Jace stuffs the empty velvet bag into his pocket and stands up. I follow. Outside the cave, Jace turns

to me. He doesn’t hug me. In fact he keeps his distance. The creek babbles. Birds chirp. And then his

words. His promise.

“I’ll never take it off.”

* * *

Lila and Dad take us to lunch to celebrate. We’re at a restaurant on the waterfront and we’re all

dressed up. I’ve managed to spill water on my shirt and I’m mopping my chest with a napkin. Annie is

laughing and shaking her head at me. Dad is content, resting back in his chair, looking out over the

glittering sea at the view of the city.

Lila sits on the other side of her son, her eyes rimmed with moisture, squeezing Jace’s hand.

“Seventeen,” she says. “I can’t believe how fast you’ve grown up.”

Jace kisses her cheek. “I still have a year at home before university.”

One more year.

Only one.

Then he’s off, and what about you? You’re still going to be in school. Two different worlds. He’ll

keep in contact for a while, but it will fizzle, and eventually you’ll merely be guys who grew up together,

and the friend part will end.

Dad swivels toward Lila, a melancholic smile playing at his lips. “Do you remember when we were

seventeen?”

Lila laughs and releases Jace’s hand, scavenging for her glass of orange juice. She’s about to drink

when she stops. “I was sad most of that year,” she says and Dad frowns, sitting up straight.

“You were?”

She sips her orange juice. “Yes. Hard not to be when your best friend goes to the States for six

months.”

“You had what’s-her-name. I thought you were fine. You always raved about how you two were

having all sorts of adventures. Made me jealous half the time.”

Lila looks surprised. “It did? I guess that was the point. I was having a miserable time but I wanted

you to miss me.”

Dad turns in his chair so he’s facing Lila directly. He takes her hand and kisses the palm. “You have

no idea how much I missed you.”

Annie clears her throat. “Maybe we should check the menus before the waiter gets here.” I read her

tightly spoken words. What about Mum? If they were already in love, how did he ever fall for Mum?

Did Dad ever love her? Certainly not truly, madly, deeply.

I stare at the three sets of knives and forks before me, polished to a shine.

Jace shifts and fiddles with the edge of the white tablecloth. A silent storm of emotion brews at our

table. Lila and Dad are lost in the past, lost in each other. The rest of us are lost in various degrees of

hurt.

Except I don’t understand why Jace is hurt. He and his mum won, so shouldn’t he be grinning?

Unless he feels bad for us.

I have to break the tension before Annie notices. She’s been perfectly open and loving since our

camping trip, and I don’t want her to regress. “Is that where you were converted into a Halloween

freak?”

Dad and Lila drop hands and Dad laughs. “You could say that.”

The rest of lunch is pleasant, though stiff. Every now and then Jace touches the hook making a

bump in his shirt, but he only looks at me once to laugh when an oyster pops free of its shell and lands

in his water glass.

After dessert, his mum asks, “What’s that you’re hiding under your T-shirt?”

I freeze. I’m not sure why exactly. It’s only a gift after all.

But it’s intimate. They’ll take one look and know.

Jace glances at me, reads my insecurity, and tells her he bought a necklace.

“You know you shouldn’t buy your own greenstone,” Lila says. “It’s only meant to be given to you

by someone who loves you.”

“All this talking about stones,” I say, trying to shake off the unexplainable shivers zipping up my

spine. “You’d think it was my birthday.”

Dad laughs. “Have you given Jace his stone yet?”

“Huh? No, he said he bought it himself!”

A small frown shadows Dad’s face in confusion. “I mean his birthstone. All the rest of us have

gotten ours. What is February anyway?”

I let out a relieved breath. “Amethyst. Which really would make the perfect gift. It’s believed to

sharpen wit, after all.”

Jace laughs and elbows me in the side, scowling. The light nudge sends a whole other set of zings

running through me.

“Also,” I say, our gazes catching for a second, “it’s thought of as a composer’s stone.”

Lila claps. “Yes. How perfect.”

When we arrive home, Jace checks the mailbox instead of going straight inside. I wait for him on

the porch. He’s staring at a large brown envelope as he slowly dawdles up the path. He notices me

watching him and hurries his step.

He rolls the envelope up and holds it at his side. “What’re you waiting for?”

“Want to play video games?” I gesture to the mail. “What’s that?”

“Nothing. Just university preparation stuff.”

Oh. For the second time since lunch, my belly feels hollow. “University.”

The envelope makes a scratchy sound like he’s clutching it tighter. Perhaps he senses that

hollowness, because he drops his gaze. “Give me a minute, and we can crack out the video games.”

Jace starts up the stairs, then stops and looks over the banister to where I’m still moping in the

entryway. “It’s still a year away.”

coal

Ernie and Bert come for a sleepover. We’ve been playing computer games in the gaming room all

night and it’s close to two o’clock in the morning. The guys settle into their coal-colored sleeping bags

on the floor and switch on the TV. “Something’s always on at this time of night,” Ernie says, flicking

through the channels. “Bert, hit the lights.”

The room is sucked into darkness and the TV screen becomes the focal point. I’m sitting on the

couch above the two guys, gripping the arm. Soft grunts and moans fill the room and fill my ears. Bert

and Ernie laugh and shove their hands into their bags.

Ernie looks at me, deadpan. “On the Mohs scale of hardness, I’m like a ten.”

Their sleeping bags start jerking in the middle—

“Need to piss!” I leap up from the couch and hurry out. “Shit.”

“Not having a good time?”

I jump. Jace is trundling back from the bathroom. Like me, he’s in nothing but boxers and a

sleeping shirt.

I shrug. “They’re watching porn.”

“Oh,” Jace says, like it’s the most natural thing in the world. “And?”

“Well . . . I don’t know.”

“You don’t want to do it? That’s cool.”

“No, I do. But they—they’ve done this before. In front of each other, I mean.”

Jace smiles. “You’re nervous?”

That, and the porn they’re watching isn’t exactly what I would have chosen.

Jace bites his lip and comes closer. “Maybe you need to find someone you feel more comfortable

with?”

I swallow and look down at us, close but not quite touching. With a shaky hand, I touch Jace’s

chest, then curl a fistful of shirt and draw him in close. He steps into it and his body presses against

mine; warm, solid, smelling of soap and citrus. I swallow. “Are you offering?”

Jace laughs softly, the puffs hitting my cheek and skimming to my ear. He doesn’t pull away

immediately. “What if I am?”

Does that mean you're gay too? Or just horny?

He walks back into his room, leaving the door open. An invitation. Just under the skin it bubbles,

and I even step up to the threshold of his room. He’s holding the door, watching me.

“Just a jerk off?” I ask.

“What else would it be?”

His room is dark, but milky light seeps in at the cracks of his curtains. Jace shoves his messy

bedspread back and pats the cleared space.

It’s excitingly awkward. I’m hard, though, and watching Jace touch himself through his piano-key

boxers is making me harder. Through the wall, muffled grunts and moans emanate from the TV.