“Because he told me he was staying in Jersey overnight, and then coming right back home.”

“I’m running the card room right now, but did you ask G what time Jimmy was due back?”

I sighed. “No. Not yet. I’ll go ask him now.”

“I don’t know where the fuck your brother is,” G said when I stopped him on his way toward his office. “He shoulda had his ass back here with my package by early this afternoon.”

G was talking bad, but he sure didn’t look concerned.

“Well, do you know if he at least made it down there safe? What if he got into an accident? Or maybe the cops got him? Ain’t there somebody you can call in Jersey to see if they know where he is?”

G unlocked his office door and stepped inside. “If the cops had him he would have called. If he wrecked the car, the cops would have called. Jimmy’s smelling his fuckin nuts, that’s the problem. I thought I could trust him so I let him have a lot of area to move, and now the niggah’s trying to test me.”

I couldn’t believe this shit he was talking.

“G! You know damn well that boy ain’t testing you! Jimmy loves you! He put you over me, and if it ever came down to it he would die for you. How could you even fix your mouth to accuse him of being shady?”

He turned around and stared at me. “Money will do that shit to you. It makes a whole lot of niggahs act shady.” Then he left me standing there in the hall and closed the door in my face.

Now I was really scared, but I didn’t know what to do. Who could I call in Jersey? Nobody. I didn’t know the connect Jimmy was going to meet, and after what had happened to me in Camden, I didn’t wanna know none of those Jersey niggers neither.

I thought about Flex and wondered if Jimmy had told him anything. Other than going over to his territory in Taft projects, I had no way of getting in touch with Flex either.

I went to the coatroom and got my cute little swing coat and put it on. Since all I ever did was run out of the apartment and jump into Pacho’s warm ride, I never bothered with a hat or gloves unless it was way past cold and downright nasty outside. I knew I was gonna freeze like a mother, but I didn’t care. G was talking shit that didn’t make no sense, Gino was too busy to pay me any mind, and my brother was out there somewhere doing who knows what.

I cornered Moonie behind the bar and asked him for fifty dollars. He looked at me like I was crazy, but I think the tears coming out my eyes convinced him that I was desperate. I had never asked Moonie for anything before, and I gave less than a fuck about him running back and telling G, just as long as I had enough to get down to Taft Houses and talk to the man who had been the last person, as far as I knew, to see my baby brother.

Chapter Twenty-Two

There were hardly any cabs running at this time of night, especially in Harlem, but I managed to catch one that had a Black Pearl sign in the front window. It was cold as hell outside, and cute didn’t mean shit as I sat in the back of that taxi shivering and blowing into my bare hands.

“How much do you charge to wait for me?” I asked the driver when we pulled up outside the projects.

“Depends on how long. I gotta make a living, you know.”

Fuck you, I said under my breath. His ass would have charged me tourist rates anyway. Probably ten dollars for every two minutes, and I sure couldn’t afford that.

I paid him and got out the cab in front of the housing office and walked deeper into the projects. Taft wasn’t part of my stomping grounds and I didn’t know too many people over here. I tipped down the walkways in my heels and flimsy coat trying to play it cool and confident like I lived in one of the buildings and wasn’t down for no bullshit.

It was late but you know the freaks come out at night in New York, and corner runners were calling out to me from the doorways offering me crack and blow left and right. I knew my luck was bad when it started to snow. I was all for a white Christmas, but damn! Did it have to start right now? My A-line JuicyOriginal dress only let me move but so fast, and my coat sleeves were too wide to help keep my hands warm.

I was frozen by the time I made it to the building that Flex worked from. I wasn’t even on the porch good when he pulled open the door and came outside.

“Girl, what you doing out here by yourself this time of night?”

“H-hey Flex,” I said, shivering and going through the door as he stepped back and held it open. Inside the lobby wasn’t much warmer than it was outside. About half of the windows were busted out, and the other half were boarded over.

“What you doing down here, Juicy? Looking all frozen. Don’t you know it’s too damn cold to try to look fine tonight?” There were about six men hanging out in the hall, lookouts whose job it was to make sure that 5-0 didn’t rush in and catch nobody holding any product.

“Jimmy,” I said, following Flex into the stairwell so we could talk in private. “I’m looking for Jimmy. He made a run for G yesterday and was supposed to be back this afternoon. He didn’t show up yet, and I thought maybe he was down here with you.”

Flex shook his head. “Nah. He ain’t here. He did roll through yesterday, though, and I tried to get him to stay here with me, but that niggah loves him some G, so he stepped.”

I leaned against the hand railing. “Why would you want him to stay with you? What’s up with that?”

Flex reached out and took my hands. He had on some thick black gloves with fur sticking all out of them and he pulled them off his hands and put them on mine, warming me up. “Juicy. If anybody in the world should know what time it is with me, you and Jimmy should know. I told you a long time ago. I’ma be rich, girl. I’ma be holding all the stops one of these days, and I want you and Jimmy both to be down with me.”

“Boy, you crazy-”

“Didn’t I tell your grandmother I was gonna snatch you up and set you up for life? She believed me, so why the fuck don’t you?”

“Flex!” I damn near shouted. “This ain’t about you and me! This is about my brother, all right? This is about finding out where the fuck Jimmy is!”

He didn’t say nothing for a minute. Then that little bucktooth niggah snatched his gloves off my hands and put them back on his. My fingers missed that warm fur. “You fine, Juicy, but you stupid. You and Jimmy both. A niggah wanna put y’all down, and y’all don’t even know which line you should be standing on.”

“Boy, what the hell are you talking about?”

Flex looked sad and mad. “Nothing, Juicy.” He opened the door and pushed me back out of the stairwell. “Your brother ain’t here, but if he shows up again I’ll let him know you looking for him. Jimmy my niggah and I love him, but I can’t make his eyes see what his mind can’t believe is there.”

I followed Flex back out into the night, and as crazy as he was he still had the decency to help me catch a cab going uptown.

“You coulda been Mrs. Boykin,” Flex said, opening the cab’s door for me. “Tell this cabby to go on about his business and stay here with me, and you still can.”

I jumped into that cab so fast I broke the heel off my shoe. “Later, Fletcher,” I said, waiting for him to close the door. “I’ll check you later.”

When I got back to the Spot Jimmy still hadn’t showed up, even though I had been praying he’d be there when I walked inside, and I had already rehearsed how I was gonna curse his ass out for making me worry so much.

The next day was Christmas Eve, and he didn’t show up then either. I called his cell phone every thirty minutes and I almost wore a hole in the floor pacing, I was so scared of what might have happened to him.

I couldn’t eat anything because my nerves were too bad, and my head was banging from grinding my teeth together all night. I was searching through the medicine cabinet for a Tylenol when G called for me to come out the bathroom.