“Enough. So, you ready for the first tour?”

“See, I told you,” Haverty says to Alyssa. “She thought you guys were calling us over to help you move furniture and boxes.”

“No,” I laugh. “We have a moving company for all that.”

“I can’t wait another moment, come on, Cove. Let us in,” Sophia runs up the steps to the Craftsman style double front doors and rings the doorbell. “Oh, this is so wonderful.” She pushes it again and then takes Alyssa by the hand, tossing her a wink as I pull out the key.

I let everyone into the entryway and the women race around the house. Alyssa’s voice echoes through the empty spaces, and with each room she enters she says, for realz? She cracks me up, both women do.

“Hardwood floors in every room, tiled bathrooms, no carpet anywhere. The two of you are always living the high life. Girlfriend, look at your closet!” I hear Alyssa say with excitement in her voice. “Jimmy! They have one of those flat screens up here with a flickering fireplace! Jimmy!” she calls out. Haverty smiles and looks around the chef style kitchen before entering the two-story living room that has floor to ceiling windows overlooking a park-like backyard. His eyes become fixated on the landscaping, just like mine did the first time I saw it. Big pines, brick patio, flowerbeds, and of course, a pool.

“I knew it. Alyssa!” he calls out. “I win the bet, he’s got a pool. You owe me the monster meal from Pizza Palace! I want it tonight, my Muffin Mama!”

“Yeah, the pool’s heated too. We saw this place when we viewed the one next door. Soph and I stood on the second floor deck and couldn’t believe the sight of the yard that was on the other side of the fence. What a set-up these people made for themselves. It’s like an oasis in the city. They took great care of the place too. It didn’t need a thing, the inspection passed with flying colors.”

“The grass is always greener on the other side, right?”

“Perhaps,” I smirk, jingling the keys and tossing them in the air. “It’s all yours, my friend,” I watch Haverty catch them with a blank stare.

“Nuh-uh,” Alyssa whispers from the doorway to the living room as her and Soph walk in.

“Yeah-huh,” Sophia laughs and pulls her closer to the giant windows. “Isn’t it pretty?” My wife opens the doors to the backyard and simultaneously, they both close their eyes and inhale the fresh air.

“Are you shitting me, Cove?” Haverty’s voice trembles as he asks the question. “You bought us a house, no wait,” he shakes his head. “You bought us a fucking castle?”

“It’s an elegant house in a stylish neighborhood that both of you deserve to be in,” Sophia corrects him.

I start to explain in greater detail. “We have some money set aside for the two of you, and the house is paid for, and...”

“No, wait,” Haverty holds up his hand to stop the conversation. “I know what’s going on. This is payback for that time I told you to buy Sophia some chocolate, and she and I made a plan to mess with you. Right?”

I slap him on the shoulder with a smile and shake my head as the four of us walk into the backyard. “This is your home, yours and Alyssa’s. It’s not a joke, my friend. We did this for you.”

“What about you guys?” Alyssa asks.

“We’re right next door,” Sophia says and points to our modest gem.

“Seriously?” they ask.

“Seriously,” Sophia and I respond with big grins and our arms around one another.

“Shit,” Haverty covers his eyes for a moment then runs his hand down his face and looks back at his home. He bows his head, then turns to me and rushes in, nearly knocking me down as I’m swaddled in a giant bear hug. “Thanks man,” he says in a teary voice. “Thank you.”

“Hav,” I mumble. “I can’t breathe.”

He releases me and I see Alyssa hugging Sophia in great appreciation. “Prudence and Max are gonna be in seventh heaven when they see this yard,” she says. “I can’t believe you did this for us. Can the dogs swim in the pool?”

“They can do whatever they want, but you’ll let me jump the fence and swim sometimes too, right?” I ask.

“As long as you’re in a swimsuit and your wiener isn’t hanging out, you bet,” Alyssa teases.

“So, does this mean the four of us are going to become boring and shit. All domesticated, married, playing catch, and having picnics with our kids?” Haverty asks.

“Kids?” Alyssa questions. “You guys having more than one?”

“Going to plays,” he continues. “Borrowing sugar and eggs from one another.”

“Five,” Sophia says. “I want to have five kids.”

“You want five kids, Dove?”

Haverty laughs and continues. “Surprise birthday parties, potlucks, and watching sitcoms when we’re not at work.”

“But don’t forget about sex, Hav.” Sophia adds. “That has to be in there somewhere. I’m not gonna stop making love, screwing, fucking, whatever you want to call it. Life may become normal, but it doesn’t have to be bland.”

“What do you think, Cove?” he asks.

“Haverty,” I say with a pat on his back before pulling my wife nearer to give her a kiss. “Boring and shit is what we all need. Fuck yeah, I hope that’s our future. What you just described sounds perfect. And yes,” I say to my wife. “We won’t forget about the sex.” I hold her tightly from behind and rub her stomach. She sighs and puts a hand on my forearm.

“I can’t wait, my love,” I say for her ears only. “I can’t wait.”

EPILOGUE

THE JOYOUS OCCASION

“They’re tiny,” I swallow hard with my hands on the glass of the hospital’s nursery.

“They’ll grow,” my father says. “You have two beautiful and healthy boys. Trust me, you want them to be this small for as long as possible.”

“I’m nervous.”

“That’s normal.”

“What if something happens to them? I feel like someone’s standing on my chest, Jesus, I need to get some air.”

My father grins and puts a hand on my shoulder. “You’ll feel this way for the rest of your life. Welcome to the wonderful world of parenthood.”

“How long did you feel like this?”

“Still feel, Cove,” he turns to my two sons. “They’ll have broken bones and illnesses, maybe stay out late and get drunk with their friends at Pagoda Lake,” he glares at me with a raised eyebrow.

“Funny, Dad.”

“You’ll have many sleepless nights. But you’re going to be a damn good father. I know it.”

“Like you.”

“Glad you think so,” he whispers and waves to one of my boys. “Sophia doing okay?”

“She’s wonderful. Amazing. Remarkable. And also exhausted and taking a nap,” I smile. “I can’t believe these two little guys came out of her body this morning. She’s going to be a good mother. It’s incredible how much she’s changed since the first day we met.”

“And you as well. I’m proud of you, by the way. Five months since you’ve had a drink?” I nod as he places his arm on my shoulder.

“Almost six,” I pause. “Do you believe how well Sophia turned out with such nutcases for family members?”

“She’s a survivor, son. We all are.”

“Wow, did you see that? I think my kid just gave me the finger.”

“Which one?”

“Daxton.”

“Well,” he laughs. “If you name your child Daxton, he’s going to give you the finger eventually. Especially when he finds out his middle name is Snow.”

“I know.” I shake my head and sigh. “Sophia decided to go with precipitation terms for their middle names. Considering the choices, Snow is better than Drizzle.”

“True,” he grins. “The two of you are odd, you know that?”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“So, Xavier’s middle name is Hail? Your mother said with a name like that he’s going to be a holy terror.”

“He’s a mix of an Everton and a Jameson, so yeah, I’d say so. Soph and I will have our hands full with these two.”

“I feel sorry for her, more so than you,” he laughs. She’s the one who has to live with three Everton boys.