I pulled my arm away, ignored her sudden anger, and felt my own emotion rise. “When you got the call, you knew it was Grace? Didn’t you?”

She did not have to answer. It was obvious.

“You knew what that would mean to me and you lied about it. Worse, you tested me. You knew that I’d seen Grace and you tested me. What? Did Jamie tell you that I was there? That I saw her at the river?”

“I won’t apologize. You were the last to see her. I had to know if you’d tell me that.”

“Five years ago,” I spat out. “Did you believe me then?”

Her eyes drifted left. “I would not be with you if I thought you’d killed that boy.”

“So, where’s the trust now? Where’s the goddamn faith?”

She saw the rage in me, but didn’t flinch. “It’s what I do, Adam. It’s who I am.”

“Screw that, Robin.”

“Adam-”

“How could you even think it?”

I turned violently away; she raised a hand to stop me, but could not. I tore open the door and was through, into the thick night that held such perfect ruin.

CHAPTER 6

It was a short drive. I passed the Episcopal church and the old English cemetery. I took a left at the water tower, ignored the once grand homes that had decayed and been cut up into low-rent apartments; then I was into the medical district, among the doctor’s offices, pharmacies, and glass-front stores selling orthopedic shoes and walkers. I parked in the emergency room lot, and headed for the double doors. The entrance was lit, everything else dark. I saw a figure leaning against the wall, the glow of a cigarette. I looked once and glanced away. Jamie’s voice surprised me.

“Hey, bro.”

He took a last drag and flicked the butt into the parking lot. I met him near the door, under one of the many lights.

“Hey, Jamie. How is she?”

He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans and shrugged. “Who knows? They won’t let us see her yet. I think that she’s conscious and all, but she’s like, catatonic.”

“Is Dad here?”

“Yeah. And Dolf.”

“What about Miriam and your mom?”

“They’ve been in Charlotte. Flew in from Colorado last night and stayed to shop. They should be here before long. George went in to pick them up.”

“George?” I asked.

“George Tallman.”

“I don’t understand.”

Jamie waved a hand. “It’s a long story. Trust me.”

I nodded. “I’m going in. I need to talk to Dad. How’s Dolf holding up?”

“Everybody’s a mess.”

“You coming?”

His head moved. “I can’t handle it in there.”

“See you in a bit, then.” I turned for the door, and felt his hand on my shoulder.

“Adam, wait.” I turned back, and he looked miserable. “I’m not just out here to have a smoke.”

“I don’t understand.”

He looked up and then to the side, at everything but my face. “It’s not going to be pretty in there.”

“What do you mean?”

“Dolf found her, okay. She didn’t come home and he went looking for her. He found her where she’d been dragged off the trail. She was bloody, barely conscious. He carried her home, put her in the car, and drove her here.” He hesitated.

“And?”

“And she talked. She hasn’t said a word since she’s been here-at least not to us-but she talked to Dolf. He told the cops what she said.”

“Which was what?”

“She’s out of it, confused maybe, and she doesn’t remember much, but she told Dolf the last thing she does remember is that you kissed her, then she told you that she hates you, and then she ran away from you.”

His words crashed down on me.

“The cops say that she was attacked maybe a half mile from the dock.” I saw it all on his face. Half a mile. An easy run.

It was happening again.

“They think that I had something to do with it?”

Jamie looked like he’d rather be anywhere but here. He seemed to twist inside his own body. “It’s pretty bad, isn’t it, bro? Nobody has forgotten why you left.”

“I would never hurt Grace.”

“I’m just saying-”

“I know what you’re saying, damn it. What’s Dad saying?”

“Not a word, man. He’s gone into some kind of weird shutdown. I’ve never seen anything like it. And Dolf-Jesus-he looks like somebody hit him with a brick. I don’t know. It’s ugly.” He paused. We both knew where this would go. “I’ve been out here for an hour. I just thought you should know… before you walk in there.”

“Thanks, Jamie. I mean it. You didn’t have to.”

“We’re brothers, man.”

“Are the police still here?”

He shook his head. “They hung out for a long time, but it’s like I said, Grace isn’t really talking. I think they’re out at the farm, Robin and some guy named Grantham. He works for the sheriff. He’s the one asking all the questions.”

“The sheriff,” I said, feeling the emotion move into my face: the dislike, the memories. It was the Rowan County sheriff who’d filed the murder charge against me.

Jamie nodded. “Same one.”

“Wait a minute. Why is Robin involved in this? She works for the city.”

“I think she does all the sex cases. Some kind of partnership with the sheriff’s office when it’s out of her normal jurisdiction. She’s always in the paper. That Grantham, though, don’t let him fool you. He’s only been around for a few years, but he’s sharp.”

“Robin questioned me.” I still could not believe it.

“She had to, man. You know what it took for her to stand by you when everyone and his brother wanted you strung up. She almost got fired for it.” Jamie shoved his hands deeper into his pockets. “You need me to go in with you?”

“You offering?”

He didn’t answer, just looked embarrassed. “No problem,” I said, and turned away.

“Hey,” Jamie said. I stopped. “What I said before, about being glad to have a front-row seat… I didn’t mean it. Not like this.”

“It’s cool, Jamie. No sweat.”

I went in through the double doors. Lights hummed. People looked up and then ignored me. I rounded a corner and saw my father first. He sat like a broken man. His head hung loosely and his arms wrapped around his shoulders as if they had too many joints. Dolf sat beside him, very erect, and stared at the wall in utter stillness. The skin beneath his eyes had pulled away in pale, pink crescents, and he, too, looked reduced. He saw me first, and twitched as if caught doing something he should not.

I stepped farther into the waiting area they occupied. “Dolf.” I paused. “Dad.”

Dolf pushed himself to his feet and rubbed his hands on his thighs. My father looked up, and I saw that his face looked shattered, too. He held my eyes and straightened his back as if will alone could reconstitute a broken frame. I thought of what Robin had said, that my father wept when he heard that I’d come back. I saw nothing like that now. His fists were white and hard. Cords stretched the skin of his neck.

“What do you know about this, Adam?”

I’d hoped that this would not happen, that Jamie had been wrong. “What do you mean?”

“Don’t be smart with me, son. What do you know about this?” He raised his voice. “About Grace, goddamn it.”

For an instant I froze, but then I felt the palsy in my hands, the disbelief that made my skin burn. Dolf looked traumatized. My father stepped closer. He was taller than I, still wide through the shoulders. I searched his face for reason to hope and found nothing. So be it.

“I’m not going to have this discussion,” I said.

“Oh, yes, you damn well are. You’re going to talk to us, and you’re going to tell us what happened.”

“I have nothing to say to you about this.”

“You were with her. You kissed her. She ran from you. Don’t deny it. They found her clothes still on the dock.” He’d made up his mind. The calm was a veneer. It wouldn’t last. “The truth, Adam. For once. The truth.”

But I could tell him nothing; so I said the only thing that still mattered to me. Knowing my father and what would come, I said it.