“Have you thought more about what I asked you the other day?” Cain asked pulling back to look into my eyes.
“Yes, but I still think I will keep my apartment,” I said turning him down yet again.
Cain was also moving to Huntsville. He would be working at one of his family’s firms in town. He had asked me to move in with him, but I wasn’t ready to do that. It just didn’t seem right so I politely declined. I felt bad for telling him no but in truth I wasn’t ready for that level of commitment. I liked how things were going and I wanted to keep things the same.
“I hope that doesn’t mean you won’t ever move in with me,” he said frowning.
“No it doesn’t mean I will never move in, it just means not now,” I countered.
He handed me my glass of wine and grabbed his as well. “Maybe when I ask you to marry me you will agree.”
I nearly spit my wine out that I was sipping. Damn, him. He always liked to catch me off-guard with comments like that. “Marry you?” I shot him a questioning look.
He moved closer to me again. “Yes Jenna, one day I am going to ask you to marry me and you are going to say yes, making me the happiest man on the planet.”
“I am?” I squeaked out.
“Yes. I love you, Jenna Middleton,” he said kissing me lightly. He leaned his forehead against mine staring deep into my eyes. “Don’t you love me?”
“Yes of course I do,” I said closing my eyes tightly.
I wanted to love Cain Stratford. I truly wanted nothing more; but for some inexplicable reason all I could hear in that moment was Jamieson’s voice in my head telling me he missed me. I knew before then of course that he had ruined me. I knew the first time Cain and I had sex. The entire time I compared him to Jamieson. I knew it wasn’t fair but I couldn’t help it, Jamieson had left his mark on me. My only hope now was to just try to ignore it and move on. I tried my best not to crave what was gone but I feared I always would.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
“You ready to go?” Jamieson asked watching our friends dance on the stage at Gossips.
“Yes,” I told him eagerly.
He held out his hand and I took it, threading my fingers with his. We walked hand in hand through the crowd of tightly packed people. I didn’t see her coming but I felt Jamieson stiffen beside me.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
I didn’t understand what he was apologizing for until I looked up and saw a very pissed of Trinity storming towards us.
“Really Jamieson? Really? You have to be fucking kidding me right now,” she spat out.
“What do you want, Trinity?” he asked in a cold tone.
“How could you do this?” she demanded refusing to answer his question.
“Do what Trinity?” he growled.
“This! Her!” she screeched and pointed at me.
“Trinity…” he said her name in frustration, tucking me behind him.
“Are you sleeping with her? Please tell me you’re not,” she yelled back at him.
Jamieson sighed, exasperated with her.
“I could only be so fucking lucky,” he told her simply and began walking again pulling me with him.
We made it to the parking lot and I didn’t say a word. I didn’t really know how to feel after seeing Trinity’s reaction to us being together.
“I’m sorry,” he said again opening the door to his truck for me.
“It’s okay.” I gave him a grim half smile.
He shut the door and climbed in the driver side starting the truck. “It’s not okay, Jenna. I have screwed everything up so badly.”
I felt bad for him. I knew I really had no reason to. He had created all of this. He was the reason why Trinity had the feelings she did and he the reason I had been literally broken in two for the past five years. But regardless my heart sank for him.
“It’s going to be okay,” I said covering his hand with mine.
He briefly looked down at our joined hands while driving and let out a steadying breath. “I don’t deserve your understanding or sympathy.”
“I know that.” I gave him a small smile.
He gave me the tiniest of smiles back and continued to drive us home.
It didn’t take long before the rest of our friends made their noisy entrance. I had retreated to my bedroom to change into my pajamas and I assumed Jamieson had gone to his room as well. I could tell he needed some space after what happened at the bar. He needed to think and frankly, so did I.
“Jenna, get down here and party with us!” Livy called from downstairs.
I obliged and joined my friends in the kitchen. To my surprise, Jamieson was also downstairs. He was sitting on the counter watching Julian chase Olivia around the kitchen with a tequila bottle that had a giant worm in it.
“Stop chasing me asshole or I refuse to be your date to your parents wedding,” Olivia shrieked as she ran in front of me.
“Fine,” he said and stopped chasing her.
“What day are we leaving?” Derrick asked leaning against the counter, one arm draped over Audrey’s shoulders.
“We leave on the 25th I think that is a Tuesday,” Julian answered back.
“Where are you guys going?” I asked confused looking around the group at a total loss as to what they were discussing.
“You haven’t asked her yet?” Julian smacked Jamieson’s arm.
“Uh…I was going to do it tonight,” Jamieson spoke up.
“Ask me what? What are you guys talking about?” I demanded.
“My parents are getting married…or I guess remarried. Anyways, the wedding is next month at their house in Santo Domingo and this jackass right here was supposed to invite you as his date,” Julian said nonchalantly.
“Oh.” Clearly Jamieson had decided to not ask me.
“We are all going,” Audrey explained excitedly. “Derrick asked me to be his date and Julian is taking Livy obviously.”
“Fun,” is all I could muster. I was jealous. I wanted to go to the Dominican Republic with all my friends, but obviously Jamieson didn’t want to take me for some reason.
I looked at Jamieson but he didn’t look at me, instead he just stared at the kitchen floor. I could feel emotions welling up inside of me threatening to break loose.
“Well I hope you guys have fun. I’m tired so I’m going to head to bed,” I told them, turning and making a hasty exit.
“Nice going, dickwad!” I heard Livy say to Jamieson as I took the stairs two at a time.
I made it to my room and shut myself inside. I felt stupid. I should have known better than to think things could go back to how they were. It was never going to be like that again and I needed to accept that fact.
There was a gentle knock at my door a few minutes later. I knew Livy and Audrey would follow me and try to comfort me.
“It’s open,” I told them.
But who entered my room wasn’t Audrey or Olivia. It was him. He stood by the doorway silently watching me.
“What do you want, Jamieson?” I glared at him.
“I did it again, didn’t I?” he asked quietly.
“Did what?” I sniffed trying to keep my tears back.
“I hurt you again,” he said.
“I just was caught off guard is all,” I tried to make excuses for my emotions.
“Jenna…” he said coming closer to my bed. “I was going to ask you tonight. I was going to do it after we left the bar but when we ran into Trinity it just didn’t seem like the right time. Then Julian just blurted everything out. That wasn’t how I had planned it,” he explained.
“It’s alright. You don’t have to explain anything.”
“Yes I do.” He moved to stand next to me. “I want nothing more than for you to be my date to the wedding.”
He reached his hand out cupping me cheek.
“You do?” I asked.
“Yes of course,” he replied gently. “I’m sorry you were upset this evening. That is not how I pictured this going.”
“It’s alright, I had a good time for the most part,” I told him.
“Well for what it’s worth I had an amazing time. Thank you for agreeing to go on a date with me,” he said still holding me gently.