School Reopens

In the autumn, all the children go back to school, except us.

We say to Grandmother:

"Grandmother, we never want to go to school again." She says:

"I should hope not. I need you here. And what more could you learn at school anyway?"

"Nothing, Grandmother, absolutely nothing." Soon we receive a letter. Grandmother asks: "What does it say?"

"It says that you are responsible for us and that we must report to the school." Grandmother says:

"Burn the letter. I can't read, and you can't either. No one ever read that letter."

We burn the letter. Soon we get a second. It says that if we don't go to school, Grandmother will be punished by law. We burn that letter too. We say to Grandmother:

"Grandmother, don't forget that one of us is blind and the other deaf."

A few days later, a man turns up at our house. He says:

"I am the inspector of primary schools. You have in your house two children of compulsory school age. You have already received two warnings about this matter."

Grandmother says:

"You mean letters? I can't read. The children can't either."

One of us asks:

"Who is it? What's he saying?"

"He's asking if we can read. What's he like?"

"He's tall and looks mean."

We both shout:

"Go away! Don't hurt us! Don't kill us! Help!"

We hide under the table. The inspector asks Grandmother:

"What's the matter with them? What are they doing?"

Grandmother says:

"Oh! The poor things are afraid of everybody! They've lived through such terrible things in the Big Town. What's more, one of them is deaf and the other blind. The deaf one has to explain to the blind one what he sees, and the blind one has to explain to the deaf one what he hears. Otherwise, they don't understand anything."

Under the table, we yell:

"Help, help! It's blowing up! It's making too much noise! It's blinding my eyes!"

Grandmother explains:

"When someone frightens them, they hear things and see things that aren't there."

The inspector says:

"They have hallucinations. They should be treated in a hospital."

We yell even louder.

Grandmother says:

"Nothing could be worse! It was in a hospital that the misfortune happened. They were visiting their mother, who worked there. When the bombs fell on the hospital, they were there, they saw the wounded and the dead; they themselves were in a coma for several days."

The inspector says:

"Poor kids. Where are their parents?"

"Dead or missing. Who knows?"

"They must be a very heavy burden for you."

"What can you do? I'm all they have in the world."

Before leaving, the inspector shakes Grandmother's hand:

"You're a very brave woman."

We receive a third letter that says we are exempted from attending school because of our infirmity and our psychic trauma.

Grandmother Sells Her Vineyard

An officer comes to Grandmother's to ask her to sell her vineyard. The army wants to put up a building on her land for the frontier guards. Grandmother asks:

"And what will you pay me with? Money is worth nothmg.

The officer says:

"In exchange for your land, we'll install running water and electricity in your house." Grandmother says:

"I don't need your electricity or your running water. I've always lived without." The officer says:

"We could also take your vineyard without giving you anything in exchange. And that's what we're going to do if you don't accept our offer. The army needs your land. It is your patriotic duty to give it to us."

Grandmother opens her mouth to speak, but we intervene:

"Grandmother, you are old and tired. The vineyard gives you a lot of work and hardly brings anything in. On the other hand, the value of your house will increase a great deal with water and electricity."

The officer says:

"Your grandsons are more intelligent than you, Grandmother."

Grandmother says:

"You can say that again! So talk it over with them. Let them decide."

The officer says:

"But I need your signature."

"I'll sign whatever you like. Anyway, I can't write."

Grandmother starts to cry, gets up, and says to us:

"I'll leave it to you."

She goes off to her vineyard.

The officer says:

"Ah, she's very fond of her vineyard, the poor old woman. Well, is it a deal?"

We say:

"As you yourself have observed, that land has great sentimental value to her, and the army would certainly not want to usurp the hard-earned property of a poor old woman who, moreover, is a native of the country of our heroic Liberators."

The officer says:

"Ah, yes? She's a native…"

"Yes. She speaks their language perfectly. And we do too. And if you have any intention of committing an abuse…"

The officer says very quickly:

"No, no! What do you want?"

"In addition to the water and electricity, we want a bathroom."

"You don't say! And just where do you want this bathroom?"

We take him into our room and show him where we want our bathroom.

"Here, giving onto our room. Seven to eight square meters. Built-in bathtub, washbasin, shower, water heater, toilet."

He looks at us for a long time, then says:

"It can be done."

We say:

"We would also like a wireless set. We don't have one, and it's impossible to buy one."

He asks:

"And is that all?"

"Yes, that is all."

He bursts out laughing:

"You'll have your bathroom and your wireless. But I'd have been better off talking to your grandmother."

Grandmother's Illness

One morning, Grandmother doesn't come out of her room. We knock on her door, we call her, but she doesn't answer.

We go to the back of the house and break a pane of glass in her window so we can get into her room.

Grandmother is lying on her bed. She isn't moving. But she is breathing, and her heart is beating. One of us stays with her, the other fetches a doctor.

The doctor examines Grandmother. He says:

"Your Grandmother has had an attack of apoplexy, a cerebral hemorrhage."

"Is she going to die?"

"You can't tell. She's old, but her heart is sound. Give her these medicines three times a day. And she'll need someone to look after her."

We say:

"We'll look after her. What has to be done?"

"Feed her, wash her. She'll probably be permanently paralyzed."

The doctor leaves. We make a purée of vegetables and feed Grandmother with a small spoon. By evening, it smells very bad in her room. We lift her blankets: her straw mattress is full of excrement.

We get some straw from a peasant and buy babies' rubber pants and diapers.

We undress Grandmother, wash her in our bathtub, and make her a clean bed. She is so thin that the babies' pants fit her very well. We change her diapers several times a day.

A week later, Grandmother begins to move her hands. One morning, she greets us with a volley of insults:

"Sons of a bitch! Go roast a chicken! How do you expect me to get my strength back with your plant life and your purées? I want some goat's milk too! I hope you haven't neglected anything while I've been ill!"

"No, Grandmother, we haven't neglected anything."

"Help me get up, you good-for-nothings!"

"Grandmother, you must stay in bed, the doctor said so."

"The doctor, the doctor! That imbecile! Permanently paralyzed, indeed! I'll show him how paralyzed I am!"

We help her get up, accompany her to the kitchen, and sit her down on the seat. When the chicken is cooked, she eats it all herself. After the meal, she says:

"What are you waiting for? Make me a good stout stick, hurry up, you lazybones, I want to go see if everything is in order."