“He has the gift,” Aunt Märta says. “Yes, he truly has the gift.”

Stephie stays quiet.

A few weeks later she and Nellie are baptized. They don’t protest. And now that they’re members of the Pentecostal Church, they go to Sunday school every week.

Stephie has a feeling she ought to be different now that she’s been redeemed. Maybe nicer, more obedient. Surely that’s what Aunt Märta expects. But Stephie feels exactly the same as before. Sometimes she sits looking at the picture of Jesus above her dresser, trying to feel the love for him about which they speak at Sunday school, but she feels nothing in particular.

“Forgive me, Jesus,” she mumbles softly. “Forgive me if I’m not really and truly redeemed.”

Stephie doesn’t write to her mother and father about being redeemed or baptized. She doesn’t know how she could ever explain it. It might upset them. She wonders if a person can get un-redeemed later. Otherwise she’ll have to keep it secret forever, after the family is reunited.

At least Sunday school offers a break from their everyday routines. The Sunday school teacher is the girl who played the guitar. They often sing. A younger girl named Britta gives Stephie a bookmark angel with dark hair and a pink dress. She has another one, too, a blond one in a blue dress, but she doesn’t want to give that one away. Britta and Stephie are the same age, but Britta’s shorter. She has dull, straggly brown hair. Sometimes she walks Stephie partway home after Sunday school.

Vera doesn’t attend Sunday school. Stephie sees her now and then, but she’s always with the same group of girls, including the blonde whose father is the shopkeeper, plus another who’s much bigger and heavier.

The only one who ever says hello when Stephie sees them is Vera. The others just stare. Once, the blonde shouts something after her, but Stephie doesn’t catch the words.

thirteen

The schoolhouse for the older children is right in the middle of the village-a yellow, two-story wooden building with a clock over the entrance. On the other side of the street is a second building where the very youngest children’s classrooms are; it’s not much larger than a regular house.

Sometimes Stephie and Nellie pass the school buildings on their ramblings. If it’s recess and the children are out in the schoolyard the sisters walk slowly, peeking at the noisy boys and girls at play.

“When will we start school?” Nellie asks.

“As soon as our Swedish is good enough,” Stephie answers.

“I’m good at Swedish,” Nellie says with pride. “Auntie Alma says I’m a real chatterbox.”

It’s true that Nellie already speaks very good Swedish, better than Stephie. That’s because she can talk to both Auntie Alma and Elsa whenever she pleases. Aunt Märta isn’t exactly generous with words, and Uncle Evert is seldom home.

“We’ll be fluent enough to start school soon,” Stephie says. She gazes longingly over the fence, glimpsing a head of red hair that has to be Vera’s. If only Stephie were allowed to go to school, she’d see Vera every day and surely they’d become friends.

At dinner she tries extra hard to pronounce the Swedish words correctly. Hasn’t Aunt Märta noticed how much Swedish she has learned? As if she has been reading Stephie’s thoughts, Aunt Märta speaks up before she leaves the table.

“I was talking with Auntie Alma this afternoon. We think the time has come for you and Nellie to start school. You can’t just wander around all day long. I’m going to speak with the head teacher tomorrow, and I hope you’ll be able to start on Monday.”

The next morning Aunt Märta bikes over to the school. In the afternoon she tells Stephie she’ll be entering sixth grade.

“But I’ve already completed sixth grade,” Stephie protests. “Last year in Vienna.”

“You’re twelve, aren’t you?” Aunt Märta snaps. “So you will be in sixth grade with the other children your age. Where would you go if you weren’t? To the grammar school in Göteborg?”

After some time Stephie realizes that Swedish children start school at age seven, not at six as she did back home. So the children her age are in sixth grade, the final year of compulsory school.

Thinking about it, she sees it’s probably just as well to repeat sixth grade. She’s already missed nearly two months of the fall semester.

Besides, last year in Vienna she didn’t really learn very much. First her family had to move to the cramped room, and Stephie had to walk twice as far to school as before. In the crowded quarters, and with the noise of the other tenants, it wasn’t easy to concentrate on homework, either. Later in the year she had to change schools, when the Jewish children were no longer allowed to attend regular school.

The classrooms in the Jewish school were overcrowded, the teachers pale from exhaustion and worry. There were no gold stars for their exercise books.

The next day Aunt Märta goes to see someone and returns with a pile of schoolbooks. There’s a math book, a history book, a science book, an atlas, and a songbook. All are dirty and dog-eared, with the name Per-Erik penned in round, childish letters on the front page of each.

The books belonged to the same Per-Erik who is the youngest member of Uncle Evert’s fishing crew. He finished school two years ago. Now Stephie will have to use his old books. Aunt Märta even has a math exercise book with her, less than half full. Stephie stares at the books, blinking back her tears.

“Couldn’t I have a new exercise book of my own?” she asks softly.

“Hardly any of this one’s been used,” Aunt Märta tells her. “Finish it first, then you can have a new one.”

Stephie leafs through the roughly treated books. The spine of the science book is ragged. When she opens the book there is no resistance; it opens out like a broken fan. Some of the pages are loose. She remembers the feeling of opening a brand-new book: the way the spine won’t give when you try to open it wide, the smell of new paper.

“Don’t look so downhearted,” Aunt Märta scolds. “I don’t have money to waste on new books for your last year of school. Besides, you may not even be here for the entire school year. Old ones will do.”

They’ll do for me, Stephie finds herself thinking. Old, worn-out books will do for a foreign child. Old, worn-out books, not to mention an ugly, old lady’s bathing suit that will do for a refugee child who has to live off the charity of others. If Aunt Märta had a child of her own, that child would never be getting hand-me-down books.

“Here,” says Aunt Märta, holding out a roll of brown wrapping paper. “Once you’ve covered them they’ll look much nicer.”

Auntie Alma goes all the way to Göteborg to buy school books for Nellie. Aunt Märta sends some money along to buy the things Stephie still needs: two more exercise books, a few pencils, an eraser, and a New Testament.

“You’ll have the Testament for the rest of your life,” Aunt Märta tells her. “Schoolbooks are a different matter.”

Nellie’s books also get covered in brown paper.

“I promise to take very good care of them,” Nellie says.

When Auntie Alma’s back is turned, Stephie sticks out her tongue. “Butter her up all you can,” she teases.

“You’re just jealous,” Nellie tells her. “If you were a little nicer, you might get new books, too, you know.”

Almost immediately, Nellie regrets her words and extends her math exercise book to Stephie.

“You can have this one if you want,” she says.

“What would you do your math homework in, then?” Stephie asks.

“Math’s so boring,” Nellie answers, making a face.

On Saturday Uncle Evert comes home. He’s obviously been told that Stephie’s going to start school, because he has brought her a present wrapped in paper from a shop in Göteborg.