“Hey!” the kid screamed. With the mask off, he looked about eleven years old. Still, he sounded more outraged than fearful.
“Gimme that back, that’s mine, I won it! What do you think you’re-” Norman reached out again, took the kid’s face in his hand, and shoved him backward, hard. The side of the South Seas Adventure ride was canvas, and the kid went billowing through it with his expensive sneakers flying up in the air.
“Tell anybody, I’ll come back and kill you,” Norman said into the still-billowing canvas. Then he walked rapidly toward the midway, pulling the bullmask down over his head. It stank of rubber and its previous owner’s sweaty hair, but neither smell bothered Norman. The thought that the mask would soon also stink of Gertie’s piss did. Then his mind took another of those skips, and he disappeared into the ozone for awhile. When he came back this time, he was trotting into the parking lot at the end of Press Street with one hand pushing against his ribcage on the right side, where every breath was now agony. The inside of the mask smelled exactly as he had feared it would and he pulled it off, gasping gratefully at cool air which didn’t stink of piss and pussy. He looked down at the mask and shivered-something about that vapid, smiling face creeped him out. A bull with a ring through his nose and garlands of posies on his horns. A bull wearing the smile of a creature that has been robbed of something and is too stupid to even know what it is. His first impulse was to throw the goddam thing away, but he restrained himself. There was the parking-lot attendant to think about, and while he would undoubtedly remember a man driving off in a Ferdinand the Bull mask, he might not immediately associate that man with the man the police were shortly going to be asking about. If it bought him a little more time, the mask was worth holding onto. He got behind the wheel of the Tempo, tossed the mask onto the seat, then bent and crossed the ignition wires. When he bent over that way, the smell of piss coming off his shirt was so tart and clear that it made his eyes water. Rosie says you’re a kidney man, he heard Dirty Gertie, the jiggedy-jig from hell, say inside his head. He was terribly afraid she’d always be inside his head now-it was as if she had somehow raped him, and left him with the fertilized seed of some malformed and freakish child. You’re one of those shy guys who don’t like to leave marks. No, he thought. No, stop it, don’t think about it. She left you a little message from her kidneys, by way of my kidneys… and then it had flooded his face, stinking and as hot as a childhood fever.
“No!” This time he screamed it aloud, and brought his fist down on the padded dashboard.
“No, she can’t! She can’t! SHE CAN’T DO THAT TO MEI” He pistoned his fist forward, slamming it into the rear-view mirror and knocking it off its post. It struck the windshield and rebounded onto the floor. He lashed out at the windshield itself, hurting his hand, his Police Academy ring leaving a nest of cracks that looked like an oversized asterisk. He was getting ready to start hammering on the steering wheel when he finally got hold of himself. He looked up and saw the parking-lot ticket tucked under the sun-visor. He focused on that, working to get himself under control. When he felt he had some, Norman reached into his pocket, took out his cash, and slipped a five from the moneyclip. Then, steeling himself against the smell (except there was really no way you could defend yourself against it), he pulled the Ferdinand mask back down over his head and drove slowly over to the booth. He leaned out of the window and stared at the parking attendant through the eyeholes. He saw the attendant grab for the side of the booth’s door with an unsteady hand as he bent forward to take the offered bill, and Norman realized an utterly splendid thing: the guy was drunk.
“Viva ze bool,” the parking-lot attendant said, and laughed.
“Right,” the bull leaning out of the Ford Tempo said.
“El toro grande.”
“That’ll be two-fifty-”
“Keep the change,” Norman said, and pulled out. He drove half a block and then pulled over, realizing that if he didn’t get the goddam mask off his head right away he was going to make things exponentially worse by puking into it. He scrabbled at it, pulling with the panicky fingers of a man who realizes he has a leech stuck on his face, and then everything was gone for a little while, it was another of those skips, with his mind lifting off from the surface of reality like a guided missile. When he came back to himself this time he was sitting barechested behind the steering wheel at a red light. On the far corner of the street, a bank clock flashed the time: 2:07 p.m. He looked around and saw his shirt lying on the floor, along with the rear-view mirror and the stolen mask. Dirty Ferdie, looking deflated and oddly out of perspective, stared up at him from blank eyes through which Norman could see the passenger-side floormat. The bull’s happy, sappy smile had wrinkled into a somehow knowing grin. But that was all right. At least the goddam thing was off his head. He turned on the radio, not easy with the knob busted off, but perfectly possible, oh yes. It was still tuned to the oldies station, and here was Tommy James and the Shondells singing
“Hanky Panky.” Norman immediately began to sing along. In the next lane, a man who looked like an accountant was sitting behind the wheel of a Camry, looking at Norman with cautious curiosity. At first Norman couldn’t understand what the man was so interested in, and then he remembered that there was blood on his face-most of it crusting now, by the feel. And his shirt was off, of course. He’d have to do something about that, and soon. Meanwhile… He leaned over, picked up the mask, slipped one hand into it, and gripped the rubber lips with the tips of his fingers. Then he held it up in the window, moving the mouth with the song, making Ferdinand sing along with Tommy James and the Shondells. He rolled his wrist back and forth, so Ferdinand also appeared to be sort of bopping to the beat. The man who looked like an accountant faced forward again quickly. Sat still for a moment. Then leaned over and banged down the doorlock on the passenger side. Norman grinned. He tossed the mask back on the floor, wiping the hand that had been inside it on his bare chest. He knew how weird he must look, how nuts, but he was damned if he was going to put that pissy shirt back on again. The motorcycle jacket was lying on the seat beside him, and at least that was dry on the inside. Norman put it on and zipped it up to the chin. The light turned green as he was doing it, and the Camry beside him exploded through the intersection like something fired from a gun. Norman also rolled, but more leisurely, singing along with the radio:
“I saw her walkin on down the line… You know I saw her for the very first time… A pretty little girl, standin all alone… Hey, pretty baby, can I take you home?” It made him think of high school. Life had been good back then. No sweet little Rose around to fuck everything up, cause all this trouble. Not until his senior year, at least. Where are you, Rose? he thought. Why weren’t you at the bitch-picnic? Where the fuck are you? “she’s at her own picnic,” ze bool whispered, and there was something both alien and knowing in that voice-as if it spoke not in speculation but with the simple inarguable knowledge of an oracle. Norman pulled over to the curb, unmindful of the NO PARKING LOADING ZONE sign, and snatched the mask up off the floor again. Slid it over his hand again. Only this time he turned it toward himself. He could see his fingers in the empty eyesockets, but the eyesockets seemed to be looking at him, anyway.
“What do you mean, her own picnic?” he asked hoarsely. His fingers moved, moving the bull’s mouth. He couldn’t feel them, but he could see them. He supposed the voice he heard was his own voice, but it didn’t sound like his voice, and it didn’t seem to be coming from his throat; it seemed to be coming out from between those grinning rubber lips. “she likes the way he kisses her,” Ferdinand said.