Someone with operational gray matter would never have let this happen to her. Someone with the intelligence of your average housefly would have put two and two together when Brandon had IM-ed her about “society nonsense.” Someone who had spent a moment examining her history, her experiences, or even the rational order of the universe would have noted at least one of the following:

1) Mr. Let’s-Define-Our-Relationship Weare had never professed any interest in discussing what we were really doing in our stolen afternoons.

2) The fact that after he told me he was going to make a decision, he never called again. Hello, clue phone.

3) Or how about the simple truth that when someone has the choice of the beautiful, polished, rich girl who has never broken his heart—the girl who would forgive his transgressions, would sacrifice her position in her society to make him happy—or the girl like me, it’s a no-brainer. Whatever else I might be tempted to say about Brandon at this moment, I’d never insult his intelligence.

Where do you go when this is made obvious to you? Other than back to Ohio? Part of me wondered if it was too late to book a flight. I wanted to be far, far from campus right now. I wanted to climb into my dad’s lap and hug my mom and act like I was still a teenager, instead of an adult who should have so known better. I wanted to hide, to flee, to pretend that I’d never even heard of Connecticut, let alone chosen it as a setting for such a humiliation. How could he love her more?

One thing was certain, I could not go back to my fellow knights yet. They were waiting for me just outside the library, but there was no way I could face anyone in my current state. There would be plenty of time to explain Dragon’s Head’s new strategy—after I dealt with my own state of mind. I pulled my coat’s hood low over my face and rushed back inside the Reading Room. Out in the main hall, I turned right, toward the back, rather than toward the front entrance. There was a back way out, near the law school.

A security guard stopped me. “Library’s closed, miss,” but as soon as he saw my face, his expression softened.

“I just want…” I gasped. “The back door.”

“Closed after midnight.”

“I just want to leave. I don’t have anything to check out…just…”

The guard relented and I rushed by him, practically sprinting on my way out the back. I shoved hard on the door and burst through into the cold alleyway beyond. I plopped against the nearest wall, heedless of the rain as it mixed with tears on my face. Great wracking sobs seemed to echo around the empty street, bouncing off stone walls and cobblestones. Yeah, there was no way I’d do this in front of the other knights. I imagined the patriarchs that had come before me weeping dignified tears over a lost comrade in war, or the death of a brother or a spouse. I couldn’t see them acting so stupid. No, this kind of behavior would be reserved for the Bugaboo of the group.

“Why?” I said to the buildings around me.

How could I question his choice? Maybe it was best. For if I did love him, if I really did, wouldn’t I have fought for him long before this? Wouldn’t I have fought for him when we tried dating last spring, or when I saw him again this fall, or even the first time he told me he still cared about me? Wouldn’t I have told him to stay with me that night, to really be with me, to tell Felicity right away that they were through for good?

If I’d really loved him, then I would have done what Felicity had. I would have picked him over Rose & Grave, I’d have put him first last spring, have shared my troubles with him rather than with the society brothers I’d only just met. I’d have called him back this fall instead of getting caught up in yet another society drama. I’d have run to him from the first moments of Dragon’s Head’s “little campaign of persuasion.” Wouldn’t I?

Eventually the tears dried, but I spent several long minutes just standing there, slumped, catching my breath, adjusting to this new reality, the one where I’d again added to my seemingly endless list of romantic mistakes. Chalk another one up, Amy. Not only are you crap at having a boyfriend, crap at having a one-night stand, and crap at having a no-strings-attached fling, you’re also crap at being the other woman. Pack it up, go home, commit to celibacy. You’re one hundred percent, unequivocally awful at being with a man.

I took a deep breath. There. Fine. Now you know. I looked up.

And saw Poe standing in the doorway across the street. I could make out little more than a glint of his gray eyes, the line of his jaw, his sharp cheekbones in his thin face, but still, I recognized him. His defiant stance, arms crossed over the chest of his worn wool jacket. I knew that pose. It was like the first time we’d met, when he’d interrogated me. Only worse, because here I was, as raw as hamburger, ready to crumble. My eyes began to burn, but whether it was a fresh batch of tears or suppressed rage, I couldn’t tell.

Why was he here? Why was he always, always, always around? Didn’t he have a life? Didn’t he have anything better to do?

“I take it the parley went poorly?” he asked, coming toward me.

“What are you doing here!” I snapped.

He rolled his eyes. “Amy, there are two exits to the library. I guessed—and rightly so—that your club would forget that, and I wanted to make sure there was no funny business on this side.”

“How did you even know this was going on?” I resisted the urge to run a hand across my no-doubt snotty nose.

“I have friends in the tomb.” Of course. He and Hale had always been buddy-buddy. He held out a small white square. A handkerchief. When I took it, he added, “I thought I’d only get involved if they tried something.”

“Otherwise you’d just sit here and spy?” I swiped at my face with the handkerchief. Of all the people to catch me at my most vulnerable, why the hell did it have to be Poe?

“I was afraid to interrupt you by moving. Seemed the lesser of two evils.” He stood there for a moment, hands in pockets.

“The greater being?”

“Leaving you here alone.”

“Well, you can go now,” I said, then realized how ungrateful that sounded. Even if he’d been sneaking around.

“That’s the thing. I can’t.” Hands still in pockets, eyes still downcast. “Malcolm would probably kill me if I didn’t, um, see to his little sib in her time of need.”

“Then don’t tell him.” Malcolm was in Alaska and hadn’t written me in a month. So much for big-sib solicitation.

“And then there’s that whole pesky oath of constancy I took. I’m supposed to stand by you.”

“You would think of that.”

He looked up, met my eyes with his serious, gray stare. “So would you, Amy.”

What a time to remind me. I hated my society oaths in this moment. I felt fresh tears and made use of the handkerchief again. I sensed his hand on my shoulder, and suddenly we were crossing the street to the alcove at the law school, and sitting on a sheltered bench, and he was…patting me, or something, landing awkward little strokes along my upper arm that were no doubt meant to be comforting.

“Calm down,” Poe said. “The parley was supposed to make things better. What did they say?”

“That it’s over,” I sniffed.

“In exchange for what?”

I shook my head in misery. “Nothing.”

“That’s not true.” He peered at me through the shadows. “What did you have to give them?”

“Nothing!” I repeated. “They got what they wanted without my help.”

“They found the statue?”

“No. It had nothing to do with the statue.” I hung my head. “You’ll be happy to know that I’ve been acting like the brain donor you always say I am.”

“I don’t think you’re stupid,” he said. “A troublemaker, yes, but that’s different.” He let his arm drop to his side.

Well, I’d been causing trouble for Brandon and Felicity, that was for sure.