My thumbs slid over her cheeks and I asked the more direct question. The one that maybe she’d been waiting for, given how she’d dealt with her emotions the past three years. “What do you need?”

In response, she closed her eyes and let out a whimper. Her hips thrust forward against mine and my dick immediately responded.

Then I felt her fingernail trail up the back of my neck, and she fisted my hair tightly in her grasp, which only lit a fire inside my chest. I realized just how fucking much I wanted her in that moment.

Except, she didn’t want me in the same way. She just wanted the idea of me. She wanted the escape I could give her. And given my history with the female population, she probably thought I knew damn well how to deliver it to her.

Sure, after downing those two shots she probably wasn’t thinking too clearly. But neither was I, because she was touching me and her hands were warm and her sounds were sexy and her eyes told me she needed me. Just for tonight.

And I’d give her whatever the hell she wanted, even if I had to forget it ever happened tomorrow. I’d do that for her. And suffer the consequences.

Before I could reason any further, she brought her other hand up and stroked the pad of her thumb across the flesh of my bottom lip. I let out a soft growl and flattened my body against hers.

Her back angled above the lip of the bar, and I positioned my groin against her smooth center as she spread her knees to adjust. And, shit, being this close to her was amazing. Fucking unbelievable. To smell her soft scent and hear the heightened arousal in her harsh breaths.

A moan tumbled from her lips and her nipples pebbled through the thin material of her shirt. I flicked my tongue along her jaw to her ear and mumbled, “Is this what you wanted?”

“Yes.” She panted out a breath, and then opened her eyes to look at me. Her pupils were clear. So damn clear in that moment. “Please.”

No question about it. I was so fucked.

Chapter Five Rachel

My entire body was thrumming with carnal lust and the need to escape into someone else, the way I usually did these days. This was so damn wrong, but something about it felt so fucking right. More right than any of my past conquests had ever felt.

Maybe because this was Kai and he was familiar to me—and so different from all of the other guys. He smelled unbelievable—like a mix of pine and spice—and even the hint of weed was working for me, surprising enough. Maybe I was getting a contact buzz. God knows I’d lost my brain cells somewhere back at that party.

His biceps were bulging beneath his T-shirt, strands of his hair were coming loose from his elastic tie, and he looked beyond sexy.

I figured he knew how to be with all kinds of girls. Hell, I’d seen him with tons of girls over the years. So maybe he would know how to be with me. Just this once.

In the back of my foggy brain I knew this might change us. Would change us. Unless we both took it for what it was. We were both good at this sort of meaningless hookup, weren’t we?

As my back scraped against the bar and I felt his body mold to mine, I lost all lucid thought. My thighs were spread wide to accommodate him and I was desperate for release. To feel his rough hands on me. To taste his tongue in my mouth.

Why hadn’t he just left me alone? I could’ve been screwing somebody else’s brains out by now—someone from the local bar. Yeah, even though everyone around here knew me, and word would probably spread fast if someone saw me leaving that pub.

But Kai wouldn’t tell anyone if we were together tonight.

What do you need, he had asked—it was like he knew me. Saw inside me. I’d shaken my head as if I didn’t know, but the truth was that I had been too ashamed to admit it. I needed a warm body. I needed his warm body.

His eyes were hooded and filled with so much desire that I almost wanted to look away from the truth hidden inside them. He studied my mouth, corner to corner, and then slid his gaze up to meet mine. A fireworks display of yearning exploded inside me.

“I know he left you,” Kai said with a gravelly voice that was like fingernails sliding up my bare skin. I could hardly focus on the meaning behind the words. His head bent forward, his mouth finding my ear. “But look at you now. Strong. Confident. Gorgeous.”

“You left me, too.” I didn’t even know where the words had come from. From somewhere deep inside my body. Deep inside my soul.

He braced his arms against the bar and flicked his penetrating gaze to my eyes.

“Is that what you believe?” As if on cue, tears began to pool behind my eyes again.

“I . . . I don’t know.” I shook my head. Why had I said that? Maybe I had always wanted him to know. That I had needed him to stay. “Ye . . . yes.”

“Fuck, Rach.” His voice sounded tortured as he grabbed on to the back of my head and tugged me closer to him. “I never left you. Never.”

Kai’s warm heat was wrapped around me. His heady scent was potent now—soap and spice, and all man. It made my brain all kinds of fuzzy.

My lips skimmed along his neck, and I pinned his earlobe between my teeth. “Show me, Kai. Show me that you didn’t leave me.”

A low groan escaped his mouth right before his fingers tunneled deeper through my hair, the pads of his thumbs mapping patterns against the hollow of my throat.

His mouth hovered close to mine. So damn close that I could feel the current running between our lips, like a magnetic force drawing us together.

I could see him deliberating—his midnight eyes were deep pools of wonder and lust and heat, and I wanted to swim in them, get lost in them tonight.

Kai’s lips brushed mine—a barely-there kiss—and the hairs on my arms stood at attention.

His mouth was soft and his lips tender as he applied gentle pressure again. I closed my eyes and hummed from the sensation.

“Rachel,” he whispered, and my entire body erupted into flames.

My tongue flitted out and skimmed his lower lip.

“Goddamn.” His lips became harder, more insistent, as if he were attempting to brand me. His tongue slashed past my lips and entered my mouth—hot, wet, and demanding. His tongue ring scraped over my teeth, acting like a tuning fork inside my body.

The metal ball swiped against my tongue, teeth, and the roof of my mouth, creating a sensation I’d never felt before. I was beyond turned on. Ready to combust.

I let out a long moan that only urged him on. He bit my bottom lip, swiped the tip of his tongue across the sensitive skin there and then moved on to my jawline, taking pieces of me as he went.

His hips thrust forward and I wrapped my legs around his waist, allowing our hot centers to collide. We were all lips and teeth and heavy breathing as we devoured each other. His tongue licked and tangled with mine as he tugged at my hair, making me even more frantic for him.

Never had I kissed someone like this before. Sure, there had been horny and sloppy make-out sessions with guys. This was altogether something different. We were pouring ourselves into each other. Like we were filling each other up before becoming empty again.

And Kai. God, Kai.

He was kissing me like he needed to memorize my lips, my tongue, and my taste.

My tears continued to fall along my cheeks not only because I was sad and confused from earlier, but also because what I was experiencing in this moment with Kai was mind-boggling. Startling. Fucking incredible. Too strong for words.

I never wanted it to end. I wanted him to fill all of me. To consume me. To make his way inside of me.

My fingers reached out and clutched him through the front of his jeans. He was hard and huge and ready in my grasp. He ripped his mouth away from mine and hissed through his teeth.