I had my own bedroom, bathroom, and a place to put my belongings. The family of the handicapped man in the building hired me to assist him, and I was taking great pride in doing for him what had been done for me. Providing open arms, a kind heart, and exercising a little patience proved to provide me a feeling of satisfaction I had never felt.

I was making progress.

As I wandered through the house, and tried to find something that needed to be cleaned, Ethan walked in. I glanced at the clock on the wall, shocked he was home so early. It was 3:15, roughly two hours earlier than normal.

“You’re home early,” I said as I turned around to face him.

“Got off early. You busy?” he asked.

He wasn’t wearing his jacket, which I found odd. The evening ritual was for him to remove his jacket, walk to his room, and then get his one beer for the night.

I lifted the bottle of polish and pointed it at him as if it were a gun, “No, just looking for something to clean. Everything’s spotless.”

“That’s Cade for you,” he shrugged.

“Where’s your jacket?” I asked.

He tilted his head toward the door, “Left it at work. Let’s go shopping. We can run to the mall and get you a few things before you have to go back to work.”

“You mean like now?” I asked excitedly.

I had worked for two weeks, and saved every bit of the money. Cade had given me everything I needed as far as toiletries were concerned, and as much as I insisted, they wouldn’t accept any of my offerings for assistance in paying for groceries. The wages, along with the tips Trent had given me, totaled a little over two hundred dollars. Although I’d refused the previous offers to go shopping for fear of not being able to afford it, it now seemed possible after receiving my second payment. As much as I hated the thought of spending any of the money, buying new panties and maybe a pair of shorts was very exciting.

I rushed to the pantry, and put the rag and polish back where I found it, talking as I hurried past Ethan.

“Can we go to the mall and the DAV? I can get some new panties at the mall, and maybe a pair of really nice shorts at the DAV.”

“Sure,” he responded.

I ran from the pantry, past Ethan, and up to my bedroom. After pulling my hair into a ponytail, and grabbing my money, I rushed down the stairs and into the living room.

“Ready!” I squeaked as I raised my hands in the air.

Ethan shook his head and smiled, “Well, let’s do it.”

The ride to the mall was hot, but very refreshing. We rode up Douglas Avenue the entire way, and as always, traffic was minimal but consistent. As we slowly rode through College Hill, the smell of the spring flowers and freshly cut grass was enough to cause me to close my eyes and try to capture the scent with each breath. Riding on the back of the bike was more pleasurable than anything I had ever done, short of sex. As we pulled into the mall parking lot, the excitement was almost more than I could take.

“Guess when I was here last,” I said as I motioned toward the door.

Ethan shrugged his shoulders as he removed his glasses, “I don’t know.”

“I was sixteen. Christina’s mom brought us. I watched while they shopped. I didn’t come after that, it was depressing,” I sighed.

Although neither Ethan nor Cade had mentioned it, I knew the clothes I wore were nothing short of awful. With the exception of my black worker’s pants I had taken from a sack in the parking lot of the DAV, all of my other clothes were from high school. Over the years, items became ruined and were discarded. What I was left with was a small assortment of shirts, pants, two bras which I rarely wore, and a few pair of grotesque panties that I only wore when I felt I had to. The black pants were in good shape and didn’t show the two years of stains they’d acquired.

I had never seen myself as a dirty person, but since moving in with Ethan and Cade, I was beginning to realize I looked nothing short of awful when dressed. Now going into the mall looking like I just stepped off of a construction site, I held my head high and was filled with pride.

“Well, come on, we haven’t got all damned day,” Ethan said as he held the door open.

As he held the door with his left hand, his right hung at his side. It looked swollen and painful.

“What did you do to your hand, it looks swollen,” I asked.

“Smashed it at work,” he responded as he glanced down at it.

“It looks like it hurts,” I said over my shoulder as I walked inside.

“It’ll be fine,” he said flatly.

As we walked in front of Victoria’s Secret, I hesitated and stared in the shop. A sign in front of a huge display of panties said $10.50 or any 5 for $27.00. I turned toward Ethan, grinned, and glanced at the display.

“Well…” he said as he motioned inside, “They won’t bring them out here to you.”

I cautiously stepped inside as if they were going to reject me as soon as they saw me. The store smelled like I remembered Christina’s mother smelling. After approaching the display and gawking at the selection of panties, a skinny but curvaceous girl with black hair walked up and smiled. A clean, soft scent of flowers filled the air.

“How are we doing today?” she asked.

“Real well,” Ethan responded.

“Can I help you find anything?” she asked.

I shook my head.

“She’s found the panties, where are the bras?” Ethan asked.

“Right over there,” she said as she pointed to a display behind the one where we stood, “Do you know what size you need?”

“34 B,” I responded.

“Honey, I don’t think you’re a 34 anything. Have you been measured lately?” she asked.

Embarrassed, I shook my head.

“Hold on,” she said as she turned and walked away.

“I didn’t say I needed a bra,” I whispered.

“Well, I know you do. You never wear one. Just settle down, I’ll buy it for you, I want to,” Ethan whispered.

“You’re not buying me anything,” I whispered in response.

The black haired girl stepped between us with a fabric tape measure, “I’m Melanie, by the way. Now lift your arms.”

As I lifted my arms, she wrapped the tape measure around me.

“Okay, lower them,” she said.

After measuring me in three different places, she grinned.

“See?” she said as draped the tape measure over her neck.

“32 DD,” she grinned.

“Huh?” I shrugged.

“It happens all the time. Honey, you’re tiny, but your boobs aren’t. Try one of the 32DD’s, you’ll be surprised what it feels like to have a bra that actually fits,” she said.

I smiled and arched my back, “Okay.”

“Let me know if you need any help,” she said as she turned away.

I turned toward Ethan and cupped my hand beside my mouth, “I have big titties.”

He blinked his eyes and licked his lips playfully, “I know.”

After picking out five pairs of panties and a bra, Ethan and I walked to the dressing room. I felt special. To be honest, I was as excited as I could ever remember being in my entire life. I’m sure to most women, panties and bras are not perceived as a huge deal. To me, and for the last five years, they were something beyond my financial reach. Finding it odd how something so simple could become so exciting, I offered Ethan into the dressing room to share my excitement.

“I’m sorry, but he can’t go in with you, store policy,” the woman standing at the end of the row of dressing rooms said.

“But I want him to see them,” I sighed.

She looked both directions, leaned toward me, and whispered, “I tell you what. Try them on, and when you’re done, he can peek in the door, okay? Use this room.”

She unlocked the room at the end of the row of doors, across from the chair I suspected she wanted Ethan to sit in. I turned toward Ethan, shrugged my shoulders, and stepped into the room. After taking off my pants and pulling on the panties, I hung my tee shirt on the hook and pulled the bra on. It was soft against my skin, felt very supportive, but wasn’t binding in any way. I exhaled and looked in the mirror. Standing barefoot in a new pair of purple panties and a black bra, I looked better than I remember ever looking.