MESSENGER

The virtuous lady, Countess of Auvergne,

With modesty admiring thy renown,

By me entreats, great lord, thou wouldst vouchsafe

To visit her poor castle where she lies,

That she may boast she hath beheld the man

Whose glory fills the world with loud report.

BURGUNDY

Is it even so? Nay, then I see our wars

Will turn unto a peaceful comic sport,

When ladies crave to be encountered with.

You may not, my lord, despise her gentle suit.

TALBOT

Ne’er trust me then, for when a world of men

Could not prevail with all their oratory,

Yet hath a woman’s kindness overruled.—

And therefore tell her I return great thanks,

And in submission will attend on her.—

Will not your honours bear me company?

BEDFORD

No, truly, ‘tis more than manners will.

And I have heard it said, ‘Unbidden guests

Are often welcomest when they are gone’.

TALBOT

Well then, atone—since there’s no remedy—

I mean to prove this lady’s courtesy.

Come hither, captain.

He whispers

You perceive my mind?

CAPTAIN

I do, my lord, and mean accordingly.

Exeunt ⌈severally⌉

2.3 Enter the Countess of Auvergne and her Porter

COUNTESS

Porter, remember what I gave in charge,

And when you have done so, bring the keys to me.

PORTER Madam, I will. Exit

COUNTESS

The plot is laid. If all things fall out right,

I shall as famous be by this exploit

As Scythian Tomyris by Cyrus’ death.

Great is the rumour of this dreadful knight,

And his achievements of no less account.

Fain would mine eyes be witness with mine ears,

To give their censure of these rare reports.

Enter Messenger and Lord Talbot

MESSENGER

Madam, according as your ladyship desired,

By message craved, so is Lord Talbot come.

COUNTESS

And he is welcome. What, is this the man?

MESSENGER

Madam, it is.

COUNTESS Is this the scourge of France?

Is this the Talbot, so much feared abroad

That with his name the mothers still their babes?

I see report is fabulous and false.

I thought I should have seen some Hercules,

A second Hector, for his grim aspect

And large proportion of his strong-knit limbs.

Alas, this is a child, a seely dwarf.

It cannot be this weak and writhled shrimp

Should strike such terror to his enemies.

TALBOT

Madam, I have been bold to trouble you.

But since your ladyship is not at leisure,

I’ll sort some other time to visit you.

He is going

COUNTESS (to Messenger)

What means he now? Go ask him whither he goes.

MESSENGER

Stay, my Lord Talbot, for my lady craves

To know the cause of your abrupt departure.

TALBOT

Marry, for that she’s in a wrong belief,

I go to certify her Talbot’s here.

Enter Porter with keys

COUNTESS

If thou be he, then art thou prisoner.

TALBOT

Prisoner? To whom?

COUNTESS To me, bloodthirsty lord;

And for that cause I trained thee to my house.

Long time thy shadow hath been thrall to me,

For in my gallery thy picture hangs;

But now the substance shall endure the like,

And I will chain these legs and arms of thine

That hast by tyranny these many years

Wasted our country, slain our citizens,

And sent our sons and husbands captivate—

TALBOT Ha, ha, ha!

COUNTESS

Laughest thou, wretch? Thy mirth shall turn to moan.

TALBOT

I laugh to see your ladyship so fond

To think that you have aught but Talbot’s shadow

Whereon to practise your severity.

COUNTESS Why? Art not thou the man?

TALBOT I am indeed.

COUNTESS Then have I substance too.

TALBOT

No, no, I am but shadow of myself.

You are deceived; my substance is not here.

For what you see is but the smallest part

And least proportion of humanity.

I tell you, madam, were the whole frame here,

It is of such a spacious lofty pitch

Your roof were not sufficient to contain’t.

COUNTESS

This is a riddling merchant for the nonce.

He will be here, and yet he is not here.

How can these contrarieties agree?

TALBOT

That will I show you presently.

He winds his horn. Within, drums strike up; a peal of ordnance. Enter English soldiers

How say you, madam? Are you now persuaded

That Talbot is but shadow of himself?

These are his substance, sinews, arms, and strength,

With which he yoketh your rebellious necks,

Razeth your cities and subverts your towns,

And in a moment makes them desolate.

COUNTESS

Victorious Talbot, pardon my abuse.

I find thou art no less than fame hath bruited,

And more than may be gathered by thy shape.

Let my presumption not provoke thy wrath,

For I am sorry that with reverence

I did not entertain thee as thou art.

TALBOT

Be not dismayed, fair lady, nor misconster

The mind of Talbot, as you did mistake

The outward composition of his body.

What you have done hath not offended me;

Nor other satisfaction do I crave

But only, with your patience, that we may

Taste of your wine and see what cates you have: