He asks me to call right now. I do it, and I’m surprised by the Cuban man’s reaction. He thanks me for being honest and for keeping his identity a secret and praises my knowledge on the subject. I thank him, tell him about the reaction to the article, and ask if we can arrange another meeting.
“But we talked for two hours! The material you have must be more than enough!”
That’s not the way journalism works, I explain. What was published used very little from those two hours. Most of it I had to research. Now I need to approach the subject in a different way.
My boss is still standing next to me, listening to my side of the conversation and gesturing. Finally, when the shaman is almost ready to hang up, I insist that the article was lacking. I need to explore the female role in this “spiritual” quest, and my boss’s wife would like to meet him. He laughs. I will never break the deal I made with him, but I insist that everyone knows where he lives and the days he works.
Please, take it or leave it. If you don’t want to take the conversation further, I will find someone who will. There is no shortage of people claiming to be experts in treating patients on the verge of nervous breakdown. Your method is different, but you aren’t the only spiritual healer in the city. Many others, mostly Africans, have contacted us this morning looking to bring visibility to their work, earn money, and meet important people who could protect them in the event of a possible deportation case.
The Cuban is reluctant at first, but his vanity and fear of competition finally speak louder. We arrange to meet at his house in the village of Veyrier. I’m eager to see how he lives—it will liven up the article.
We are in the small living room converted into an office in his home. On the wall are diagrams that look imported from India: the locations of energy centers, the soles of the feet with their meridians. Several crystals rest on top of a piece of furniture.
We’ve already had a very interesting conversation about the role of women in shamanist rituals. He explains to me that at birth we all have moments of revelation, and this is even more common with women. As any scholar can see, the goddesses of agriculture are always female, and medicinal herbs were introduced to cave-dwelling tribes by the hands of women. They are much more sensitive to the spiritual and emotional world, and this makes them prone to crises that doctors used to call “hysteria” and today are called “bipolar”—the tendency to go from absolute euphoria to profound sadness several times a day. For the Cuban man, the spirits are much more inclined to speak with women than with men, because they better understand a language that is not expressed in words.
I try to speak his language: Because of this oversensitivity, might there be the possibility of, say, an evil spirit driving women to do things we don’t want?
He doesn’t understand my question. I rephrase it. If women are unstable enough to go from happiness to sadness …
“Did I use the word ‘unstable’? I didn’t. Quite the contrary. Despite their heightened sensitivity, women are more steadfast than men.”
Like in love, for example. He agrees. I tell him everything that happened to me, and I begin to sob. He is unmoved. But his heart is not made of stone.
“When it comes to adultery, meditation helps little or not at all. In this case, the person is happy with what is occurring. They are maintaining the security of their relationship at the same time they experience adventure. It’s the ideal situation.”
What leads people to commit adultery?
“That’s not my area. I have a very personal view of the subject, but that shouldn’t be published.”
Please help me.
He lights some incense, asks me to sit in front of him with my legs crossed, and then settles into the same position. Previously severe, he now seems like a kind wise man, who is trying to help me.
“If married people, for whatever reason, decide to look for another partner, this does not necessarily mean that the couple’s relationship is not doing well. Nor do I believe that sex is the primary motive. It has more to do with boredom, with a lack of passion for life, with a shortage of challenges. It’s a combination of factors.”
And why does this happen?
“Because, ever since we’ve moved away from God, we live a fragmented existence. We try to find oneness, but we don’t know the way back; thus, we are in a state of constant dissatisfaction. Society prohibits and creates laws, but this does not solve the problem.”
I feel lighter, as if I’ve already acquired a different outlook. I can see it in his eyes: he knows what he’s saying because he’s already been through it.
“I met a man who was impotent when he was with his lover. Yet he loved being by her side, and she also felt good next to him.”
I can’t control myself. I ask if this man is him.
“Yes. My wife left me because of it. Which is no reason for such a drastic decision.”
And how did you react?
“I could have summoned spiritual assistance, but I would have paid for this in my next life. But I needed to understand why she had acted as she did. In order to resist the temptation to bring her back using magic, I started to study the subject.”
Grudgingly, the Cuban man takes on a professorial air.
“Researchers from the University of Texas in Austin tried to answer the question so many people pose: Why do men cheat more than women when they know that this behavior is self-destructive and will cause the people they love to suffer? The conclusion was that men and women have exactly the same desire to cheat as their partner. It just happens that women have more self-control.”
He looks at his watch. I ask that he please continue—perhaps he is glad to open up his soul.
“Brief encounters without any emotional involvement on the part of the man, and with the sole aim of satisfying sexual urges, enable the preservation and proliferation of the species. Intelligent women should not blame men for this. They try to resist, but they are biologically inclined to do it. Am I being too technical?”
No.
“Have you noticed how human beings are more frightened by spiders and snakes than by automobiles despite the fact that deaths from traffic accidents are much more frequent? This occurs because our minds are still living in caveman times, when snakes and spiders were lethal. The same thing happens with a man’s need to have multiple women. In those times he went hunting, and nature taught him that preservation of the species is a priority; you must get as many women pregnant as possible.”
And didn’t the women also think about preserving the species?
“Of course they did. But while man’s commitment to the species lasts, at most, eleven minutes, for the woman, each child means at least nine months of pregnancy. Not to mention having to take care of the offspring, feed it, and protect it from danger like spiders and snakes. So your instincts were developed differently. Affection and self-control became more important.”
He is talking about himself. He is trying to justify what he did. I look around at those Indian maps, the crystals, the incense. Deep down we’re all the same. We make the same mistakes and walk around with the same unanswered questions.
The Cuban man looks at his watch again and says our time is up. Another client will be arriving, and he tries to keep his patients from crossing paths in the waiting room. He gets up and walks me to the door.
“I don’t want to be rude, but please, don’t look me up again. I already told you everything I had to say.”
IT’S IN the Bible:
It happened, late one afternoon, when David arose from his couch and was walking on the roof of the king’s house, that he saw from the roof a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful. And David sent and inquired about the woman.