“I think this conversation is over.”

“If you say so.” He rose up, his smile far from friendly. “One more thing, though. You wouldn’t be encouraging Stryker to pursue his parents’ case, would you?”

“Why wouldn’t I, if it could get him some closure?”

“It’s not always what people need. Think about it. That kid hung out with some bad people. If you want to help him, you might persuade him to let things go. You never know what kind of skeletons he might dig up.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You think it’s any coincidence that you come along and all of a sudden Stryker’s looking to clean up his act? He was with a suspected drug dealer the night his parents were killed. Draw your own conclusions.”

I stared at him in open incredulity. This was new information and I wasn’t sure I should trust it.

“You look awfully shocked, Miss Page. Do you even know who you’re spending all your time with? The kinds of things Stryker has done?”

I didn’t have a chance to ask any further questions. Officer Cross stepped away from the door just as Hayden approached. “One last word before you head home, Mr. Stryker.”

Hayden didn’t acknowledge that Cross had spoken. Instead, he knelt down in front of me and ran his hands down my arms. He dropped the key in my palm and folded my fingers around it.

“Christ, you’re freezing.” He shot Officer Cross an irritated glare, then dropped a soft kiss on my lips. “Turn on the car, kitten.”

While I tucked my legs inside, Hayden rolled up the window and closed the door. I slid the key into the ignition, and the engine started with a deep rumble. I pulled my legs up to my chest, conserving body heat. I’d been so distressed when Officer Cross put Hayden in his cruiser, the cold hadn’t registered. It did now. I flexed my frozen toes.

After a brief, tight exchange between Hayden and Officer Cross, Hayden rounded the car and got in. He was silent in his fury as he shifted into gear and pulled onto the street.

“Please tell me you’re okay,” he asked in a pained voice.

“I’m okay,” I replied, though I wasn’t entirely sure it was true.

He glanced at me as if maybe he didn’t believe me, either. “What did he say to you?”

“He kept asking what happened to the hood.”

“Did you tell him?” Hayden’s hands tightened on the steering wheel.

“I didn’t have to. He already seemed to know,” I said, keeping my tone neutral. I didn’t trust how calm he was. “It’s okay, Hayden. It’s fine. We’re fine.”

“No. It’s not.”

We stopped at a light and I could feel his eyes on me. He could always see right through my half-truths.

“What else did he say?”

I didn’t answer right away, concerned honesty would cause more harm.

“What did he say, Tenley? He must have said something; that cocksucker can’t resist stringing me up whenever he has the chance.”

“That you might have been with a drug dealer the night your parents died.”

“Why the fuck would he tell you that?”

Tonight had gone wrong on so many levels for both of us. “I don’t know, but I would never believe anything he said.”

“It’s true,” Hayden said flatly.

I sat there, stunned.

“I was with this guy named Damen, who ran a tattoo shop and dealt on the side. I didn’t know how extensive his side business was until later, after I went to work for him. He was the one who introduced me to coke, and to Sienna.”

“Oh, Hayden. I’m so sorry.” No wonder he was so reluctant to talk about his past, when there were so many painful pieces.

“You shouldn’t be. I’m the one who fucked up my own life.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” I said, but I knew he still blamed himself for what happened all those years ago.

The rest of the drive home was tense. I asked him if he was okay a couple of times, but he didn’t respond.

When we pulled into his spot in the parking garage, he shut off the car, then just stared straight ahead with his hands on the wheel.

I put a hand on his forearm. “Should we go up?”

He nodded and scrubbed his face with his palms. His shoulders curved in and he folded forward, his forehead coming to rest on the steering wheel. I put my hand on his back, feeling the muscles expand as he took long, slow breaths, his control slipping. A choked noise escaped, sounding like a stifled sob.

“Hayden? It’s okay. We’re home now.”

I unfastened my seat belt, reaching over to do the same for him. Whatever had happened in that police car had rattled him.

His seat belt undone, I removed the keys from the ignition and got out of the car, then went around to open his door. I stroked his hair, but he didn’t move. He just murmured something I didn’t catch. I dropped down beside him, ignoring the cold cement against my stocking feet. He spoke again, repeating a phrase over and over.

“Oh, Hayden. No.” My nose grazed his cheek.

He lifted his head from the steering wheel. His eyes were bloodshot and red-rimmed, but there were no tears. “I’m so fucked up,” he whispered. “I’m such a fuckup.”

“No, baby, that’s not true.” I placed my palm against his cheek.

“Yes, it is. Look what I did to you tonight. Look at you.” He skimmed a thumb under the hollow of my eye, then over my lip, brushing over the tender spot where his viper bites had cut in. “You’re so beautiful, and I’m ruining you.”

“You’re not ruining me. Why would you think that?”

“I wish I wasn’t so fucked up,” he said, as if I hadn’t spoken.

His vacant stare unnerved me. I’d never seen him like this. Hayden could get upset, he could get angry, but I didn’t know how to handle his falling apart like this. He’d always been the one to keep me together.

“Why don’t we go up and feed TK? She’ll have missed us today.” I wanted to get him out of the car. Also, it was the only thing I could think of that might pull him out of his downward spiral. He was like a parent when it came to her.

“Yeah. Okay.” He nodded robotically and let me help him out of the car.

The presents in the backseat could stay there until morning. I locked the car and led him to the elevator. He folded himself around me while we waited, burying his face in my hair. When the doors opened, I pulled him in and hit the button for the second floor. I felt no anxiety as we ascended, my concern fixed on Hayden. I unlocked the door to his place and led him inside. When I turned to lock the door behind us, he seemed to snap out of it a little.

“I ruined your coat,” he said hoarsely.

“What?” I looked over my shoulder, taking in the forlorn expression on his pale face.

“Your coat. I ruined it too.”

He helped me out of it and draped it over his arm. The soft cream fabric was smeared with dirt. The buckle in the middle of the back had black powder on it, which explained the scratches in the hood. I took it from him and hung it in the closet.

“Once it’s dry-cleaned it’ll be good as new.”

TK came bounding down the hall, her excited mews stopping only when she skidded into Hayden’s ankle and he scooped her up. She rubbed her nose on his chin. Then he walked down the hall with his shoes still on. On autopilot he fed TK, then stood in the kitchen staring at his feet in confusion. I guided him back to the front hall and knelt in front of him. With a little prompting he lifted one foot, then the other, as I removed his shoes and put them away.

“Why don’t I run a bath?” I suggested.

It took him a few seconds to answer. “For me?”

“For both of us.”

“Okay. I don’t want to be alone right now.”

“Then it’s good that I’m not going anywhere.”

I took his hand and he shuffled down the hall beside me, fingers wrapped tightly around mine. Hayden sat on the edge of the tub while I ran the water. I searched his cupboards for bath salts but came up empty-handed. His eyes stayed on my face as I loosened his tie and slipped it over his head. Next I unbuttoned his shirt, saving the cuff links until last. They were little sliver skulls.