“Out of my way, Gerald,” she said, and kicked him (denying the enormous satisfaction it gave her even as it welled up inside). Gerald refused to move. It was as if the chemical changes which were part of his decay had bonded him to the floor. The flies rose in a buzzing, disturbed cloud just above his distended midsection.
That was all.
“Fuck it, then,” Jessie said. She began to push the bed again. She managed to step over Gerald with her right foot, but her left came down squarely on his belly. The pressure created a ghastly buzzing sound in his throat and forced a brief but filthy breath of gas from his gaping mouth. “Excuse yourself, Gerald,” she muttered, and then left him behind without another look. It was the bureau she was looking at now, the bureau with the keys resting on top of it.
As soon as she had left Gerald behind, the blanket of disturbed flies resettled and resumed their day’s work. There was, after all, so much to do and so little time in which to do it.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
Her biggest fear had been that the foot of the bed would try to hang up either in the bathroom door or the far corner of the room, making it necessary for her to back and fill like a woman trying to shoehorn a big car into a small parking space. As it turned out, the rightward-tending arc the bed described as she moved it slowly across the room was almost perfect. She only had to make a single mid-course correction, pulling her end of the bed a little farther to the left so she could be sure the other end would clear the bureau. It was while she was doing this-pulling with her head down and her butt out and both arms wrapped tightly around the bedpost-that she suffered her first bout of lightheartedness… only as she lay with her weight against the post, looking like a woman who is so drunk and tired that she can only stand up by pretending to dance cheek-to-cheek with her boyfriend, she thought that darkheadedness would probably be a better way to describe it. The dominant feeling was one of loss-not just of thought and will but of sensory input as well. For one confused moment she was convinced that time had whiplashed, flinging her to a place that was neither Dark Score nor Kashwakamak but some other place entirely, a place that was on the ocean rather than any inland lake. The smell was no longer oysters and pennies but sea-salt. It was the day of the eclipse again, that was the only thing that was the same. She had run into the blackberry tangles to get away from some other man, some other Daddy who wanted to do a lot more than shoot his squirt on the back of her panties. And now he was at the bottom of the well.
Deja vu poured over her like strange water.
Oh Jesus, what is this? she thought, but there was no answer, only that puzzling image again, one she hadn’t thought of since she had returned to the sheet-divided bedroom to change her clothes on the day of the eclipse: a skinny woman in a housedress, her dark hair put up in a bun, a puddle of white fabric beside her.
Whoa, Jessie thought, clutching at the bedpost with her tattered right hand and trying desperately to keep her knees from buckling. Hold on, Jessie-just hold on. Never mind the woman, nevermind the smell, never mind the darkness. Hold on and the darkness willpass.
She did, and it did. The image of the skinny woman kneeling beside her slip and looking at the splintered hole in the old boards went first, and then the darkness began to fade. The bedroom brightened again, gradually taking on its former five o'clock autumn hue. She saw motes of dust dancing in the light slanting in through the lakeside windows, saw her own shadow-legs stretching across the floor. They broke at the knees so that the rest of her shadow could climb the wall. The darkness pulled back, but it left a high sweet buzzing in her ears. When she looked down at her feet she saw they too were coated with blood. She was walking in it, leaving tracks in it.
You’re running out of time, Jessie.
She knew.
Jessie lowered her chest to the headboard again. Getting the bed started was harder this time, but she finally managed it. Two minutes later she was standing next to the bureau she had stared at so long and hopelessly from the other side of the room. A tiny dry smile quivered the corners of her lips. I’m like a woman who’sspent her whole life dreaming of the black sands of Kona and can’t believeit when she’s finally standing on them, she thought. It seems like justanother dream, only maybe a little more real than most, because in thisone your nose itches.
Her nose didn’t itch, but she was looking down at the crumpled snake of Gerald’s tie and the knot was still in it. That last was the sort of detail even the most realistic dreams rarely supplied. Beside the red tie were two small, round-barrelled keys, clearly identical. The handcuff keys.
Jessie raised her right hand and looked at it critically. The third and fourth fingers still hung limply. She wondered briefly just how much nerve-damage she had done to her hand, then dismissed the thought. It might matter later on-as some of the other things she had dismissed for the duration of this gruelling fourthquarter drive downfield might matter later on-but for the time being, nerve-damage to her right hand was no more important to her than the price of hogbelly futures in Omaha. The important thing was that the thumb and first two fingers on that hand were still taking messages. They shook a little, as if expressing shock at the sudden loss of their lifelong neighbors, but they still responded.
Jessie bent her head and spoke to them.
“You have to stop doing that. Later on you can shake like mad, if you want, but right now you have to help me. You have to.” Yes. Because the thought of dropping the keys or knocking them off the bureau after getting this far… that was unthinkable. She stared sternly at her fingers. They didn’t stop trembling, not entirely, but as she watched, their jitters quieted to a barely visible thrumming.
“Okay,” she said softly. “I don’t know if that’s good enough or not, but we’re going to find out.”
At least the keys were the same, which gave her two chances. She found nothing at all strange in the fact that Gerald had brought them both; he was nothing if not methodical. Planning for contingencies, he often said, was the difference between being good and being great. The only contingencies he hadn’t planned on this time were the heart attack and the kick which had provoked it. The result, of course, was that he was neither good nor great, only dead.
“The doggy’s dinner,” Jessie muttered, once again having no idea at all she was speaking aloud. “Gerald used to be a winner, but now he’s just the doggy’s dinner. Right, Ruth? Right, Punkin?
She tweezed one of the small steel keys between the thumb and forefinger of her sizzling right hand (as she touched the metal, that pervasive feeling that all this was a dream occurred), picked it up, looked at it, then looked at the cuff which enclosed her left wrist. The lock was a small circle pressed into its side; to Jessie it looked like the sort of doorbell a rich person might have at the tradesman’s entrance of the manor house. To open the lock, you simply stuck the hollow barrel of the key into the circle until you heard it click into place, then turned it.
She lowered the key toward the lock, but before she could slip the barrel in, another wave of that peculiar darkheadedness rolled through her mind. She swayed on her feet and found herself once again thinking of Karl Wallenda. Her hand began to shake again.
“Stop that!” she cried fiercely, and jammed the key desperately at the lock. “Stop th-”
The key missed the circle, struck the hard steel beside it instead, and turned in her blood-slicked fingers. She held onto it a second longer, and then it squirted out of her grasp-went greasy, one might have said-and fell to the floor. Now there was only the one key left,. and if she lost that-