Mr. Spaulding went up the stairs without a sound save a kind of old engine coughing. He was already in bed when his wife arrived, exhilarated, and got in. She lay half smiling, glowing, in the dark.
Finally, she heard him sigh.
“I feel terrible,” Leonard Spaulding said.
“Why?” she said.
“I don’t know,” he moaned. “I just don’t feel good. Depressed.”
“I’m sorry,” she said.
“You and that damned Mrs. Hette. Christ, what an evening. Will, he’s not so bad. But her and you. Christ, Christ, talk, talk!” He groaned in the dark room, all misery and ancient tiredness.
She tightened up. “We never have any one in any more.”
“We’re getting too old to have people in,” he cried, faintly. “There’s only one thing for old people to talk about, and you talked about it, by God, all evening!”
“Why, we didn’t—”
“Shut up,” he said, wearily, pleadingly, like a small withered child beside her. “I want to sleep.”
They both lay for five minutes in the dark. She turned away from him, cold, stiff, her eyelids tight clenched. And just before her anger at him seeped away and sleep flooded down all through her like a drenching of warm rain, she heard two faint far women’s voices talking one unto another, distantly, obscurely:
“My Will’s funeral was the finest the town ever had. Flowers? Thousands! I cried. People? Everyone in town!”—“Well, you should have been at Leonard’s funeral service. He looked so fine and natural, just like he was asleep. And flowers? Land! Banked around and banked around, and people!” — “Well, Will’s service was” — “They sang ‘Beautiful Isle of Somewhere.’” — “—people—” — “—flowers and—” — “—singing—”
The warm rain pattered over her. She slept.
I GOT SOMETHING YOU AIN’T GOT!
AGGIE LOU COULD hardly wait through the morning until Clarisse stopped in the house on the way home from school to lunch. Clarisse was the braided ten-year-old girl who lived next door and there was considerable rivalry between them.
Aggie Lou folded her body half out of the sunshiny window and called, “Clarisse, come up!”
“Why weren’t you in school?” cried Clarisse, perturbed that her life opponent should be bedded down and taking it easy away from the grim school life.
“Come up and find out!” replied Aggie Lou, flopping back into bed.
Clarisse came upstairs quickly, a strap of books pendulumming in one grubby fist.
Aggie Lou lay back, eyes closed, pleased with herself. “I got something you ain’t got,” she revealed.
“What?” asked Clarisse suspiciously.
“Maybe I’ll tell, maybe I won’t,” said Aggie Lou, lazily.
“I gotta go home and eat,” said Clarisse, not taken in by this strategy.
“Then you’ll never know what I got,” said Aggie Lou.
“Well, what is it?” shouted Clarisse, scowling.
“Bacteria,” announced Aggie Lou proudly.
Clarisse’s eyebrows went down. “What?”
“Bacteria. Microbes. Germs!”
“Oh, poo!” Clarisse swung her books carelessly. “Everybody’s got germs. I got germs, too. Looky.” She displayed ten fingers, equally begrubbed and the furthest state from antiseptic.
“That’s on the outside,” criticized Aggie Lou. “I got my germs on the inside, where it counts!”
Clarisse was finally impressed. “Inside?”
“They’re running around all over my machine, Dad says. Dad smiles funny when he says it. So does the doctor. They say I got them all over my lungs, having a regular picnic.”
Clarisse looked at her as if she were some black-braided saint glowing in holy repose upon crisp linen. “Lordy.”
“The doctor took some of my germs and put them under one of them seeing things and they ran around playing cops and robbers under his eyes. So there!”
Clarisse had to sit down. Her face was a little pale and flushed at the same time. It was easy to see that Aggie Lou’s triumph had made inroads upon her peace of mind. This particular triumph was much bigger than Clarisse’s Monarch butterfly which she had captured with a piggy squeal in her back yard last week and taunted Aggie Lou with. It was even the next size triumph over Clarisse’s party dress, which was all ruffles and pink roses and ribbons. It was a factor over and above Clarisse’s Uncle Peter who spat brown spit from a toothless mouth and had one wooden leg. Germs. Real germs, inside!
“So,” finished Aggie Lou, controlling her triumph with admirable calm, “I won’t go to school ever again. I won’t have to learn arithmetic or anything!”
Clarisse sat there, defeated.
“And that ain’t all,” said Aggie Lou, holding back the best thing for the last.
“What else?” demanded Clarisse harshly.
Aggie Lou looked about her bedroom quietly, settling back and worming into the blankets warm and nice. Then she said, “I’m going to die.”
Clarisse leaped from her chair, hair bouncing in blonde startlement. “What?”
“Yes. I’m going to die.” Aggie Lou smiled gravely. “So there, Smarty!”
“Oh, Aggie Lou, you’re lying! You’re a dirty fibber!”
“I’m not either! You just ask Mama or Papa or Doctor Nielson! They’ll tell you! I’m going to die. And I’m going to have the nicest coffin ever. Dad said so. You should see Dad when he talks to me. Sometimes he comes in late at night and sits here, where you’re sitting, and holds my hand. I can’t see him very well, except his eyes. They’re funny. He says lots of things. He says I’ll have a coffin plated with gold, and satin inside, a regular doll house. He says I’ll have dolls to play with. He says he’s buying me some land of my own for my doll house where I can play all by myself, Smarty. It’ll be on a hill where I can own the whole world just by looking at it, Dad said it, too. And, and, and I’ll just play with my dolls and look pretty. I’m going to have a green party dress like yours, and a Monarch butterfly, and better than your Uncle Peter I’ll have SAINT Peter for myself!”
Clarisse’s face was tense with keeping back the jealous rage in her. Tears stood bold on her cheeks, and she rose undecided from her perch to stare at Aggie Lou.
Then, screaming fitfully, she plunged from the room, ran down the stairs, and out into the spring day, and across the green lawn to her house, sobbing all the way.
Clarisse slammed the door in upon herself and the kitchen cooking odors. Clarisse’s mother was dissecting apples into a crust-lined tin and she declaimed against the door slamming.
“Oh, I don’t care!” snuffled the little girl, sliding her pink bloomered bottom upon the built-in table bench. “That old Aggie Lou next door!”
Clarisse’s mother looked up. “Have you two been at it again? How many times have I told you?—”
“Well, she’s going to die, and she sits there in bed smiling at me, smiling at me. Gee!”
The mother dropped her knife. “Will you say that again, young lady?”
“She’s going to die, and she sits there laughing at me! Oh, mother, what’ll I do?”
“What’ll you do? About it? Or what?” Bewilderment. The mother had to sit down, her fingers were jumping up and down on her apron.
“I’ve got to stop her, Mother! She can’t get away with it!”
“That’s awfully nice of you, Clarisse, being so thoughtful.”
“I’m not being nice, Mama. I hate her, I hate her, I hate her.”
“But I don’t understand. If you hate her, why are you trying to help her?”
“I don’t want to help her!”
“But you just said—”
“Oh, Mama, you don’t help!” She cried bitterly and bit her lips.
“Honestly, you children. It’s so hard to figure you out. Do you or don’t you want to do something about Aggie Lou?”
“I do! I’ve got to stop her! She can’t do it. She’s so stuck up about her—germs!” Clarisse pounded the table top. “She keeps singing ‘I got something you ain’t got!’”
Her mother exhaled. “Oh, I think I’m beginning to see.”