“How so?”

“Well, the real you would never go skydiving, for instance — but an immortal version, who knew he couldn’t be killed, might indeed take that up as a hobby.” Sarkar typed some commands. “And speaking of the immortal, let’s introduce ourselves to Ambrotos.” A few more keyclicks, then he spoke into the microphone. “Hello,” he said, “it’s me, Sarkar.”

No reply.

“Something must have gone wrong,” said Peter.

“I don’t think so,” said Sarkar. “All the indicators look fine.”

“Try again,” said Peter.

“Hello,” said Sarkar into the mike.

Silence.

“Maybe you erased whatever part controlled speech,” said Peter.

“I was very careful,” said Sarkar. “I suppose there could be some interaction I have overlooked, but—”

“Hello,” said a voice from the speaker at last.

“Ah,” said Sarkar. “There he is. I wonder what took so long?”

“Patience is a virtue,” said the voice. “I wanted to assess what was going on before I replied. I’m a simulacrum, aren’t I? Of Peter G. Hobson. But I’ve been modified to simulate an immortal being.”

“That’s exactly right,” said Sarkar. “How could you tell which sim you are?”

“Well, I knew you were going to create three. I wasn’t quite feeling myself, so I suspected I wasn’t the experimental control. After that, I simply asked myself if I felt horny. You know what they say — men think about sex once every five minutes. I figured if I was the after-death sim, sex would be the farthest thing from my mind. And it isn’t. I do want to get laid.” A pause. “But when I realized that it didn’t matter to me if it was this decade or next, that cinched it. This need for instantaneous gratification — it’s unseemly. You’re a perfect example, Sarkar: having a fit because I didn’t respond to your ‘hello’ right away. That kind of thinking seems so alien to me now. After all, I’ve got all the time in the world.”

Sarkar grinned. “Very good,” he said. “By the way, we’re referring to you as the Ambrotos simulacrum.”

“Ambrotos?” said the voice from the speaker.

Sarkar turned to Peter. “The first proof that our simulations are accurate,” he said, smiling. “We have successfully duplicated your ignorance.” He spoke into the mike. “Ambrotos is Greek for immortal.”

“Ah.”

“I’m going to let you continue to run in the background now,” Sarkar said. “I’ll talk to you again soon.”

“Sooner or later, it doesn’t matter,” said Ambrotos. “I’ll be here.”

Sarkar touched some keys. “Well, that one seems to work fine, too. Now for the trickiest one — Spirit, the life-after-death entity.” He touched more keys, calling up the final simulacrum. “Hello,” he said again. “It is me, Sarkar Muhammed.”

“Hello, Sarkar,” said a synthesized voice.

“Do you — do you know who you are?” asked Sarkar.

“I’m the late, lamented Peter Hobson.”

Sarkar grinned. “Exactly.”

“R.I.P. in RAM,” said the synthesized voice.

“You don’t seem too choked up about being dead,” said Sarkar. “What’s it like?”

“Give me a while to get used to it, and I’ll let you know.”

Peter nodded. That seemed fair enough.

CHAPTER 20

Two A.M. As he had most nights since Cathy had made her announcement, Peter was having trouble sleeping.

Ironically, according to the Hobson Monitor on the wall, Cathy was deep in REM sleep. Peter could hear her breathing next to him.

They had gone to bed at 11:30. Two and a half hours ago. Enough time to read a short book or watch a long movie, or, if he’d taped it and fast-forwarded through the commercials, to watch three episodes of an hour-long TV series.

But he’d done none of those things. He’d just lain there in the dark, tossing and turning occasionally, listening to the drone of the nighttable fans.

Peter’s mouth was dry, and he could use a pee. He got out of bed and made his way through the darkness out of the bedroom and down the stairs. He visited the main-floor bathroom, then ambled into the living room and sat on the couch.

The vertical blinds over the windows were closed, but illumination seeped in from the lamp out front. Staring at him like robot eyes were little red and green LEDs on surge protectors in several of the wall outlets. Various lights and a digital clock glowed on the face of the VCR. Peter patted the upholstery of the couch until he found the sleek black remote control. He turned on the TV and began to flip.

Channel 29, from Buffalo, New York: an infomercial, advertising a do-it-yourself at-home nose-job kit. Money-back guarantee.

Channel 22, the Canwest Global Network: Night Walk, the world’s cheapest Canadian content — a guy with a camcorder taking a late-night stroll down the streets of downtown. Amazing that he didn’t get mugged.

Channel 3, Barrie, Ontario. A rerun of Star Trek. Peter liked to play name-that-episode; a single frame was usually enough for him. This one was easy — one of the few shows done on location. And there was Julie Newmar in a blond wig. “Friday’s Child.” Hardly a great one, but Peter knew that in about ten seconds, McCoy would intone the classic “I’m a doctor, not an escalator.” He waited for the line, then flipped again.

Channel 12, the CBC French network. A pretty woman was on screen. Peter knew from long experience that when an attractive woman showed up at night on the French network, she’d be topless within five minutes. He thought about waiting for it, but decided to flip again.

Channel 47, Toronto: another infomercial. Genetically engineered toupees: the fake hair (actually a special strain of grass using a brown pigment instead of chlorophyll) would really grow, so even balding men could hear their friends say, “looks like time for a haircut, Joe.” Peter, who had a bald spot the diameter of a hockey puck, marveled at the vanity. Still, maybe his father-in-law would use such a thing.

He flipped again. The BBC World Service on CBC Newsworld.

A story about ethnic unrest in war-torn Brazil on CNN.

Teletext stock information.

The Weather Network, with tomorrow’s forecast for Auckland, New Zealand — as if anyone in Canada gave a damn.

Peter sighed. A vast wasteland.

As images flickered by, he thought about the simulacra that Sarkar had created.

Sarkar had removed traits from two of the sims.

Editing them. Snipping out the parts he didn’t want.

Maybe the knowledge of Cathy’s affair could be removed, too.

Maybe, then, the sims, at least, could get a good night’s sleep.

He wished his own memories could be edited as easily.

He could see the infomercial now. Feeling miserable about something? Guilty? Pained? Somebody wronged you? You did something wrong? Edit it out! Remove those troublesome memories. Save a fortune on therapy. Operators are standing by. Order now. Money-back guarantee.

I’m a doctor, not an escalator.

I’m a husband, not a doormat.

I’m a human being, not a computer program.

Three A.M. now. A new raft of infomercials. Episodes of The A-Team and Alien Blues and even good old Spenser: For Hire.

The Nikkei off 200 points.

Storms brewing in Kuala Lumpur.

“Peter?” It was Cathy’s voice, tenuous and faint.

He looked up. In the dim light, he could see her standing on the stairs in a black silk teddy. She hadn’t been wearing that when they’d gone to bed.

Peter instantly grasped the significance of the moment. It had been months since they had made love. He’d had no urge to do so, and she had seemed indifferent, too. But now, having awoken for perhaps the dozenth time in recent days and finding him gone from their bed, she was reaching out to him.

Peter didn’t know if he was ready to resume their physical relationship. He was no more in the mood today than he had been yesterday or the day before. But there she stood on the stairs, her face a mask, trying to conceal the emotions swirling beneath. To reject her now would be a mistake. Who knew when she’d next make an overture? Who knew when he would feel again like initiating something?