“Uh…sure,” Phillip responds.
That should work out just fine, I think.
“So can we order now?”
“Um, well, we need to run downstairs real quick first.”
I give him my dejected look.
He sighs big at me and gives me a is your stomach all you ever think about look. “Just quick and then we'll eat, I promise.”
He drags me out of the booth and down to the mezzanine level.
Now normally, I would ask a million questions about where we are going that's so freaking important, why we can't at least eat first, stuff like that.
But what can I say?
I'm still a bit dazed by the ring, but I'm also seriously dazed by, well, everything!
All of it! The roses, the dress, the spa, the limo, the charms, the ring. He really put a lot of thought into this. And I'm starting to grasp the fact that he's loved me for a long time.
Why didn't I ever see that?
Maybe I'm the one that's not so perceptive.
Phillip leads me into a ballroom.
There are people mingling and talking and a band that looks like it's getting ready to start playing.
“This is the fundraiser my parents are at,” Phillip tells me, while scanning the room.
So much for not telling anyone. I'll have to stress that this is just between us, and that we will tell people in our own sweet time.
As I look for his parents in the crowd, I'm surprised to see a few people I know. Like a couple of the girls from Phillip's office.
Hmm, maybe this is a fundraiser that Mr. Mac's company is hosting or something.
But then over in the corner, I spot our friends, Brandon and Neil...wait a minute.
“Hey Phillip, Brandon and Neil are over there. Why are they at this party?”
He ignores my question and points, “Hey, there's Mom and Dad.”
But when I see Katie and Eric, I know something is going on.
Why are all these people I know at this fundraiser?
Katie is not the fundraiser type.
And what fund is it for anyway?
Why isn't there a sign?
Finally I say, “Phillip, what the hell is going on here?”
He looks at me with a huge grin, holds up his hands, and happily says, “Sur-prise! This is our engagement party.”
I blink, hard.
What? You've GOT to be kidding me.
This is keeping things QUIET?
I stand there and stare at him, dumbfounded. I'm sure my mouth is hanging wide open. The boy is nuts.
“Excuse me? You were so confident that I would agree to marry you on our first date that you planned a surprise engagement party?”
“Well, not just me,” he grins proudly, as he takes my hand. “My family helped a ton and Danny and Lori too.” He is so excited about this.
WHO is this man?
He has taken on some alter ego, and I don't like it one bit!
Phillip kisses me quickly and says, “Let's go up on stage, thank everyone for coming, and tell them it's official! Now we can party!”
I look at the stranger standing in front of me and pull my hand out of his, with as much force as I can muster.
“You arrogant son of a bitch,” I say.
Well, maybe I growl it. It's hard to say for certain. But I can tell you this. I am fuming, smoke flying out of my ears, mad as I take the engagement ring off my finger, shove it into Phillip's hand, and march toward the stage. The march to the stage feels like it takes forever because there are a million thoughts running through my mind.
Did all these people come here because they really thought I'd say yes?
Or did they come for the fireworks of me saying no?
Do they wish us well?
Or hope to see us fail?
I reach the stage and tentatively walk out on it. One of the band members hands me a microphone, and I know I really need to say something to all these people.
Phillip and JJ sitting in a tree, K I S S I N G.
Great! Now I'm having flashbacks to when I was ten. As I survey the crowd, I see many of the friends who tortured me with those songs, except they're all grown up now. Well, sort of grown up, I half expect them to break out in song. Unfortunately, they are just standing there, staring at me.
I may die of embarrassment.
Actually, I wish it were possible to die of embarrassment then I could drop dead, and I wouldn't have to do what I am about to do.
Part of me wonders how in the world I got here to begin with. Phillip and I have been friends for a really long time and, all of a week ago, decided to have a real relationship, as opposed to the totally platonic one we've always had.
And well, it has been really incredible.
I mean, Phillip is incredible in ways I hadn't even imagined!
Okay, so I might have imagined a little.
Anyway, as of about 6 minutes ago, we were out on a romantic first date.
Then he had to go and blow the whole thing all to hell by asking me to marry him.
Can you believe that?
Me neither.
And if it isn't unbelievable enough that he asked me to marry him on our first date, he was so damned sure I'd say yes, he planned this huge, surprise engagement party.
Tonight. On our first date. Like, right now!
On stage, I shudder and mentally prepare myself for what I am about to do. I have to tell everyone who came here tonight that there is NO WAY I'm going to marry that boy!
I put the microphone up to my mouth and say, “Well it took me a little while, but I finally figured out this isn't a fund raiser.”
Laughter all around me.
“Now, I know you all came here tonight expecting to surprise me with an engagement party.” I pause for a minute. “Well, at least we got the surprised part right.” I chuckle.
Oh, I'm failing miserably up here. Just do it, JJ, get it over with.
“Actually, Phillip did ask me to marry him tonight. And I have to tell you all that, well, I said NO.”
The crowd sighs. I glance over at Phillip's mom. She looks like she's going to faint, but I continue. I'm in too deep to stop now.
“I told him that it's crazy. That this is our first real date, and God, what would people think?”
I try not to look at Phillip, but I do. He's standing very still, staring at my perfect ring, probably wondering how his magical plan went so astray.
But I go on, “So he told me he loves me, that he has always loved me and who cares what people think anyway? But I'm thinking, I do. So I say NO again.”
The crowd goes, aaahhh, and then is silent.
What am I doing? If I say no tonight will Phillip still date me, or will he give up on me forever? And what in the world would I do without him?
Just as my life about blows up in my face, I spot Danny and Lori in the crowd and something very important clicks in the back of my mind. I flashback to the conversation Phillip and I had after their engagement.
He asked me if I'd ever want to be surprised in front of a whole bunch of people.
Didn't he?
And I told him yes.
Didn't I?
Because I thought it would be so cool to know a guy planned all of it for me.
MY GOD, I asked for this!
He did it all for me.
ALL OF IT .
The spa, the dress, the limo, the charms, the ring, the party. He did it because it's what he thought I wanted.
I look at Phillip again and melt. He's still my Phillip, my handsome prince. He still loves football, and cars, and darts and well, me.
So I decide.
For good this time.
What's my mantra?
Say it with me now!
What the hell!!!!