I turned and walked away from the one person I would always love…. but never be able to have.

CHAPTER THIRTY ONE

A ri……

The moment Jeff turned and walked away I wanted to go after him. Oh god…I just wanted to shout out MOTHER FUCKER as loud as I could! I didn’t want to draw attention to myself so I just stood there because you know……. standing in the middle of their backyard with tears running down my face was not going to draw any attention.

FUCK ME!

Oh holy hells bells….the way he was holding me so close during that song….I knew the moment he asked me to dance what he was trying to do. It was his way of saying he was sorry.

I’m so sorry I hurt you baby……… Baby I could never hate you ……

I have waited eight fucking years for this…….eight years for him to call me something other than squirt, to hold me like he never wanted to let me go. Son of a fucking bitch!

Oh.my.god. I just fucked up everything……I looked over at Ellie who was now getting off of Gunner’s lap and walking over to me.

“OH MY GOD Ari what did he say to you? I’ll kill him for making you cry again that bastard!” Ellie shouted as she looked back towards the door Jeff just walked through.

I started to laugh. Why I have no idea….I found none of this shit funny. Ellie looked at me confused as hell.

“Ari what the hell is going on?”

“Oh nothing Ells….you know……Jeff just did the most fucking romantic thing anyone has ever done for me…..and I blew it. I fucking blew something I’ve been wanting for so long.” I started to cry again. GODDAMN it….the second time I have been to one of their parties and I am crying! JESUS MARY AND JOSEPH!

“Come on let’s go sit on the front porch…..” Ellie said as she turned to Gunner and pointed to the front of the house. Gunner looked concerned but just nodded his head like he understood.

“He is in the house…I can’t let him see me crying Ells.” I said as I panicked at the idea of seeing Jeff right that second.

“We will walk through the gate okay?” Ellie linked her arm with mine and we walked to the front porch.

After I told her what Jeff said to me and how I told him the truth about Jason, she just sat back in the swing.

“Ari, clearly Jeff has feelings for you sweets. You have to see that right. Why didn’t you go after him?”

“I don’t know why I didn’t Ellie. I mean it’s like he wants to be with me but he doesn’t. I don’t know how else to explain it….I feel like he is attracted to me but he does nothing to act on it. Maybe he just can’t see me as anything more than his little sisters best friend Squirt. He even called me squirt before he turned and walked away. It killed me when he said that it worked……that me trying to hurt him worked.”

“Well of course it worked. You had to know when you told him he would be upset. Give him time Ari. Maybe he just needs time to get use to the idea of you being something other than my best friend. What you need to do is show him that is not all you are. You are more than Arianna…Ellie’s best friend….You are more than just Squirt………You need to make him want you Ari….want you bad! You need to show him how much he wants to be with you!”

Ellie said with a wicked smile on her face. We both started to laugh. Only Ellie could make me feel better when I felt like shit.

“Okay I have other news! So while you were dancing, Gunner asked if we both wanted to go to his grandparent’s ranch next week for a few days. I SO want to go but I need you to go with me. Please say you will go!”

Ellie was so fucking cute when she begged! “Of course I’ll go with you. Is um…..Jeff going?”

Ellie smiled that big ole smile of hers. ”You bet he’s going! Five full days of us in the country with two really good looking guys and the Llano River runs right through it…..I’m thinking Jeff might need to see you in your red bikini! ”

“Well, when you put it that way…count me the fuck in!”

We both started laughing so hard we couldn’t stop. So Ellie thought I should go after Jeff huh? I think I was up for that challenge! Just then the front door opened…….. speak of the devil……it was Jeff.

He opened the door all the way and stepped outside. “Is everything okay? Why are y’all sitting out here?”

“Well, we were just talking about how much we were looking forward to heading out to the country with you and Gunner.” I said as I got up and walked towards Jeff.

Now it was his turn to be stunned. I walked up to him and leaned in so he had to bend down towards me to hear what I was about to say.

“I can’t decide if I want to bring my red bikini or my white one? I might just have to bring both. What do you think Jeff?”

He looked like he was having a really hard time swallowing and if I didn’t know any better I would say that Mr. Big football player was blushing. Oh yes…I liked Ellie’s plan I thought as I let a smile play across my face.

Game on Jeff………….

CHAPTER THIRTY TWO

G unner……

Things must be okay with Ari because Ellie and Ari came through the front door giggling like school girls. Jeff was walking behind them and looked at me and just shrugged. I was standing in the kitchen talking to Brad and Amanda. I looked back up and saw Jon walking over to Ari and Ellie. What was that fucker up to? I watched as he put his hand on Ellie’s arm. I immediately saw her tense up.

I couldn’t tell what they were talking about but Ellie kept shaking her head no but held a polite smile on her face. He then leaned down closer to the side of her face and said something that made her laugh.

“Dude, are you even listening to me?” Brad said as he pushed my shoulder back. I tore my eyes away from Ellie and Jon and looked at Brad.

“Oh yeah sorry I was distracted by something.” I said as I looked back over to towards Ellie. Jon was clearly up to something that fucker.

“Listen Gunner, you better keep an eye on Jonathon Barker. That fucker is a man whore. Once he sees something he wants he won’t stop at anything until he gets it in his bed.” Brad said as he stared over at Jon and Ellie.

“I know all about Jon but thanks for the warning Brad. Looks like he has his eyes on the one thing that he will not be taking to bed so if you will excuse me Amanda, Brad….I have a girl to save.” I said as I started to walk over towards Ellie.

I felt the heat moving up my body the more I watched him try to move closer and closer to her. I noticed Ellie take a step backwards away from Jon. I was already fisting my hands up so I needed to get a grip. When I walked up behind him I heard what he was saying.

“I really wish you would change your mind my dear and dance with me. I would really love to get to know you better.”

Mother fucker…..in my own fucking house going after my girl, oh hell no. I looked over at Jeff and gave him a nod….if I lost it he better be fucking ready to pull me the hell off of this prick. Jeff was on his way over and walked up to Ari and whispered something in her ear. Jon didn’t even notice Jeff walk up.

“Hey sweetheart, are you ready for that dance?” I never took my eyes off of Ellie for one second the entire time I walked over to where they were standing. Ellie had seen me walking over and gave me the smile I would move heaven and earth to see every second of the damn day.

I slapped Jon on the back….hard…..causing his beer to spill a little onto the hard wood floor. He looked pissed but once he saw it was me he relaxed. Fucker better not think I’m harmless because I will break him in two.

Ellie tried to hide her giggle. “I’m more than ready for that dance!” Ellie said with a smile.