Up with a course or two and tack about, boys.

Good night, good night, you’re gone. I am very

hungry.

Would I could find a fine frog—he would tell me

News from all parts o‘th’ world, then would I make

A carrack of a cockle-shell, and sail

By east and north-east to the King of Pygmies,

For he tells fortunes rarely. Now my father,

Twenty to one, is trussed up in a trice

Tomorrow morning. I’ll say never a word.

(She sings)

For I’ll cut my green coat, a foot above my knee,

And I’ll clip my yellow locks, an inch below mine eye,

Hey nonny, nonny, nonny,

He s’buy me a white cut, forth for to ride,

And I’ll go seek him, through the world that is so wide,

Hey nonny, nonny, nonny.

O for a prick now, like a nightingale,

To put my breast against. I shall sleep like a top else.

Exit

3.5 Enter Gerald (a schoolmaster), five Countrymen, one of whom is dressed as a Babion, five Wenches, and Timothy, a taborer. All are attired as morris dancers

SCHOOLMASTER Fie, fie,

What tediosity and disinsanity

Is here among yet Have my rudiments

Been laboured so long with ye, milked unto ye,

And, by a figure, even the very plum-broth

And marrow of my understanding laid upon ye?

And do you still cry ‘where?’ and ‘how?’ and

‘wherefore?’

You most coarse frieze capacities, ye jean judgements,

Have I said, ‘thus let be’, and ‘there let be’,

And ‘then let be’, and no man understand me?

Proh deum, medius fidius-ye are all dunces.

Forwhy, here stand I. Here the Duke comes. There are

you,

Close in the thicket. The Duke appears. I meet him,

And unto him I utter learnèd things

And many figures. He hears, and nods, and hums,

And then cries, ‘Rare!’, and I go forward. At length

I fling my cap up—mark there—then do you,

As once did Meleager and the boar,

Break comely out before him, like true lovers,

Cast yourselves in a body decently,

And sweetly, by a figure, trace and turn, boys.

FIRST COUNTRYMAN

And sweetly we will do it, master Gerald.

SECOND COUNTRYMAN

Draw up the company. Where’s the taborer?

THIRD COUNTRYMAN

Why, Timothy!

TABORER Here, my mad boys, have at ye!

SCHOOLMASTER

But I say, where’s these women?

FOURTH COUNTRYMAN Here’s Friz and Madeline.

SECOND COUNTRYMAN

And little Luce with the white legs, and bouncing Barbara.

FIRST COUNTRYMAN

And freckled Nell, that never failed her master.

SCHOOLMASTER

Where be your ribbons, maids? Swim with your bodies

And carry it sweetly and deliverly,

And now and then a favour and a frisk.

NELL

Let us alone, sir.

SCHOOLMASTER

Where’s the rest o’th’ music?

THIRD COUNTRYMAN

Dispersed as you commanded.

SCHOOLMASTER

Couple, then,

And see what’s wanting. Where’s the babion?

(To the Babion) My friend, carry your tail without

offence

Or scandal to the ladies; and be sure

You tumble with audacity and manhood,

And when you bark, do it with judgement.

BABION Yes, sir.

SCHOOLMASTER

Quousque tandem? Here is a woman wanting!

FOURTH COUNTRYMAN

We may go whistle—all the fat’s i’th’ fire.

SCHOOLMASTER We have,

As learned authors utter, washed a tile;

We have been fatuus, and laboured vainly.

SECOND COUNTRYMAN

This is that scornful piece, that scurvy hilding

That gave her promise faithfully she would be here—

Cicely, the seamstress’ daughter.

The next gloves that I give her shall be dogskin.

Nay, an she fail me once—you can tell, Areas,

She swore by wine and bread she would not break.

SCHOOLMASTER An eel and woman,

A learned poet says, unless by th’ tail

And with thy teeth thou hold, will either fail—

In manners this was false position.

FIRST COUNTRYMAN

A fire-ill take her! Does she flinch now?

THIRD COUNTRYMAN What

Shall we determine, sir?

SCHOOLMASTER

Nothing;

Our business is become a nullity,

Yea, and a woeful and a piteous nullity.

FOURTH COUNTRYMAN

Now, when the credit of our town lay on it,

Now to be frampold, now to piss o’th’ nettle!

Go thy ways—I’ll remember thee, I’ll fit thee!

Enter the Jailer’s Daughter

JAILER’S DAUGHTER (sings)

The George Alow came from the south,

From the coast of Barbary-a;

And there he met with brave gallants of war,

By one, by two, by three-a.

‘Well hailed, well hailed, you jolly gallants,

And whither now are you bound-a?

O let me have your company

Till I come to the sound-a.’

There was three fools fell out about an owlet—

The one he said it was an owl,

The other he said nay,

The third he said it was a hawk,

And her bells were cut away.

THIRD COUNTRYMAN

There’s a dainty madwoman, master,

Comes i’th’ nick, as mad as a March hare.

If we can get her dance, we are made again.

I warrant her, she’ll do the rarest gambols.

FIRST COUNTRYMAN

A madwoman? We are made, boys.

SCHOOLMASTER (to the Jailer’s Daughter)

And are you mad, good woman?

JAILER’S DAUGHTER

I would be sorry else.