I took it wordlessly, immediately recognizing the scrawled writing. Seth’s. To a lot of people it would be undecipherable, but I’d had a lot of practice in decoding his sloppy penmanship.

Georgina,

When I woke up without you in Mazatlán, I was so angry. I felt betrayed and abandoned and wondered if you’d been playing me the entire time. Then, the more I thought about your words, the more my life began to come into focus. I still don’t want to deal with the mess here in Seattle. I don’t want to face Maddie. I don’t want to face myself. But, I realized, I do want you to be proud of me.

Maybe “proud” isn’t the right word. Respect? Like? Love? I’m not sure, but the events at Erik’s have still left an impression. Really, lying in your arms has left an impression. I meant what I said: I’d rather be alone than not be with you. Even apart, though, I can’t stand the thought of you being disappointed in me. To regain your good opinion, I would risk almost anything. I’d even come back here to face my demons.

And I have come back here, despite how much I wish I could run away. Disappearing won’t erase the bad things around me, however. Maybe you’re a messenger of some sort, some agent of destiny. If not for you, I almost certainly wouldn’t have returned, but it turns out I needed to. Terry and Andrea received their results yesterday. She only has months to live, something that I’d almost swear was the doctor’s joke. Only a few weeks ago, she seemed perfectly fine. I don’t want to face that, any more than I want to face everything else. But they need me more than ever now, and I love them. I love them so much that I realize my own life and wants don’t matter. As soon as I finish this book, I’m putting everything else—even the new series—on hold. None of it matters. Only they do. They’ll need me in the next few months. They’ll need me more in the months after that.

I don’t know when we’ll see each other again—though you’ll notice I say “when” and not “if.” Like I mentioned in Mexico, I know better than to think the universe will keep us apart. Regardless, I want you to be happy wherever your life takes you—and I hope someday I can be worthy of your respect again.

I also want you to know that in returning, I don’t expect anything from you. I just wanted to make sure you understood what I did…and how you’ve affected me.

—Seth

I looked up at Roman, who had been studying me while I read. I didn’t know what astonished me more: Seth returning—because of me—or the god-awful news about Andrea. Both were monumental in their own ways. One was a tragedy of epic proportions.

I swallowed, afraid if I fully processed it all, I’d start crying. “I’m not sure how much more I can handle tonight,” I said in a small voice.

Roman’s face was a mixture of sympathy and cynicism. “Well, you’ve got one more thing.”

He handed me a magazine. It was a trashy celebrity gossip one that was a popular source of mockery over at the bookstore. I couldn’t imagine why he was giving something so trivial to me, in light of everything else that had gone on. One page was marked with a Post-it, and I flipped to it.

It was a spread of assorted celebrity shots, the kind of candids that paparazzi delighted in: actors out with their children, pop stars spotted in Las Vegas nightclubs. I skimmed over the two pages, feeling a frown grow on my face as I tried to figure out why on earth I’d care about this right now.

Then, I found it. It was a small picture, shoved off to the side between much more interesting and larger ones of badly dressed actors. The caption read: Best-selling author Seth Mortensen enjoys some natural beauty in Mazatlán.

And it showed Seth and me kissing on the beach.

Chapter 24

“This…isn’t possible,” I said.

“I don’t know,” said Roman dryly. “Looks pretty possible to me.”

“But Seth’s an author. These kinds of magazines don’t care about people like him.”

“He’s so commonplace for you that you don’t realize how famous he is. And, hey, if it’s a slow week, they probably take what they can get. Sex sells—and that’s pretty sexy.”

I looked down at it again. It was pretty sexy. They’d taken it when I’d been lying on top of Seth, and the sarong had slipped enough that I was showing an awful lot of skin. Nausea rolled through me.

“Maybe no one will see this.” Yet, even as the words left my lips, I knew that was wishful thinking on my part. As I’d noted before, this magazine was a favorite at the store, largely because of its outrageously ridiculous articles. Someone, somewhere was going to see this picture. And while the articles might be fabrications, a photo like this—which clearly showed our faces—could hardly lie.

I let the magazine fall to the floor. “I can’t…I can’t deal with this. Not after everything else.”

Roman frowned, legitimate concern filling his features. I don’t think he was happy about either the picture or Seth’s new resolve, but it had to be obvious that more than these bits of news were plaguing me.

“Georgina, what else is—”

I held a hand up. “Not now. Tomorrow. We’ll talk tomorrow. Too much…too much has happened tonight.” Erik’s lifeless eyes flashed in my mind. “It makes this seem like nothing.”

He hesitated, then nodded. “Okay. You want to set aside some time for tomorrow night? I don’t mean a date. Just, I don’t know. Get dinner, talk about all this so it doesn’t eat you up. I really am worried about you.”

I started to say he shouldn’t worry, that I’d be okay, but I backed off. I really didn’t know if I was. “I’d like that,” I said honestly. “If my damage control doesn’t conflict, then sure. I’ll tell you all about it.” I stood up wearily. “But now—bed.”

He let me retreat to my bedroom, his heart in his eyes. It made me feel worse, largely because of what a low priority his feelings were for me right now. Obviously, they were important to him, and I appreciated his ardor. And his feelings did mean something to me. There was something very sweet and comforting in his offer to breathe and just talk. But in light of everything else going on? I couldn’t allow myself to process anything too deep with our relationship right now.

Particularly when I had to face the gauntlet at the bookstore the next day. I’d had a number of past times entering Emerald City where I’d been met with curious and covert looks. More often than not, it had been over something ridiculous, and I’d had no clue until later. Today, I knew exactly what was going on. There was no question that the damned magazine had gotten around.

And the looks this time weren’t inquisitive or smug. They were accusatory. Disdainful. I couldn’t face them. Not yet. I hurried through the store as quickly as I could, seeking my office—which I vowed not to leave for the rest of my shift. It was pretty hypocritical, considering my judgment on Seth avoiding his problems. Only, I didn’t have as much luck getting away from mine.

Maddie was sitting at my desk.

I hadn’t seen her in a week, not since she’d come to my condo. I’d told her then she could have indefinite leave from work and hadn’t expected to see her back anytime soon. Now she stopped me dead in my tracks.

Her face was much calmer than I would have expected. No, it was more than calm. It was still. Perfectly, eerily still. Like a sculpture. And when she looked up at me, it was like looking into the eyes of the dead. Cold. Emotionless. Nonetheless, I shut the door, fearing what was to come.

“I had a million theories, you know.” Her voice was as flat as her expression. “Never, ever did I consider this one. I mean, I wondered if there could have been another woman. But I never thought it’d be you.”