Chapter 30
Children of Shadow
Egwene sat by the fire, staring up at the fragment of statue, but Perrin went down by the pool to be alone. Day was fading, and the night wind was already rising out of the east, ruffling the surface of the water. He took the axe from the loop on his belt and turned it over in his hands. The ashwood haft was as long as his arm, and smooth and cool to the touch. He hated it. He was ashamed of how proud he had been of the axe back in Emond's Field. Before he knew what he might be willing to do with it.
"You hate her that much?" Elyas said behind him.
Startled, he jumped and half raised the axe before he saw who it was. "Can... Can you read my mind, too? Like the wolves?"
Elyas cocked his head to one side and eyed him quizzically. "A blind man could read your face, boy. Well, speak up. Do you hate the girl? Despise her? That's it. You were ready to kill her because you despise her, always dragging her feet, holding you back with her womanish ways."
"Egwene never dragged her feet in her life," he protested. "She always does her share. I don't despise her, I love her." He glared at Elyas, daring him to laugh. "Not like that. I mean, she isn't like a sister, but she and Rand ... Blood and ashes! If the ravens caught us ... If ... I don't know. "
"Yes, you do. If she had to choose her way of dying, which do you think she'd pick? One clean blow of your axe, or the way the animals we saw today died? I know which I'd take."
"I don't have any right to choose for her. You won't tell her, will you? About..." His hands tightened on the axe haft; the muscles in his arms corded, heavy muscles for his age, built by long hours swinging the hammer at Master Luhhan's forge. For an instant he thought the thick wooden shaft would snap. "I hate this bloody thing," he growled. "I don't know what I'm doing with it, strutting around like some kind of fool. I couldn't have done it, you know. When it was all pretend and maybe, I could swagger, and play as if I ..." He sighed, his voice fading. "It's different, now. I don't ever want to use it again."
"You'll use it."
Perrin raised the axe to throw it in the pool, but Elyas caught his wrist.
"You'll use it, boy, and as long as you hate using it, you will use it more wisely than most men would. Wait. If ever you don't hate it any longer, then will be the time to throw it as far as you can and run the other way."
Perrin hefted the axe in his hands, still tempted to leave it in the pool. Easy for him to say wait. What if I wait and then can't throw it away?
He opened his mouth to ask Elyas, but no words came out. A sending from the wolves, so urgent that his eyes glazed over. For an instant he forgot what he had been going to say, forgot he had been going to say anything, forgot even how to speak, how to breathe. Elyas's face sagged, too, and his eyes seemed to peer inward and far away. Then it was gone, as quickly as it had come. It had only lasted a heartbeat, but that was enough.
Perrin shook himself and filled his lungs deeply. Elyas did not pause; as soon as the veil lifted from his eyes, he sped toward the fire without any hesitation. Perrin ran wordlessly behind him.
"Douse the fire!" Elyas called hoarsely to Egwene. He gestured urgently, and he seemed to be trying to shout in a whisper. "Get it out!"
She rose to her feet, staring at him uncertainly, then stepped closer to the fire, but slowly, clearly not understanding what was happening.
Elyas pushed roughly past her and snatched up the tea kettle, cursing when it burned him. Juggling the hot pot, he upended it over the fire just the same. A step behind him, Perrin arrived in time to start kicking dirt over the hissing coals as the last of the tea splashed into the fire, hissing and rising in tendrils of steam. He did not stop until the last vestige of the fire was buried.
Elyas tossed the kettle to Perrin, who immediately let it fall with a choked-off yell. Perrin blew on his hands, frowning at Elyas, but the fur-clad man was too busy giving their campsite a hasty look to pay any attention.
"No chance to hide that somebody's been here," Elyas said. "We'll just have to hurry and hope. Maybe they won't bother. Blood and ashes, but I was sure it was the ravens."
Hurriedly Perrin tossed the saddle on Bela, propping the axe against his thigh while he bent to tighten the girth.
"What is it?" Egwene asked. Her voice shook. "Trollocs? A Fade?"
"Go east or west," Elyas told Perrin. "Find a place to hide, and I'll join you as soon as I can. If they see a wolf ..." He darted away, crouching almost as if he intended to go to all fours, and vanished into the lengthening shadows of evening.
Egwene hastily gathered her few belongings, but she still demanded an explanation from Perrin. Her voice was insistent and growing more frightened by the minute as he kept silent. He was frightened, too, but fear made them move faster. He waited until they were headed toward the setting sun. Trotting ahead of Bela and holding the axe across his chest in both hands, he told what he knew over his shoulder in snatches while hunting for a place to go to ground and wait for Elyas.
"There are a lot of men coming, on horses. They came up behind the wolves, but the men didn't see them. They're heading toward the pool. Probably they don't have anything to do with us; it's the only water for miles. But Dapple says..." He glanced over his shoulder. The evening sun painted odd shadows on her face, shadows that hid her expression. What is she thinking? Is she looking at you as if she doesn't know you anymore? Does she know you? "Dapple says they smell wrong. It's ... sort of the way a rabid dog smells wrong." The pool was lost to sight behind them. He could still pick out boulders – fragments of Artur Hawkwing's statue – in the deepening twilight, but not to tell which was the stone where the fire had been. "We'll stay away from them, find a place to wait for Elyas."
"Why should they bother us?" she demanded. "We're supposed to be safe here. It's supposed to be safe. Light, there has to be some place safe."
Perrin began looking harder for somewhere to hide. They could not be very far from the pool, but the twilight was thickening. Soon it would be too dark to travel. Faint light still bathed the crests. From the hollows between, where there was barely enough to see, it seemed bright by contrast. Off to the left a dark shape stood sharp against the sky, a large, flat stone slanting out of a hillside, cloaking the slope beneath in darkness.
"This way," he said.
He trotted toward the hill, glancing over his shoulder for any sign of the men who were coming. There was nothing – yet. More than once he had to stop and wait while the others stumbled after him. Egwene was crouched over Bela's neck, and the mare was picking her way carefully over the uneven ground. Perrin thought they both must be more tired than he had believed. This had better be a good hiding place. I don't think we can hunt for another.
At the base of the hill he studied the massive, flat rock outlined against the sky, jutting out the slope almost at the crest. There was an odd familiarity to the way the top of the huge slab seemed to form irregular steps, three up and one down. He climbed the short distance and felt across the stone, walking along it. Despite the weathering of centuries he could still feel four joined columns. He glanced up at the step-like top of the stone, towering over his head like a huge lean-to. Fingers. We'll shelter in Artur Hawkwing's hand. Maybe some of his justice is left here.
He motioned for Egwene to join him. She did not move, so he slid back down to the base of the hill and told her what he had found.
Egwene peered up the hill with her head pushed forward. "How can you see anything?" she asked.