“I remind myself of things,” she said. “Like what I’m supposed to do that day or what I want to do.”

I nodded. “Yes. You fill your head with thoughts. Here’s something scary: If you don’t recognize yourself, then who is the one who reminds you of who you are?”

Luyu stared blankly at me. She frowned. “Yeah, who is that?”

I smiled. “I couldn’t sleep for a week after Mwita pointed that out to me.”

“Any ideas about how to cure us of our forced chastity?” she asked after a moment.

“No.”

We were quiet again.

“Sorry,” Luyu said after a while. “I’m selfish.”

I sighed. “No. You’re not.” I shook my head. “All these things are important.”

“Onye, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what Diti said. I’m sorry that your father…”

“I refuse to call him my father,” I said looking at her.

“You’re right. I’m sorry,” Luyu carefully said. She paused. “He… he recorded it. He must have kept it.”

I nodded. I didn’t doubt that at all. Never had.

We ate dinner in silence and went to bed while the sun was still setting. Mwita watched me as I unbraided my long bushy hair. It was salted with sand from Diti’s bout of stupidity. I planned to brush it out and braid it into a large thick long braid until I got a chance to rebraid it into the many tiny braids I preferred.

“Will you ever cut it?” Mwita asked, as I brushed.

“No,” I said. “Don’t cut yours either.”

“We’ll see,” he said, he tugged at the hair on his face. “I do like this beard.”

“Me, too,” I said. “All wise men grow them.”

I couldn’t sleep. “You’re used to living like an animal in the sand,” Diti had said. Her words burned inside me like regurgitated bile. And then the way Binta had crept after her. Binta hadn’t spoken to me since the fight. Delicately, I moved Mwita’s arm from my waist and slipped away from him. I retied my rapa and left the tent. I could hear Luyu snoring in her tent and Fanasi’s deep breathing in his. I heard nothing when I got to Diti and Binta’s tent. I looked inside. They were gone. I cursed.

“Let’s just leave our things here while we go get them,” Luyu said.

I squatted near the cooling rocks, brooding. Had they really thought they could sneak away and be back before we missed them? Or maybe they hadn’t intended to return at all. Stupid, stupid idiot women, I thought.

Fanasi stood with his back to us. Where I was angry, Fanasi was distraught. He’d given up so much for Diti and she didn’t even take him along.

“Fanasi,” I said, getting up. “We’ll find her.”

“It’s still early,” Mwita said. “We pack everything, including Diti and Binta’s things, and go find them. When we do, we move on, no matter the hour.”

Fanasi insisted on carrying most of Diti’s things, at least what she’d left. She’d taken her backpack and some small items. Mwita carried Binta’s rolled-up tent. We used the light from the town to make our way over the low hills. As we walked, I sang softly to the breeze. I stopped singing. “Shh,” I said, holding up a hand.

“What?” Luyu whispered.

“Just wait.”

“I’ve got my palm-light handy,” Mwita said.

“No, just wait.” I paused. “We’re being followed. No noise. Relax.” I heard it again. Soft padding. Just behind me. “Mwita, your light,” I said.

The moment he flipped it on, Luyu screeched and ran to me. She tripped over her feet and ran into me hard enough to knock me over. “It’s… it’s…” she babbled, scrambling over me as she looked back.

“Just wild camels,” I said, pushing her off me and getting up.

“It licked my ear!” she shouted, rubbing vigorously at her very wet ear and hair.

“Yeah, that’s because you sweat all the time and you need a bath,” I said. “They like salt.” There were three of them. The one closest to me grumbled low in its throat. Luyu cowered close to me. I couldn’t fully blame her after the animal tribe attack we’d suffered.

“Hold the light up,” I told Mwita.

They each had two large humps and their fur was thick and dusty. They were healthy. The one nearest to me gruffed some more and took three aggressive steps toward me. Luyu whooped and scrambled behind me. I stood my ground. My singing had attracted them.

“What do they want?” Fanasi said.

“Shh,” I said. Slowly, Mwita moved in front of me. The camel approached him, bringing its soft face to his and sniffing. The other camels did the same. Mwita had just established his relationship with me to the camels and they understood-the male protects the female. He is the one to negotiate with. I admit it was good to have someone step in front of me for a change.

“They mean to travel with us a way,” Mwita said.

“I figured that,” I said.

“But look at them!” Luyu said. “They’re filthy and… wild.”

I heard Fanasi grunt agreement.

I scoffed. “And that’s why I don’t think we’re ready to visit a town. When you’re in the desert, you have to be in the desert. You accept sand in your clothes but not your hair. You don’t mind bathing outside in the open. You leave a bucket of excess station water for other creatures who might want some. And when people, any kind of people, want to travel with you, you don’t reject them unless they’re cruel.”

We continued on, this time with a trio of camels in tow. We reached the paved road before we reached the town. I stopped, experiencing mild déjà vu.

“I was six when I saw a paved road for the first time,” I said. “I thought that giants had made them. Like the ones in the Great Book.”

“Maybe they did,” Mwita said, walking past me.

The camels didn’t seem in the least bit curious about it. But once they were across, they stopped. We all walked several steps before realizing that they weren’t coming. The camels groaned loudly as they sat down.

“Come on,” I told them. “We’re just going to find our companions.” The camels didn’t budge.

“You think they sense something bad?” Mwita asked.

I shrugged. I loved camels but I didn’t always understand their behavior.

“Maybe they’ll wait for us,” Fanasi said.

“I hope not,” Luyu said.

“Maybe,” Mwita said. He stepped up to the camel and when he did so, all three of them roared at him. He jumped back.

“Let’s go,” I said. “If they’re not here when we get back, then so be it.”

CHAPTER 32

AS I SAW WHEN I FLEW OVER IT THE NIGHT BEFORE, on one side of the town, the land was hilly. We entered on the flatter side where there were shops selling paintings, sculptures, bracelets, and blown glass along with the usual items.

“Onyesonwu, put your veil on,” Mwita said. He’d wrapped his over his head, letting the thick green cloth fall low over his face.

“I hope they don’t think we’re sick,” I said, doing the same with my yellow veil.

“As long as people stay away from us,” Mwita said. When he saw the bothered look on my face, he said, “We’ll say we’re holy people.

We approached a cluster of large buildings. I glanced inside a window and saw bookcases.

“This must be their book house,” I said to Luyu.

“Yeah, well, if it is, then they have two,” she said.

The building to our left was also full of books.

“Ah ah,” Mwita said quietly, his eyes wide. “There are people in there, even at this late hour. You think they’re open to the public?”

The town was called Banza, a name that sounded vaguely familiar to me. And it was on Mwita’s map. We were off course, having traveled northwest instead of due west.

“We need to pay closer attention,” Mwita said, as we stood looking at his map.

“Easier said than done,” Luyu said. “The walking gets so monotonous you drift off. I can see how it happened.”

A few people looked at us with mild interest as they passed but that was all. I relaxed a little. Still, it was obvious that we weren’t from here. Where our garments were long and flowing pants and dresses and veils, these people wore tighter clothes and cloth tied tightly over their heads.