“Great!”

Jude pictured him pumping his fist. “Sounds good. I am a little thirsty.”

Jude brought his cane even though Lily helped to steer him from their suite and through the resort the short distance to the outdoor bar. Here, he discovered, the drinks were served in plastic cups so the patrons could conveniently carry them all over the resort.

They sidled up to the counter and a bartender spoke from directly in front of Jude.

“What’s your poison today, guys?”

Liam didn’t hesitate. “I’ll have a Sex on the Beach.”

“You are so cliché,” Lily said, giggling.

“Am not! They’re good-you should try one.”

“We just got here, cutie. I want to be conscious when the sun sets.” Ignoring Liam’s snort, she addressed the bartender. “I’ll have a Corona with a lime.”

“A rum and Coke for me,” Jude said.

“Coming right up.”

The man moved away to his task, while Liam continued to ogle their surroundings.

“Oh, man. This place is awesome. Thanks for bringing us here, Lily.”

“You’re very welcome. What would you like to-”

“Holy crap! Topless volleyball,” he breathed in reverence. “Can we go down there?”

“We are, in a minute. Hope they’re wearing sunscreen,” Lily joked.

“You want to play?”

“I’ll pass, thanks. Jumping around with my parts jiggling isn’t my thing.”

“But you don’t have anything to jiggle,” Liam said, laughing.

“You little shit,” she replied with fake menace. “Just see if that gets you any nooky.”

“Oh, there’s plenty of that around here if you cut me off.”

“Careful, you have to live with me.”

“Sorry.” He didn’t sound sincere.

Their drinks arrived and Lily pushed Jude’s into his hand. “Here you go.”

“Thanks.” He took a swallow, relishing the cold burst of the dark flavor on his tongue. “This is good.”

“Mine, too,” Liam said. “Well, I’m going to watch the volleyball game. Come on, you two!”

Jude heard the barstool scrape and figured he must’ve taken off. Lily laughed, leaning into Jude’s side.

“Good grief. Don’t you ever let him out of the kitchen?”

Jude thought about that. “Not enough, apparently, considering he’s been sneaking around with Dev and Geneva. In fact, I’m not sure he’s ever been on a real vacation.”

“That’s just criminal. If it was up to me, I’d spoil him all the time. I’d spoil both of you.”

Did he detect a hint of wistfulness?

“You two have bonded quite well.”

“And have we? Bonded?”

He reached for her. “Do you really need to ask?”

“Yes,” she said, taking his hand. “I feel… like there’s more going on between you and me than great sex-not that there’s anything wrong with consenting adults playing fair and square. But I…”

“Tell me.” His heart quickened. He very much wanted to hear what she had to say on the subject.

Just then, a man next to them ordered a drink.

“Walk with me,” she suggested.

He let her pull him away from the bar, getting that she wanted a little more privacy. He toyed with his rum and Coke, happy and a little nervous, too.

“This is new territory for me,” she went on. “In my limited experience, it’s not wise to get too attached to someone you care about. To let those feelings grow into more.”

“You’ve been hurt,” he said, squeezing her hand.

“Not in the way you mean.”

He took a guess. “You’re talking about your father again.”

“Yeah. It’s not that I consciously shut out people on purpose. Or at least I don’t think so.” She sighed. “I’m not doing a very good job of explaining myself.”

“You’re doing fine. I think I know what you’re trying to say.” She gave a rueful laugh. “Well, you’re a step ahead of me.”

“Let me give it a shot-you came to work for me, a man who shares your sexual preferences, and you thought you’d won the lottery. But you didn’t expect our fun to develop into real feelings. And that scares the shit out of you.”

“You’re a mind reader.”

“No, I just feel the same way.”

“You-you have feelings for me? Real ones?” She sounded vulnerable, unsure.

“How could I not? You’re smart, beautiful. You blow my mind in bed. But more than that, you’ve been a rock for me. In the short time we’ve known each other, you’ve gotten under my skin like no one else has.” Pausing, he pulled her to face him before going on.

“Do you remember the first time we made love?”

“Yes. How could I forget?”

“You’ll never know how much that meant to me. I want to spoil you, make you happy. Learn all the things that make you laugh. Or make you sad. I’m falling for you, Lily, and I want to let this grow,” he said softly, skimming up her arm.

“Oh, Jude.” Her voice shook with emotion. “I want that, too.”

“But there’s something you need to know up front.” He took a deep breath. “About my nightmares. More and more, I’m convinced they’re memories and if they are… I might be… an evil man. Or at least might have done horrible things. You can walk away now and never have to find out.”

“No. You’re not evil,” she said, brooking no argument. “I’m absolutely positive you’re one of the finest men I know. Period.”

“You can’t know-”

“I do.” She sounded a bit on edge now.

“How?”

“Tell me something.” She paused. “How do you feel in these dreams, when you’re committing these supposedly evil acts?”

“Mostly? Cold. Locked down inside.”

“Justified?”

“I… yes,” he said slowly. “I think so.”

“Anything else?”

“No-wait, yes. Tired. Ready to throw in the towel.” How strange.

“As though the time has come to quit,” she said, sounding certain. “You’re burned-out.”

A chill crept down his spine. “How do you know this?”

“Have you considered that you may have had a second job? Something covert? In that case, you aren’t a monster at all, but a victim of something bigger than yourself.”

“That’s pretty far-fetched.” But even as he protested, he wasn’t so sure.

“Just think about it, all right? And focus on recalling what details you can.”

“I-sure. I can do that.”

“Good, handsome. Kiss me.”

“Gladly.”

Why did it seem like she wanted to distract him? Of course, there were worse ways to end the disturbing conversation. Cupping her head, he claimed her mouth, lips moving against hers, gentle. Then he delved deeper, sliding his tongue inside to taste the beer and lime, salty sweet, and more intoxicating than all the liquor in Los Cabos.

When they parted, she took his arm. “Come on, let’s catch up with Liam. I want to watch him go nuts over topless volleyball.”

He accepted the change of subject without comment, for now. Such a serious issue couldn’t be avoided forever.

“People leaping around half-naked? Christ, what a sport. This part of being blind sucks, big-time,” he complained.

“I’ll give you a play-by-play.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“And a live reenactment, later.”

“Now you’re talking!”

As she led him toward the mad revelry, Jude thought maybe he could luck out. Have everything a man could want or need.

Love. Companionship. Contentment.

Awesome sex.

If only Lily was right, and he wasn’t the monster he feared.

Lily had to tell him the truth. Despite Michael urging her to take it slow with him.

Not once had she considered it a real option before now. She’d been too focused on the case itself, not the man. Once the mind sweep failed, and it would very soon, he’d remember his job at SHADO. He’d recognize her name as that of a fellow spy.

And he’d know that, best- case scenario, she’d come here to deceive him. At worst, he might believe she was the one behind the sweep. That she was involved in Dietz’s schemes.

Eventually, he’d realize she was sent to kill him.

He’d never forgive her, and the knowledge slammed her hard. Made her want to spill the whole story and throw herself on his mercy. But she’d lose him anyway.