My knees were shaking and I felt a hundred years old. I guessed exhaustion had caught up with me as adrenaline poured out and was replaced by… something else.

I let my hair blow over my face and looked at Justin through the curtain. I opened my mouth to ask if he was alright, or maybe if he’d meant the kiss, but the whole world tilted and my knees buckled.

As unconsciousness took me, I sensed my fingers relax on the metal brace and felt myself begin to fall. My last impression was Justin’s horror-struck face and my last thought: at least I wouldn’t know about it when I hit the Darkness.

27

FROM THE FIRST MOMENT

“Tay, you have to wake up. I don’t know how long I can hold you.”

I didn’t want to wake up. I was comfortable, my hands were relaxed at my sides, dangling in a cool breeze, and someone had their arms around me.

“Tay, can you hear me?”

“Go away,” I murmured.

“You really don’t want me to do that.”

“Justin?” I frowned and opened my eyes.

Then I remembered. I jerked and clutched at him, scrambling for a safe foothold as well.

“Y-you caught me.”

He nodded and helped me move until I could sit carefully on a plank.

“Wait a minute, you’re on the same pole I am.”

His brow furrowed. “I thought it was because you were unconscious.”

I pursed my lips. “I’m awake now.”

I was gripping a crossbar with white knuckles. He knocked on the metal, sending some rust flaking off into the breeze.

Then the blood drained from my face as I realised: there was only one explanation. “I died.”

“You didn’t.” Justin pressed his hand against my forehead. “You’re burning up and you’re completely crazy, but you aren’t dead.”

“It’s the only way you could possibly be doing this.” I knocked on the same bar and it shivered.

“I caught you, Tay. You really are alive. Why don’t you wave at Tamsin, see if she waves back?”

I nodded, grateful for his suggestion. “You’re right.” I scooted carefully to the edge of the platform and waved.

After a moment James and Tamsin both raised their hands. James gave me a fist pump and Harley waggled his phone. They could see me. I wasn’t dead.

Relief flooded me and I slumped onto the boards, inhaling brick dust and letting the splinters prick my cheek.

Then I rolled. Justin was watching me.

“You kissed me,” I said and even I could hear my accusatory tone. He flushed but didn’t move. I rose onto my knees. “I know you’re in love with Tamsin, I see the way you look at her.”

He cleared his throat. “Is now the best time for this conversation?”

There was a gap between two of the boards I was resting on. If I put my eye to it I could see straight down through all the floors to the leering Darkness. “It might be the only time,” I whispered.

“OK.” Justin touched my hand, gently. “Tamsin’s hot. Who wouldn’t look at her? And I can’t believe she’s with James already. But, I’m dead, so I might as well tell you the truth.” He exhaled slowly. “The thing is I fancied you from the first moment you bitched at me about being in your chair. But that whole first year you barely said a single word to me. You only knew I existed when I pissed you off. Wiped your name off the whiteboard, nicked your pencil case, stuff like that.”

I blinked at him. “You were trying to make me notice you?”

“Guess I had to die to do it.” He shrugged.

“The others started to harass me and Hannah because they were copying you.” My mind took me back over our fall from grace, the big fight I’d had with Pete after I wouldn't date him, the day he left me and Hannah to the dogs.

Justin winced. “When Tamsin showed an interest I gave up. If I could change things, I would. I didn’t know what was going on with you.”

I pressed my lips together. “No one did. If I hadn’t been so wrapped up...”

“It wasn’t your fault. The reason Tamsin hates you so much, it’s because she knew how much I liked you back then.”

I snorted. “Tamsin’s jealous of me?”

Justin spread his hands. “At least a little.” He picked at his nails. “We’re together because of the club, you know? In the confessional she said she was in love with me.” He peered at her distant figure with sadness greying his eyes.

I gnawed on my lip as the wind whistled around our platform, tired of our intrusion into its domain. “Do you think Tamsin was involved?”

“No chance.” Justin touched my hand. “Things weren’t that great recently, but we’ve meant too much to each other over the last couple of years.”

I rocked onto my knees. “I guess we’ll find out soon enough. Are you sure they’ll tell the truth if I ask?”

Justin nodded. “This game is crazy. Look at what we do. Look at what you’re doing. You don’t break the rules, you just don’t. Plus they’ve got something on you now. If you try and break the silence of the confessional, you’ll be in trouble too.”

“Not as much as them.” I had to shout to be heard over the wind and I realised that the platform was creaking ominously. “We have to get back down.” I pressed my palm against his, throat welling up; he’d liked me all this time. If I hadn’t been blind, we could have had years. Instead, I got one kiss.

“Do... do you want to kiss me again?” My voice was hoarse. Some part of me still waited for him to push me away and laugh.

He didn’t; with shining eyes he pulled me close and pressed his lips once more to mine.

When my knees started to feel weak I pulled away. “It’s not safe doing this up here.” I gave a half laugh, but my head was spinning.

Justin stretched like a cat with a tin of tuna. “I feel great.” He grinned. “We should have done this before.”

“Sure.” I turned and started my careful descent. “But if we do it again, I’m going to be lying down.”

“Oh yeah?” He swung down to my level like Tarzan and I shoved him away, before tentatively toeing the next bar.

“I feel a bit woozy. Just watch me, will you?”

His smile was gentle and he put one hand on my back as I descended. “You can trust me.”

The nearer I got to the ground, the louder I could hear James and Harley whooping. Tamsin was quiet and her fists were clenched so tightly I imagined her nails were drawing blood.

“She does hate me,” I whispered. Justin, sitting next to me on a pole, nodded.

Then I saw Tamsin clutch James’ arm. Even in the semi-dark I could see her face whiten and she pointed with a trembling arm… right at Justin.

“She can see me.” Justin straightened.

“That’s impossible.” I patted his knee and swung myself down to the final platform. I was below the level of the fence now and the void was sucking at my soles like quicksand.

Justin jumped like a leopard to land next to me. “Look.” He turned me to face Tamsin and yes, it did look as if she could see her ex. Her mouth was slack and the whites of her cat-like eyes were showing.

“She’s just pissed that I did the dare, that’s all. That I made it down in one piece.”

“That’s not it.” Justin leaned towards Tamsin. James had his arm around her, talking intently, his hood bobbing under the light. “Tamsin.” Justin shouted and waved and James had to catch her as she squealed and collapsed.

“She can see me,” he insisted.

“She can’t.” I frowned. “The only other people in the world who’d be able to see you are related to me. And I promise you Tamsin Harper and I are not even distantly related.” As I spoke she calmed down, peering blindly into the spot that Justin still occupied. “See?”

Abruptly Justin yelped. He’d been standing on the pole right next to me, but now it was as if it had turned into water. He fell through the metal, toes first and I screamed. Like a diver being dumped into the ocean, he was heading right for the Darkness below.

There was no way I could reach him. There was only one thing I could do: get off the bar so he could touch it again. I threw myself off the platform, as far out away from the patch of boiling Dark as I could.