She was gone, the line disconnected, by her or by the old exchanges.
Chapter Twenty-One
I EVEN CAME WITH DHATT into his office the next day. “The more you’re a no-show, the more people wonder what the fuck’s going on and the more they’re going to notice you,” he said. As it was there were plenty of stares from his office colleagues. I nodded at the two who had tried halfheartedly to start an altercation with me.
“I’m getting paranoid,” I said.
“Oh no, they’re really watching you. Here.” He handed me Yallya’s cell phone. “I think that’s the last time you’re getting invited to supper.”
“What did she say?”
“What do you think? It’s her fucking phone; she was seriously pissed off. I told her we needed it, she told me to fuck off, I begged, she said no, I took it and blamed you.”
“Can we get hold of a uniform? For Yolanda …” We huddled over his computer. “Might get her through easier.” I watched him use his more up-to-date version of Windows. The first time Yallya’s phone rang we froze and looked at each other. A number appeared that neither of us knew. I connected without a word, still meeting his eyes.
“Yall? Yall?” A woman’s voice in Illitan. “It’s Mai, are you … Yall?”
“Hello, this isn’t Yallya actually …”
“Oh, hey, Qussim …?” but her voice faltered. “Who is this?”
He took it from me.
“Hello? Mai, hey. Yeah, he’s a friend of mine. No, well spotted. I had to borrow Yall’s phone for a day or two, have you tried the house? Alright then, take care.” The screen went dark and he handed it back. “That’s another fucking reason you can field this shit. You’re going to get a pissload of calls from her friends asking you if you still want to go for that facial or if you’ve seen the Tom Hanks movie.”
After the second and third such call, we no longer started when the cell rang. There were not many, however, despite what Dhatt said, and none on those topics. I imagined Yallya on her office phone, making countless angry calls denouncing her husband and his friend for the inconvenience.
“Do we want to put her in a uniform?” Dhatt spoke low.
“You’re going to be in yours, right? Isn’t it always best to hide in plain sight?”
“You want one too?”
“Is it a bad idea?”
He shook his head slowly. “It’ll make life easier for some of it… I think I can get through my side on police papers and my say-so.” Militsya , let alone senior detectives, trumped Ul Qoman border guards, without much trouble. “Alright.”
“I’ll do the talking at the Besźel entrance.”
“Is Yolanda okay?”
“Aikam’s with her. I can’t go back … Not again. Every time we do …” We still had no idea how, or by whom, we might be watched.
Dhatt moved too much, and after the third or fourth time he had snapped at one of his colleagues for some imagined infraction I made him come with me for an early lunch. He glowered and would not speak, staring at everyone who passed us.
“Will you stop?” I said.
“I am going to be so fucking glad when you’re gone,” he said. Yallya’s phone rang and I held it to my ear without speaking.
“Borlú?” I tapped the table for Dhatt’s attention, pointed at the phone.
“Bowden, where are you?”
“I’m keeping myself safe, Borlú.” He spoke in Besź to me.
“You don’t sound like you feel safe.”
“Of course not. I’m not safe, am I? The question is, how much trouble am I in?” His voice was very strained.
“I can get you out.” Could I? Dhatt shrugged an exaggerated what the fuck? “There are ways out. Tell me where you are.”
He sort of laughed. “Right,” he said. “I’ll just tell you where I am.”
“What else do you propose? You can’t spend your life in hiding. Get out of Ul Qoma and I can maybe do something. Besźel’s my turf.”
“You don’t even know what’s going on …”
“You’ve got one chance.”
“Help me like you did Yolanda?”
“She’s not stupid,” I said. “She’s letting me help.”
“What? You’ve found her? What…”
“Like I told you, I told her. I can’t help either of you here. I might be able to help you in Besźel. Whatever’s going on, whoever’s after you …” He tried to say something, but I did not let him. “I know people there. Here I can’t do a thing. Where are you?”
“… Nowhere. Doesn’t matter. I’ll … Where are you? I don’t want to—”
“You’ve done well to stay out of sight this long. But you can’t do it forever.”
“No. No. I’ll find you. Are you … crossing now?”
I couldn’t help glancing around and lowering my voice again. “Soon.”
“When?”
“Soon. I’ll tell you when I know. How do I contact you?”
“You don’t, Borlú. I’ll contact you. Keep this phone.”
“What if you miss me?”
“I’ll just have to call every couple of hours. I’m afraid I’m going to have to bother you, a lot.” He disconnected. I stared at Yallya’s phone, looked up at last at Dhatt.
“Do you have any fucking idea how much I hate not knowing where I can look?” Dhatt whispered. “Who I can trust?” He shuffled papers. “What I should be saying to whom?”
“I do.”
“What’s going on?” he said. “Does he want out too?”
“He wants out too. He’s afraid. He doesn’t trust us.”
“I don’t blame him one bit.”
“Neither do I.”
“I don’t have any papers for him.” I met his eye and waited. “Holy Light , Borlú, you going to fucking …” He whispered furiously. “Alright, alright, I’ll see what I can do.”
“Tell me what to do,” I said to him, without breaking my gaze, “who to call, what corners to cut, and you can fucking blame me. Blame me, Dhatt. Please . But bring a uniform in case he comes.” I watched him, poor man, agonise.
It was after 7 p.m. that night that Corwi called me. “We’re go,” she said. “I’ve got the paperwork.”
“Corwi, I owe you, I owe you.”
“Do you think I don’t know that, boss? It’s you, your guy Dhatt, and his ahem ‘colleague,’ right? I’ll be waiting.”
“Bring your ID and be ready to back me up with Immigration. Who else? Who else knows?”
“No one. I’m your designated driver, again, then. What time?”
The question, what is the best way to disappear? There must be a graph, a carefully plotted curve. Is something more invisible if there are no others around, or if it is one of many? “Not too late. Not like two in the morning.”
“I’m glad to fucking hear it.”
“We’d be the only ones there. But not in the middle of the day either; there’s too much risk someone might know us or something.” After dark. “Eight,” I said. “Tomorrow evening.” It was winter and the nights came early. There would be crowds still, but in the dim colours of evening, sleepy. Easy not to see.
IT WAS NOT ALL LEGERDEMAIN; there were tasks we should and did perform. Reports of progress to finesse, and families to contact. I watched and with occasional over-the-shoulder suggestions helped Dhatt construct a letter saying polite and regretful nothing to Mr. and Mrs. Geary, whose main liaison now was with the Ul Qoma militsya . It was not a good feeling of power, to be present a ghost in that holding message, knowing them, seeing them from inside the words which would be like one-way glass, so they could not look back in and see me, one of the writers.
I told Dhatt a place—I did not know the address, had to describe it in vague topography, which he recognised—a piece of parkland walking distance from where Yolanda hid, to meet me at the end of the following day. “Anyone asks, tell them I’m working from the hotel. Tell them about all the ridiculous paperwork hoops they make us jump through in Besźel, that keep me busy.”
“It’s all we ever fucking talk about, Tyad.” Dhatt could not stay in one place, he was so anxious, so frenetic with lack of trust, in anything, so troubled. He did not know where to look. “Blame you or not, I’m going to be on school liaison for the rest of my fucking career.”