“Yeah, he couldn’t wait to tell me,” he snarls. “Why him, Joe? I thought we had something going. After last week, I thought you’d finally made your choice.”
“I did. I chose him.”
“Do you realize how little sense that makes?” he questions, his words laced with venom. “You have sex with me and then you choose him. Do you even know what the hell is going on in that head of yours?”
I glare at him, annoyed by his tone. “Having sex with you is what made me realize what I wanted. You and I? We were never going to happen, Ransom. It’s like Rebel said, I was his first.” The words flow out effortlessly and I realize in a sudden flash of clarity how true they are. Rebel captured me a long time ago.
“So that’s what it comes down to?” Tearing off his glasses, Ransom stares me down. “He had you first so he wins? What about what happened last weekend? Doesn’t seeing him with another woman influence your decision at all?”
“It wasn’t what it looked like. Rebel said—”
“Right,” Ransom says, cutting me off. “Because everything that comes out of Rebel’s mouth is the fucking gospel.”
“Shhhh! There are children here.” I look around, hoping none of them heard. Thankfully, everyone seems to be preoccupied with having fun, completely oblivious to our verbal sparring. “Rebel swears he doesn’t remember anything about that night, and he doesn’t know how she got in the apartment. But he’s going to look into it.”
“You know what’s funny, Joe?” Ransom says with a humorless laugh. “I never pegged you for being so naïve. Did it ever occur to you that she might have a key?”
It had occurred to me, which was why I was scoping out the apartment earlier. I was hoping—or rather, not hoping—that she would show up and I would catch her in the act of using it. Then I planned to take it from her—forcibly if I had to. Of course, this was all assuming she had one in the first place, which Ransom is now confirming she does.
“It doesn’t matter if she does or not,” I tell him, lifting my chin. “Rebel said they’ve been over for months.” I’m trying to be strong here, be reasonable and rational. I don’t want to leap to one conclusion after another. I want to believe Rebel, so I have to think before I act.
“Are you kidding me?” Ransom shakes his head as if he pities me. I clench my jaw, irritated beyond measure. “It doesn’t even matter that he’s been screwing his boss behind your back? That it’s clearly not over between them? You’re just going to stick your head in the sand and pretend that none of it ever happened? Pretend that we never happened.”
“What did you just say?” My blood is roaring in my ears now. I couldn’t have heard him right.
“Oh, he didn’t tell you?” Ransom’s lips curve up in a hateful smirk, making him look so unlike the man I’ve come to know, the one who was above such pettiness. It’s an ugly look on him. I would walk away from him this instant if I didn’t need to hear what he had to say.
“That’s right, Joe. Florence is his boss. She’s the one who sends him out on all those ‘business trips.’ Every now and then, she even tags along. I’m sure you can guess how they spend their time away.”
I’m going to be sick. My mind is racing, backtracking through my conversation with Rebel. How could I have been so blind? So utterly stupid? I asked him flat out about her and he denied having any involvement with her. He behaved as if they had no connection anymore.
But that’s not true, is it? If what Ransom is saying is true, she’s his boss. She oversees everything. Rebel answers to her. Christ, he’s been inside her. So when Rebel said that he hasn’t seen her in weeks, he was lying through his perfectly straight white teeth, wasn’t he? Or is it Ransom who’s lying?
The whole thing is so wildly dysfunctional and beyond comprehension, it leaves me reeling.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I ask, my fingers clamping down on the edge of the table so hard they whiten at the tips. I finally made my decision, but what if it was the wrong one?
“It wasn’t my place. You had a choice to make. What would it look like if I swooped in and started filling you in on his backstory?” he asks. “I would have looked like the jealous lover trying to tarnish his brother’s reputation so I could win you over. It would have been the equivalent of me shooting myself in the foot right before the race.” Folding his arms on the table, Ransom leans in, dipping his head so he can look me in the eye. “You needed to figure him out for yourself and make your decision on your own.”
I’m torn between being mad at him and understanding what he’s telling me. Assuming everything he’s said is true, I get why he didn’t want to be the bearer of bad news. The recipient almost always ends up getting pissed off at them and runs in the opposite direction, and I know enough about myself to say that I would have been stubborn enough to do just that. But I feel like such a fool now.
Drawing in a steeling breath, I sit up taller. “Why tell me now, then? Why wait? You saw them together that night. You could have told me then.” He could have saved me from this clawing heartache.
“I told you, I thought you’d made your choice. How was I supposed to know hours after climbing into my bed, you’d return to his?” He’s angry again, and I can’t say that I blame him. “You left me hanging for a solid week, Joe. You left me wondering if I did something wrong, if you just needed some time. Then I had to hear from my brother that it wasn’t me you wanted after all?” He shakes his head, and all I want to do is reach out to him. I can’t seem to do anything right lately.
“I didn’t intend to string you along. I just needed some time to sort everything out and make sure I knew what I wanted first. Then I had to figure out what to say and how to say it. I’ve had a lot on my mind this week,” I explain. “If Rebel hadn’t shown up at my apartment, I probably still wouldn’t have said anything to either of you.”
“So what if I had shown up at your apartment?” Ransom challenges. “Was this a first come first serve situation? Did I just miss my window?”
His words feel like a slap in the face. “You don’t have to be so vicious about this. This is hard for me, too.”
“Yeah, only because you just realized that you made a huge fucking mistake.” Standing, Ransom puts his glasses back in place, shutting me out. “You’ve made your decision, and I have to respect it. All I can tell you now is good luck with my brother. You’re going to need it.”
Finalizing his words, he walks away and I find myself staring out across the playground wondering what the hell I’m going to do next. I think I might have chosen wrong, and now everything is a wreck.
Dropping my head into my hands, I close my eyes and retreat into myself, until the sun begins to set and the sounds of children playing grow scarce. Then I pick myself up, dust myself off, and head for home.
FOURTEEN
I’m digging myself a hole. I haven’t drummed up the guts to confront Rebel yet. I don’t know what I’m waiting for, but every time I see him, I end up biting my tongue. I hate confrontation, and it’s impossible to stay angry with him when he’s being nothing but sweet to me.
How am I supposed to yell at someone whose smile is so perfect and endearing?
Hanging out at the club all night, Rebel watched me dance, and then he waited for me to finish working the floor and collect my tips before escorting me home. He stayed the night, ravishing my body and mind with his powerfully addictive hands and mouth until we were both too exhausted to keep our eyes open. He’s infusing my every waking moment with his presence so that all I can think about is him.
As soon as the sun came up this morning, he rolled out of bed and made us a hearty breakfast of blueberry pancakes and fresh squeezed orange juice. Now, we’re in the back of a limo driving to God knows where. All he’ll tell me is that I’ll find out when we get there and to sit back and relax.