felt the heat in my cheek. Eln stood there glaring, his face disdainful. “Is this the girl that demanded to become my apprentice? Who healed the enemy in the face of her brother’s wrath? Who sacrificed her life for her people?” His mouth pursed, like he had tasted bad wine.

“Eln, I—”

“No excuses. You want something, you work for it, not sulk in your room weeping like a spoiled child. In all honor, either balance the needs of your people and your desires, or accept your responsibilities.” He drew himself up. “I am ashamed to claim you as student when you act like this.”

The heat that flooded my face had nothing to do with his blow. I bowed my head. “I’m sorry, Master.”

“Then do something.” Eln swept toward the door. “Bathing would be a good start.”

He left me standing there, looking down at my tear-stained tunic and feeling an utter fool. My old master was right. There was more at risk here than my heart, and I was acting like a spoiled child. Embarrassed, I wiped my face, gathered up clean clothes and opened the door to the hall. Two guards stood outside the door, and a chambermaid was sitting against the far wall. She jumped when I opened the door.

“Your Majesty.” She curtsied, wobbling a bit as she rose.

I grimaced. “Not very majestic at the moment.”

She fixed her eyes on me like a frightened doe.

“I’m going down to the baths. Would you ask Anna to have some food ready for when I’m done? I’ll come down to the kitchen.”

“I’d bring up a bath for you, Majesty, if you want.”

“No, thank you. Just please take my message to Anna.”