"You'll have to go through decontamination procedure A," the senior Meknosian medical officer said. "So that no spore or virus from -"
"I realize that," Bedford said. "Let's get it done."
Later, when decontamination had been completed and he was back in his ship starting up the drive, his radio came on. It was one or another of the Meknosians; to Bedford they all looked alike. "What was the cat's name?" the Meknosian asked.
"Norman," Bedford said, and jabbed the ignite switch. His ship shot upward and he smiled.
He did not smile, however, when he found the power supply to his theta chamber missing. Nor did he smile when the backup unit could also not be located. Did I forget to bring it? he asked himself. No, he decided; I wouldn't do that. They took it.
Two years before he reached Terra. Two years of full consciousness on his part, deprived of theta sleep; two years of sitting or floating or – as he had seen in military-preparedness training holofilms – curled up in a corner, totally psychotic.
He punched out a radio request to return to Meknos III. No response. Well, so much for that.
Seated at his control module, he snapped on the little inboard computer and said, "My theta chamber won't function; it's been sabotaged. What do you suggest I do for two years?"
THERE ARE EMERGENCY ENTERTAINING TAPES
"Right," he said. He would have remembered. "Thank you." Pressing the proper button, he caused the door of the tape compartment to slide open.
No tapes. Only a cat toy – a miniature punching bag – that had been included for Norman; he had never gotten around to giving it to him. Otherwise… bare shelves.
The alien mind, Bedford thought. Mysterious and cruel.
Setting the ship's audio recorder going, he said calmly and with as much conviction as possible, "What I will do is build my next two years around the daily routine. First, there are meals. I will spend as much time as possible planning, fixing, eating, and enjoying delicious repasts. During the time ahead of me, I will try out every combination of victuals possible." Unsteadily, he rose and made his way to the massive food storage locker.
As he stood gazing into the tightly packed locker – tightly packed with row upon row of identical snacks – he thought, On the other hand, there's not much you can do with a two-year supply of cat kibble. In the way of variety. Are they all the same flavor?
They were all the same flavor.
Notes
All notes in italics are by Philip K. Dick. The year when the note was written appears in parentheses following the note. Most of these notes were written as story notes for the collections THE BEST OF PHILIP K. DICK (published 1977) and THE GOLDEN MAN (published 1980). A few were written at the request of editors publishing or reprinting a PKD story in a book or magazine.
When there is a date following the name of a story, it is the date the manuscript of that story was first received by Dick's agent, per the records of the Scott Meredith Literary Agency. Absence of a date means no record is available. The name of a magazine followed by a month and year indicates the first published appearance of a story. An alternate name following a story indicates Dick's original name for the story, as shown in the agency records.
These five volumes include all of Philip K. Dick's short fiction, with the exception of short novels later published as or included in novels, childhood writings, and unpublished writings for which manuscripts have not been found. The stories are arranged as closely as possible in chronological order of composition; research for this chronology was done by Gregg Rickman and Paul Williams.
THE LITTLE BLACK BOX ("From Ordinary Household Objects") 5/6/63. Worlds of Tomorrow, Aug 1964.
I made use of this story when I wrote my novel DO ANDROIDS DREAM OF ELECTRIC SHEEP? Actually, the idea is better put forth in the story. Here, a religion is regarded as a menace to all political systems; therefore it, too, is a kind of political system, perhaps even an ultimate one. The concept of caritas (or agape) shows up in my writing as the key to the authentic human. The android, which is the unauthentic human, the mere reflex machine, is unable to experience empathy. In this story it is never clear whether Mercer is an invader from some other world. But he must be; in a sense all religious leaders are… but not from another planet as such. (1978)
THE WAR WITH THE FNOOLS Galactic Outpost, Spring 1964.
Well, once again we are invaded. And, humiliatingly, by a life form which is absurd. My colleague Tim Powers once said that Martians could invade us simply by putting on funny hats, and we'd never notice. It's a sort of low-budget invasion. I guess we're at the point where we can be amused by the idea of Earth being invaded. (And this is when they really zap you.) (1978)
A GAME OF UNCHANCE 11/9/63. Amazing, July 1964.
A carnival is feral; another carnival shows up and is pitted against the first one; and the antithetical interaction is preplanned in such a way that the first carnival wins. It's as if the two opposing forces that underlie all change in the universe are rigged; in favor of thanatos, the dark force, yin or strife, which is to say, the force of destruction. (1978)
PRECIOUS ARTIFACT 12/9/63. Galaxy, Oct 1964.
This story utilized a peculiar logic which I generally employ, which Professor Patricia Warrick pointed out to me. First you have Y. Then you do a cybernetics flipflop and you have null-Y. Okay, now you reverse it again and have null-null-Y. Okay, the question is: Does null-null Y equal Y3? Or is it a deepening of null-Y? In this story, what appears to be the case is Y but we find out the opposite is true (null-Y). But then that turns out not to be true, so are we back to Y? Professor Warrick says that my logic winds up with Y equals null-Y. I don't agree, but I'm not sure what I do wind up with. Whatever it is, in terms of logic, it is contained in this particular story. Either I've invented a whole new logic or, ahem, I'm not playing with a full deck. (1978)
RETREAT SYNDROME 12/23/63. Worlds of Tomorrow, Jan 1965.
A TERRAN ODYSSEY 3/17/64 [previously unpublished; put together by PKD from sections of DR. BLOODMONEY].
YOUR APPOINTMENT WILL BE YESTERDAY 8/27/65. Amazing, Aug 1966. [Included in adapted form in PKD's novel COUNTER-CLOCK WORLD.]
HOLY QUARREL 9/13/65. Worlds of Tomorrow, May 1966.
NOT BY ITS COVER 9/21/65. Famous Science Fiction, Summer 1968.
Here I presented what used to be a wish on my part: that the Bible was true. Obviously, I was at a sort of halfway point between doubt and faith. Years later I'm still in that position; I'd like the Bible to be true, but -- well, maybe if it isn't we can make it so. But, alas, it's going to take plenty of work to do it. (1978)
RETURN MATCH 10/14/65. Galaxy, Feb 1967.
The theme of dangerous toys runs like a tattered thread throughout my writing. The dangerous disguised as the innocent… and what could be more innocent than a toy? This story makes me think of a set of huge speakers I looked at last week; they cost six thousanddollars and were larger than refrigerators. Our joke about them was that if you didn't go to the audio store to see them, they'd come to see you. (1978)
FAITH OF OUR FATHERS 1/17/66. Dangerous Visions, edited by Harlan Ellison, Garden City, 1967. [Hugo Award nominee]
The title is that of an old hymn. I think, with this story, I managed to offend everybody, which seemed at the time to be a good idea, but which I've regretted since. Communism, drugs, sex, God -- I put it all together, and it's been my impression since that when the roof fell in on me years later, this story was in some eerie way involved. (1976)