“No,” Jake lied.
Then again, Ethan didn’t screw up.
Jake did.
Ethan’s face was even worse when he asked, “Is what I did why Josie didn’t pick me up from school today?”
“No, bud,” Jake said firmly.
Another lie.
Fuck.
“Just want you to be cool about that kind of thing,” he went on. “You get me?”
“Yeah, Dad.”
“Thanks, Eath,” Jake muttered. “You can go back to your game,” he told him before turning to walk away.
Ethan caught him by calling his name and Jake turned back.
“Where is Josie?” he asked, watching his father closely.
“She’s got some shit to do.” Probably not a lie. “She’ll be back, son.” Fuck, he hoped that wasn’t a lie.
Ethan studied him a moment before he murmured, “Cool,” and turned back to the game.
Jake walked away from his door thinking things were not cool. Not by a long shot.
Fuck, he’d fucked up.
And he had to fix it.
But he figured Josie needed time.
She had the night.
Then, tomorrow, he’d go to his woman and he hoped like fuck he could make things “cool.”
* * * * *
The next morning, Jake heard high-heeled shoes on his wood floors in the gym and his head whipped around just as his heart thumped in his chest.
He straightened away from his desk, clenching his teeth when he saw Alyssa.
No.
Strike that.
He saw Alyssa fit to be tied.
She made a beeline to his office, her eyes never leaving him, his never leaving her and the instant she cleared the door, he stated, “Alyssa, don’t got the time.”
She slammed the door, crossed her arms on her chest and returned, “Make the time.”
“Woman—” he started but she cut him off.
“Josie stood me up for lunch yesterday.”
Jake sighed, leaned against his desk and curled his fingers around the edge of it.
But he said nothing.
“Called her all day. Finally got through to her late last night. She said things have changed. She’s putting Lavender House on the market. Takin’ some job with some designer in New York City and leavin’ the first chance she gets.”
His heart again thumped in his chest. This time so hard it fucking hurt.
“What happened?” she asked.
He finally spoke. “See you think Josie made this your business. But it isn’t.”
“You’re wrong. She’s my friend. She’s a good friend. I care. And outside of her grandmother, you’re the only good thing she’s had in her life and she knows it. Now she’s leaving?” she asked then went on before she got an answer. “Why?”
“I’m gonna sort it out,” he assured her.
“Well, hurry, Jake,” she shot back. “Because she didn’t sound right. She sounded all cold and haughty and she’s got that uppity thing workin’ for her in her way but this wasn’t that. She was cold as fucking ice.”
That was not good.
Fuck.
Alyssa was not done.
“You’ve had three women slip through your fingers, Jake. They were slippery and not worth the effort of holdin’ on. Now you got one who is. Since that’s the case and you know it, don’t know why you’re in your goddamned office doin’ whatever-the-fuck you’re doin’.” She threw out an arm. “But I’d get the lead out, babe. You don’t, she’ll slide away.”
“Respect, Alyssa,” he said low. “You know you got that from me. But you gotta back off and let me and Josie work this shit out.”
She held his eyes a beat before she leaned in and whispered, “Hurry.”
And with that, she turned, threw open the door and stomped out.
Jake watched her go.
Then he grabbed his keys from the desk, walked into the gym and called out to Troy who was at a speed bag. “Gotta go do something. Text me, you leave and no one’s here.”
“Got it,” Troy replied, his eyes never leaving the bag, his gloves constantly moving.
Jake went straight to his truck.
Then he went straight to Lavender House.
He did this thinking about his kids last night. The questions. The confusion. The unease. Josie had been with them every night for weeks. Now, she was gone.
They didn’t like it.
They were freaked by it.
And he had no good reason to give them why she was.
Except he was a fucking moron. But he didn’t share that with his kids.
He should have told her, straight up, from the beginning.
And when he didn’t, when he saw her with those goddamned letters, he should have come clean.
He didn’t.
And he didn’t because he was an idiot. He didn’t because of pride. He didn’t because he didn’t ever want to lose that look in her eyes she gave him just half an hour before, her in his bed, her hair down and mussed, his cum still inside her.
Contentment.
Safety.
Happiness.
Love.
When she knew, it would be like when your kid first finds out you can’t make miracles.
Like when your daughter’s grandmother dies and you can’t bring her back and she knows you want to heal every hurt and thinks you can move mountains to do that. And when she figures out you can’t, you still have her love, you still have her heart, but you’ve lost something precious. What you’ve lost is that understanding that runs deep that you can do everything.
And when you want to give her everything, seeing it in her eyes she knows you can’t fucking kills.
He wanted more time to have that from Josie.
He should have just told her.
Now, he was going to tell her.
And thank fuck, he could do that, he saw as he drove up the lane to Lavender House and her Cayenne was parked out front.
She had several out buildings, one of them being a garage that looked like it was built the year the Model A rolled out. It needed to be fixed up, a decent door put in so Josie could park in there. Especially since the weather was going to get worse.
Or it needed to be knocked down and something built onto the house so she didn’t have to walk outside at all.
He’d discuss that with her and deal with it later.
After he got this shit done.
He got out, went to the door and turned the knob.
He stared down at it when he found it was locked.
He then hit the doorbell as he found the key on his ring.
He stared down at the lock when his key didn’t fit.
Jesus.
Was she so far gone she’d change the locks?
He hit the doorbell again and knocked.
No sound came from inside, not that that thick wood door would let any out.
He again tried the key.
No go.
“Jesus,” he whispered out loud this time, hitting the doorbell again.
Nothing.
He pulled out his phone and called her.
He got voicemail.
“Fuck,” he muttered, disconnecting, his heart again thumping in his chest. He moved around the house, trying the key in each lock and looking in windows.
She’d changed the locks on all the doors and was nowhere to be seen.
At the back, he moved beyond the greenhouse and took in the landscape. The sea. The arbor. The empty garden.
He turned and looked up at the house.
He saw her in the light room.
She was in the window seat staring down at him and he began to lift a hand but went solid when he watched her stand up, turn away and disappear.
“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me,” Jake whispered but moved swiftly to the greenhouse, trying the door he knew was locked and looking through.
She didn’t appear in the kitchen.
She didn’t appear in the family room when he walked by.
Or the living room.
Or at the front door when he went back to it and hammered.
Jake hit her number on his phone and when he got voicemail, his chest was burning and his jaw was tight.
“Baby, call me. We got shit to talk about. I’m drivin’ away now, givin’ you time. Tomorrow, we’ll meet at The Shack for an omelet. Nine o’clock.” He drew in breath and finished, “Kids miss you, Slick, and so do I.”
He disconnected, moved into the lane and looked back up at Lydie’s house. Josie’s house.