“Shall I fetch you a cuppa love?”
“Actually Sonia, you could do me a favour, I need you to go back home and get me my two mobiles from the cabinet in my room, I need to sort some stuff out.”
Glad to finally be of some use to her son, Sonia agreed, she also wanted to make sure that Kate was okay, and to warn her that it might not be a good idea to tell Jay that she had moved in, at least not yet. The boy seemed to have other things on his mind.
Sonia hurried off, leaving Jay to mull over what he was going to do once he was out of hospital. When he did get back out there he would be on his own, there would be no more backup for him, so he needed to get things organised.
14
Tanya had a major hump again. She felt as if she had the permanent hump. Billy had been out every bloody night now for the best part of this week, and she was fed up.
Scraping yet another of his dinners into the waste disposal unit, she looked at the clock above the oven; it was ten o’clock. She wasn’t the best cook in the world but she had made a real effort with dinner tonight, making chilli con carne, which was Billy’s favourite. She had mentioned to him earlier that she was going to cook for him tonight, and still he couldn’t be bothered to come home to eat with her. No guesses as to where he would be tonight, she sighed. Looking around her gleaming kitchen, Tanya felt depressed.
It had been a month now since Kate had moved in with Jay and his mum, and for the entire time Billy had been like a bear with a sore bleeding head, he was moody, on edge and had been down The Dog every night not coming home until the early hours.
Tanya scrubbed the already gleaming kitchen sides, taking her anger out on her pristine Italian marble worktops, forgetting in her anger that they had cost a fortune, just like the rest of her designer kitchen. Throwing the sponge into the sink, Tanya sighed to herself loudly. The night that Billy had the row with Kate had been unbearable. Apparently he had gone home to find that Kate had packed her bags and left. Fuming, Billy had called her mobile at least twenty times, although it kept going to voicemail. Pleading with her to answer her phone, she had finally done so and told him that she knew it was him who had beaten Jay up, and as far as she was concerned she had to make a choice for her unborn baby: Billy or Jay. She had chosen Jay. After informing Billy that he was no longer anything to her or her child and that she never wanted to hear from him again, she had hung up on him.
Billy couldn’t believe the way Kate was acting. He hadn’t laid a finger on that piece of shite. Billy was sure that Jay loved this. The smug bastard was probably laughing his mug off.
Even Tanya had to admit, only to herself of course, she wouldn’t dream of voicing her doubts to Billy, that she had her suspicions that Billy was behind Jay’s beating, especially after the way he reacted to the news of Kate being pregnant, but she knew that if Billy had done it, despite Kate’s reaction to the whole situation, Billy would have confessed to them both by now if it had been him. He was the type to stand by his actions, and Tanya knew he was genuinely upset by his sister’s reaction to him, because he really was telling her the truth, he really hadn’t dished out the beating to Jay. When he had found out that his sister had then gone and moved into Jay’s mum’s place he felt sick to his stomach, imagining that she would be round there attending to that scumbag’s every whim. He realised now that he had played it all wrong, now his sister had chosen that piece of filth over him. Hoping that in time Kate would calm down and reconsider, Billy had left her alone. He had no other choice, he didn’t want to lose her forever so he thought he would bide his time, although inside he was stewing. It had been a whole month now and there had been no word from Kate at all. His sister was all he really had, he had always been so protective of her, and growing up as the only man in the house he had kind of taken on the whole provider/protector role too. He wasn’t very good at being on his own, like most men, there was too much shit going round inside his head, being on your own meant that you had to think about stuff, and who could be bothered with all of that? So he had stayed most of the month at the flat with Tanya. He was getting in the way though, and she often had an irritated tone to her voice when she spoke to him. He just wanted to lounge around, chill out a bit, smoke a few joints, but Tanya was clean and tidy and organised, and she knew it was driving him nuts. He sometimes said she had OCD. He wanted her to be more chilled, loosen up a little. After this month living together, the cracks were definitely starting to show.
Tanya had been made up when he had turned up with a bag of his stuff in tow, she thought that maybe now Kate had pissed off and become someone else’s problem that she would have Billy to herself. She had planned quiet little dinners in, thought she could light a few candles, put on a nice bit of music, she couldn’t wait to spend every minute with her fella. But Billy was driving her crazy with his grumpiness and short-temper. When he was at home he mainly sat around making the place look untidy, constantly banging on about Kate, almost as if he were obsessed. He was her brother, but the way he had been acting you would have thought that he was her poor jilted lover. And he was getting worse. Tanya sighed; she knew that Kate meant a lot to Billy, but this was unhealthy.
Calling him and giving him agro wasn’t Tanya’s style, she would bide her time, she knew that she wouldn’t be able to take much more of this from him, but was well aware that this was actually his place at the end of the day, and she loved this flat, it was her very own little oasis. If things carried on the way they were going and Tanya lost it, Billy would just end it with her, and she’d lose it all. She had no intentions of going back to nothing. She had a status now, when she went out with the girls, which wasn’t very often these days, she had got into the habit of being home in case Billy wanted to come by. She was treated like royalty when sge was out though. They knew she was Billy’s girlfriend, and as everyone wanted to keep him happy, they knew they should keep her happy too. Tanya was sure that her beauty also played a part in the attention she got; she couldn’t help but notice the looks she got from other men when she was out. It was a shame Billy didn’t appreciate what he had.
Tanya was glad when Billy did finally bugger off out to The Dog in the afternoons, she was enjoying the peace and quiet. Reaching for her glass of wine, Tanya gulped it down, loving the coolness and the feeling of familiar numbness taking over. She had felt more and more like a kid lately, having to sneak a drink whenever Billy wasn’t looking. She was careful when Billy was home, he didn’t mind her having a drink, and in fact he had commented a couple of times that she was more chilled when she’d had one. What Billy didn’t know was that she could quite happily do a whole bottle in an evening just to herself and sometimes if she was having a shit day she did have the odd glass, even if it was still morning, though that had only happened a few times. Well, maybe more than a few, but she wasn’t addicted or anything like that, she wasn’t an alky. Alcoholics sat on benches drinking Special Brew, they were low down in the food chain. She was in control. No, she didn’t have a problem; she just enjoyed a few drinks every now and again. After another long swig of wine, her mood started to lift. She loved the calm that swept over her. At least when Billy wasn’t here, she could have as much as she liked without feeling guilty or having to justify it to him. Pouring another glass, she smiled to herself as she remembered a saying her nan used to say to her all through her childhood: “Be careful what you wish for; because one day, Tanya, you might get it”. She finally understood the meaning, taking the rest of the bottle into bedroom Tanya prepared herself for yet another fun-filled night of watching telly in bed, alone.