“Stop saying that! I made my choices. I choose to drink in excess that night, I choose to go off alone with you, I choose to marry you and I choose to sleep with you. Even if I can’t remember doing any of it, I still made those choices. I may not have been the instigator but I was your cohort, your accomplice. I was the girl that helped you cheat. I became the one person I swore I never would be, I became the other woman.”

Jamieson flinched at my bluntness but said nothing for a long moment. When he began to speak it was calm but with intensity. “You are not the other woman Jenna, you could never be the other woman, do you understand me? I do not want Trinity. She is not the one that my body craves in the middle of the night. She is not the one that my heart aches for day in and day out. She could never be that person to me.”

His proclamation shocked and confused me. “Then who is she, Jamieson?”

He looked at me clearly weighing what he was going to tell me. “She is the reason I destroyed us five years ago. She is the reason I left.”

He was confusing me. Had Trinity been one of the girls I caught him with that night? I sat quietly just watching him struggle with what he was revealing. “I don’t understand.”

“I know, Jenna, I know. It’s time I finally tell you what really happened all those years ago,” he said sinking down on to the edge of the couch.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

February 14, 2010…

Things were different now. If I was honest it started once we arrived home from Aspen. Jamieson had grown more and more distant. He still had wanted to see me though. I had talked myself into believing it was just the stress of work. I had tried several times to get him to confide in me about the struggles he was having with work, but he had refused. I knew since his father had died and he took over at the whiskey distillery things had been tough for him. I got the distinct impression that the Wellington whiskey fortune was in great jeopardy but I didn’t know how to help Jamieson if he wouldn’t confide in me. To make matters worse, I was stressed as well. I was interning at a local criminal defense firm trying to prepare for law school. The firm was beginning to try a capital murder case any day so I was working long hours bringing the attorneys endless amounts of coffee and typing up pleadings late into the night.

That is why I was looking forward to Valentine’s Day so much. After what happened between us the week before, I needed to see him. I needed to be reassured that things were okay between us. Jamieson and I had made plans during the week to celebrate Valentine’s Day together. He said he was going to make dinner for me and we were going to watch a movie at home. A cozy night at home with him sounded more than perfect to me.

I got to Jamieson’s house later than I expected that evening. I thought he would probably be waiting on me and I hoped he wouldn’t be disappointed with my tardiness. When I pulled up to Jamieson’s house it was dark. I used the keypad on the garage to enter the house like I normally did. When I got in the house I went toward the kitchen expecting to find Jamieson, but to my surprise he wasn’t there. The stove was off and there was no sign of him. I walked down the long hallway to see if anybody was home but it was quiet. The guys must have all had plans. I headed upstairs to see if maybe he was in his office or in the bedroom.

I called out as I reached the top stairs but no one was home. I entered the large bedroom not sure I was looking for but something instinctively told me to look on the bed. My intuition had been right. On the bed was a note from Jamieson.

Jenna,

I had to go to New York last minute.

I’m sorry to have to cancel. I’ll call you when I get in.

Jamieson

I sat down on the edge of the bed crumpling the note in my hand and began to cry. It was glaringly obvious now that things had deteriorated farther than what I had allowed myself to believe. It was clear now how bad things had gotten. We were in trouble and I was scared. I loved this man. I didn’t want to lose him but something deep down whispered that I was perhaps holding onto something that had already escaped me.

I cried for a long time in Jamieson’s room alone, until I finally regained my strength and left. When I went to my apartment it was cold and lonely. I immediately drew a warm bath and soaked my tired body, hoping it would bring me some relief.

I watched T.V. for a few hours checking my phone like a crazy person but there was no reason to, Jamieson did not call or text.

I fell asleep on my couch and was awakened by my cell phone first thing in the morning. I immediately lunged for my phone hoping it was Jamieson, but it was my sister. I had forgotten I had volunteered to help teach lessons to some of the novice riders this morning. Thank goodness she called to remind me.

I showered and threw on a pair of breaches, my navy quilted jacket and my leather hunt boots. I made it to the barn in record time. Jacks’ barn was about twenty minutes outside of the city but depending on traffic it could take forty minutes. When I pulled up I saw Jacks bundled in her warm coat walking down the row of stalls checking each horse.

“What are you doing here, crazy? You just gave birth two weeks ago. Shouldn’t you be at home?”

“I just wanted to check them. I haven’t been to the barn since I had Libby.” She said still checking the row of horses.

“How is my gorgeous niece? I didn’t get to see her yesterday.” I asked zipping up my quilted jacket and following Jacks down the aisle of the barn.

“She is wonderful. She is such an easy baby so far. She sleeps through the night almost every night and Lukas is amazing with her.” Jacks glowed as she talked about her new daughter. She had gone into labor late at night. She called me completely calm letting me know it was time. I of course was a crazy person running around my house making sure I had everything to go to the hospital. Jacks had told me she wanted me to be in the room when she gave birth, I tried to politely decline but she was having none of that, she insisted I be in there. I can’t exactly say I was glad to have witnessed it all, it is my firm belief that women who haven’t given birth should not be in that room. But I was glad to be the first person to hold my gorgeous niece after her parents had their turns. It was magical seeing her and it made me realize I wanted what my sister had. The question was, did Jamieson want that same thing.

“What’s wrong, Jens?” Jacks said looking up from her inspection of the horses, and immediately fixated on me.

“Nothing.” I walked past her toward the tack room.

“You can’t lie to me, I’m your sister. Now tell me what is wrong.” She stormed after me.

“It’s nothing, I just was let down is all.” I tried to give her a half truth in an attempt to satisfy her curiosity.

“What did he do?” Jacks demanded.

“He didn’t do anything,” I told her as I pulled a saddle out from the rack on the wall.

“Damn it Jenna, just tell me!” Jacks pushed past me blocking my way out of the tack room.

I sighed in defeat knowing I was about to spill my guts to her. “We were supposed to have a relaxing intimate dinner at his house for Valentine’s Day, but when I got there I found an empty house and a note saying he had to travel to New York for business. I spent most of the night crying and checking my phone incessantly, but he hasn’t called.”

“Oh Jens, I’m sorry,” Jacks wrapped her arms around me and I felt a loan tear slide down my cheek.

“I think I’m losing him,” I squeaked out.

“Jenna, I warned you about the Wellingtons. I was worried this would happen but I had hoped that Jamieson was different from his brother. But it seems they are both cut from the same cloth.”