“No, nothing,” Katherine said. “This isn’t a social visit.”

“Of course,” he replied, still smiling, but with just the right amount of sympathetic edge on it.

Katherine and I sat side by side. She pinched my leg to remind me to let her handle this, especially since Eddie had already used our past history to pound me into place.

She said, “So what is it you want, Major Golden?”

“I just thought we should get to know each other before the trial convenes,” he replied with a dimpled grin I would’ve dearly loved to wipe off his face.

“I already know about you. What is you want to know about me?”

“Oh, you don’t need to explain anything about yourself, Miss Carlson. Anybody who’s read a newspaper or magazine these past eight years knows about your brilliant legal exploits. I can’t say what a great pleasure it is to finally meet you. At the risk of sounding redundant, it will be the honor of my life to tilt with you in court.”

Had that come out of anybody else’s mouth, it would’ve been instantly recognizable as an obnoxiously oozy, completely insincere sentiment. Not from Eddie’s lips, though. He was the master. He could get standing ovations from juries. You had to look at his face, his physical bearing; you could swear he was being presented to the Queen of England.

I was praying Katherine wouldn’t succumb to this unctuous horseshit.

I stole a glance in her direction, and Jesus! She was beaming and blushing like a high school freshman being asked to the senior prom by the captain of the football team. She crossed and recrossed her legs once or twice. She twiddled her fingers.

“Thank you, Major Golden. I’m looking forward to it also.”

“Call me Eddie, please.”

“Of course, Eddie. And I’m Katherine.”

“Of course you are. Are you sure I can’t get you something to drink?” her new buddy Eddie asked again. I was getting sick.

“No, really. With this heat, I’ve been drinking all day,” Katherine said, giving him a blast of her most angelic smile.

If I didn’t mention it before, Katherine’s a beautiful woman, but in a way you’re almost afraid to touch, like a delicate porcelain doll. She’s not the type you dream of taking to a cheap motel for an afternoon of wild, raunchy sex; she’s the type you pray Mom sees you with.

Of course, she’s also a lesbian, so Eddie’s sexual charms and sterling good looks should’ve fallen on blind eyes. That’s not the way it was going down, though. She was melting in his hands.

“I’m terribly sorry about the case you’ve been handed,” Eddie said. “It’s really a raw deal.”

“Why’s that?” Katherine asked, smiling sweetly.

“Well, there isn’t a reasonable defense, is there? It wasn’t self-defense. He wasn’t framed. And the sexual perversions, Jesus! That isn’t going to sit well with a board of Army officers.”

“Some cases are more difficult than others.”

“I’ll say,” Eddie replied with an agreeable grin.

“Of course, there’s a great deal you probably haven’t discovered yet,” Katherine said, smiling coyly.

“Like what?”

“Come on, Eddie, a girl has to have a few secrets.”

He chuckled amiably. “Right, of course,” he said, as though this were complete baloney, but if Katherine wanted to fence, it was all good fun for him.

“So, Eddie, is there something specific you want to talk about?”

He took his eyes off her for the first time since we’d entered and toyed with something on his desk. He looked reluctant, like he really didn’t want to talk business, he just wanted to bask and reflect in Katherine’s glory. I mean, the guy was really, really good.

He finally said, “Actually, yes. I want to discuss the possibility of a deal.”

“A deal?” she asked, as though the very notion couldn’t have come as a greater surprise.

“I need to start by telling you,” Eddie swiftly said, lifting his arms helplessly, “my bosses are opposed to this. They want a full-blown trial. They want to use the trial to bolster Korean faith in the American legal system. They want Whitehall punished. Severely punished. They won’t be happy with anything less than a death sentence.”

Katherine swiftly bent forward and her eyes grew wide. “The death sentence? Oh my God.”

“That’s right. Only a trial’s a complete waste of time and needless trouble. You know that, right? And I know that, right? The outcome’s obvious, isn’t it? Besides, frankly, I’ve never been a fan of the death sentence. What does it accomplish? It doesn’t bring the victim back to life, does it? It doesn’t undo the crime, does it? So what’s the point?”

This was part of Eddie’s style. He liked to coax you into agreement by asking a thousand rhetorical questions that allowed you to think you were coming up with the answers. I thought it was a tacky stunt. It worked for him, though. I’ll say that.

And he was playing to Katherine’s obviously liberal tendencies, knowing damn well she must be opposed to the death sentence. He was trying to show they had common ground.

It was just a damned good thing he was having this conversation with her instead of with me, because I would’ve felt duty-bound to point out that Eddie’s Hangman Awards were owed substantially to the fact that he’d achieved something like four death sentences. He had more death sentences on his record than any other three Army lawyers combined.

But Katherine was nodding right along, completely mesmerized, under the thumb of the spellbinder.

“So what’s the deal?” she timidly asked.

Eddie leaned back in his chair and hooked both his thumbs under his belt. He sighed and appeared completely distressed by this whole thing, like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. It was an unbelievable performance. Truly remarkable. I have to admit that.

“Plead guilty to all counts. He’ll get life, no chance of parole.”

“All counts?” Katherine asked, in shock.

Eddie’s hands came out of his belt and he bent way forward, nearly all the way across his desk. His hands were palms up, beseeching the heavens, and his eyes were so sympathetic you could swear he was bleeding internally for her.

“Katherine, Katherine, I have to tell you, I’m going way out on a limb for this. I swear I am. He pleads to all counts or I can’t get a deal.”

Now he was wheedling and cajoling like a car salesman – like, Hey, I’d love to sell you this car; you only have to come up a little in price so I can persuade that tightfisted, asshole manager in the back room.

Katherine was seated pertly in her chair, her eyes riveted on his. “All counts?” she repeated, as though maybe she had a hearing problem.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I truly am. It’s all or nothing. But think about it. What’s the difference? He pleads to murder one, who gives a crap about the other stuff? You get a life sentence for murder, the rest is peachfuzz, right? Doesn’t really add a single year to his sentence, does it? It’s as generous as I can go. Think about it.”

Katherine’s expression turned pleading. “You’re sure, Eddie? All counts? You couldn’t drop something as insignificant as the engaging in homosexual acts? Not even for me?”

He somehow came even farther across the desk, literally out of his chair, until his absurdly handsome face was within inches of hers.

“I’m sorry, Katherine, this is the way it has to be,” he whispered.

“Fuck you!” she roared so loud even I bounced in my chair.

Eddie reeled backward. “Huh?”

“Fuck you, Golden! You want me to spell it for you? I’m going to take this case and break it off in your ass so deep it’ll scar your tonsils. You arrogant jerk-off. You’ve got no idea what nasty little surprises Drummond and I have in store for you. Just wait, you puffed-up asshole.”

Poor Eddie was in complete shock. Like General Spears, he’d just gotten his first unexpected dose of what I’d had dished at me for years. I almost felt sorry for him. She’d been so girlish, so pliant in Eddie’s skilled hands. She’d walked him down the primrose path. One moment the poor putz was sauntering joyfully in the middle of a flat, open, warm meadow, and all of sudden, out of the blue, Whoosh! – an avalanche of snow and ice crashed down on his head.