Who am I? What am I? Why am I?

Who… what… where… how…

I think therefore I am…

I think therefore…

I think…

I…

What is ‘I’…

Nothing…

‘I’ is nothing…

I…

I…

i…

…

..

.

In the canteen, Donna had taken charge, and she soon had everyone relaxed and sorted out, which was a relief for the Doctor – she was much better at this human touchy-feely stuff than him. More importantly right now, she could lie far more convincingly, tell them it’d all been part of a computer virus sent out by MorganTech and that they could go back home as soon as it was daylight.

The Doctor had made a couple of quick calls to people he knew in high places (or maybe low ones) and announced that someone would be arriving very soon to give everyone air tickets and first-class reservations to wherever they wanted to go.

‘This is England,’ the old American man had muttered.

‘I always wanted to come to England. How on earth did I get here?’

The Doctor couldn’t answer that one but instead fobbed him and his lovely wife off by saying he’d arranged for them to stay in a hotel (not this one, thank God) in the centre of town, and they had a seven-day pass to explore the city. ‘Take the train out, go visit Bath, or Warwick or the Isle of Wight.’

‘Or Hull,’ Donna had added.

‘Donna, why would they want to go to Hull? What’s in Hull that they could possibly want to see?’

‘I dunno,’ she said. ‘I’ve never been to Hull. But I

always thought it sounded interesting.’

‘Hull’s lovely,’ Wilf joined in. ‘Went there for a long weekend once, to see a match. Went out on a boat.’

The Doctor gave in. ‘All right,’ he said to the Americans. ‘Go to Hull, too. It has boats. Apparently.’

The elderly couple went off muttering about Hull, and the Doctor turned his attention to the students. Three guys and a girl.

‘What happened to the Professor?’ asked the girl.

The two guys at the back (oh, so a couple, Donna decided) nodded, but the other man looked downcast. ‘He died, didn’t he?’

The Doctor nodded. ‘Italian man? Yes, I’m sorry.’

The students all stared at each other. ‘I don’t see any point in going back to Italy.’

‘I do,’ said the smaller guy at the back, looking at the other.

Ahhh, thought Donna.

‘We should at least tie up loose ends out there,’ the third guy said.

And the group wandered off, muttering together.

The Greek man was apologetic, saying he had no recollection of what he’d done, but guessed it hadn’t been good. The Doctor explained it wasn’t his fault and that he should go back to his family and forget about London.

The man wandered off, muttering.

‘Suppose he did something back in Greece? Suppose any of them did? Or all of them?’ Donna said.

‘I can’t sort everything out, Donna.’ He sighed. ‘We can only hope that whatever has happened in their pasts, if

anything, they can come to terms with it. And they’re unlikely to actually remember.’

‘You’re thinking of your friend at Copernicus, aren’t you?’

‘One of them killed him. Broke his neck. Our Greek friend seems the most likely, but I’m not a policeman. And I can’t prove anything.’

Donna pondered on the morality of it when her mobile phone bleeped. A text.

‘Miss Oladini,’ Donna waved her mobile at him. She read the text.

‘Is she all right?’ the Doctor asked.

‘She’s ecstatic. What did you do?’

‘Dunno what you mean.’

‘Doctor?’

‘Well, perhaps while I was sorting things out with UNIT for that lot, I may possibly have mentioned how indebted we all were to her, too.’

‘She says here,’ Donna smiled, ‘that she’s had her visitor’s status upgraded and can now come and go as she pleases. No more hiding. Oh, and she also says to tell you she has a cat called Dolly, and that you know what that means.’

The Doctor beamed. ‘Good for them both.’

‘Thought you didn’t like cats much?’

‘I always liked Dolly. And she deserves a good home.’

‘Doctor? How many other people did Madam Delphi use and then chuck away?’

‘Mankind were just tools to the Helix, tools to be used and abandoned.’

‘Like Netty?’

The Doctor visibly winced.

‘I’m sorry,’ Donna said. ‘That was below the belt.’

The Doctor looked at his friend. ‘But true, and honest. I had to take the risk, Donna. Once, I might’ve done it with less conscience.’

‘My God,’ Donna said in mock horror. ‘What have I done to you?’

The Doctor was serious. He took her hands in his.

‘Made me a better person.’

Donna pulled her hands away, resorting, as always, to her standard jokes. ‘Now then, don’t touch what you can’t afford, spaceman.’

They watched as Wilf and Netty started walking towards the main reception area. ‘Let’s get them back to your mum, eh?’

Donna nodded. ‘You coming too, then? I mean, you know what she’s like.’

The Doctor nodded. ‘Yeah. An older version of her daughter.’

‘Oi!’ Donna laughed and linked arms with the Doctor.

‘Come on, spaceman. You’ve stared down Sontarans, Pyroviles and the Fishmen of Kandalinga. I don’t really think my mum’s that scary.’

‘You don’t?’

‘Nah. Unless it’s Monday. Mondays, she gets one of her ’mares on. Is today Monday?’

‘Today is indeed Monday.’

Donna held him a bit tighter. ‘My turn to protect you then, eh?’

FRIDAY

A few days later, and mankind had, as it always did, coped and moved on. MorganTech had officially crashed and burned, it’s CEO and executive staff declared bankrupt in absentia.

The M-TEKs had been recalled and destroyed and a warrant was sent out for the arrest of Dara Morgan, until the truth was established about his identity (or at least the fact that he wasn’t Dara Morgan), at which point the whole MorganTech affair came under the jurisdiction of UNIT and vanished from public view. The people guarding the craters had woken up, completely baffled as to why they were there. They were arrested, but would no doubt all be freed once UNIT got involved.

The Noble family were heading to the RPS – Wilf was finally getting his dinner and the Naming Honour. Netty was with them, bustling around with Sylvia, getting ready, trying on hats with alarmingly larger feathers and

laughing at silly little things along with Donna’s mum.

Wilf and the Doctor had sensibly escaped to the back garden, drinking tea and discussing in hushed tones the Doctor’s various adventures with ‘the outer space robot people’, with each tale usually ending in uproariously raucous laughter.

Donna wandered through the patio doors to hush them.

‘You’ll have Mum wondering what you’re talking about, and then the game’s up.’

‘Not gonna tell her the truth, then?’ The Doctor raised an eyebrow at both of them.

A quick look shot between grandfather and granddaughter, followed in unison by ‘Are you mad?’

‘She’d definitely kill you this time,’ Donna said.

‘After killing me for keeping secrets,’ Wilf agreed.

The Doctor shrugged and changed the subject. ‘So, tonight’s little shindig. What time are you heading off?’

‘ We are heading off at seven,’ Donna said.

The Doctor opened his mouth to protest, to say the last thing he wanted was another RPS dinner, another chance to be pooh-poohed by Doctor Crossland or get into a long, dreary, conversation with Ariadne Holt about finger-painting or her terrifying lack of sartorial elegance.

‘Brilliant,’ he said unenthusiastically. ‘I may need to nip back to the TARDIS to, um, change my suit.’

Donna shook her head. ‘You are staying right here, Sonny Jim.’

‘Here?’

‘Here.’

‘No TARDIS? No suit?’

‘No TARDIS, no suit, no emergency calls from Princess Leia suggesting you’re her only hope.’ Donna swept up the tea mugs. ‘More tea?’