Upon my word, the old man too was avoiding my eyes!

“London has tired her,” he said vaguely. “She must pick up again. That takes time.”

“Nothing pathological?” I asked, worried.

“No, no. Just an upset of the neuro-vegetative system. Quiet life and country air will put it right in time. And your little vixen?” he inquired without transition, as if he was in a hurry to change the subject. “Anything new?”

“Pah!” I said. “Pretty little. She is marking time. Just two or three new words caught here and there. But hardly anything as far as essentials go.”

“What do you call essentials?”

“Well, I mean, for instance, that the only way to oblige her to resist her instinctive urges and behave in a bearable manner is still punishment. Nothing else. The fear of being punished stands her in stead of reason or, if you like, of second nature.”

“Well,” the doctor said, laughing, “isn’t that actually the beginning of ethics?”

“Yes, the ethics of an animal trainer,” I said ironically. “You see, this tends to confirm in me some age-old certainties. I’ve always thought that prison, capital punishment as a deterrent, are just survivals of the Stone Age; they solve nothing, prevent nothing. There are no fewer thefts or murders in our era than there were at the time of the Visigoths or the Vandals. The human conscience must have sprung from altogether different sources. But which ones? You can’t imagine the number of books poor Nanny has been poring over these last weeks: on primitive psychology, the metaphysics of manners or the immediate data of consciousness… without finding anything remotely applicable to the case of a fox-woman.”

“The mind of man,” said the doctor, “is born with the individual. That’s the clue to everything. When he discovered that he existed, separately from the rest of things, and from the rest of his pack. Obviously, the pack served him as a mirror for this discovery, but at the same time it retarded it. We are now faced with the same dialectic. Your vixen must learn in the first place that she exists. Nanny and you are helping her and retarding her at the same time. That’s why I thought of those mirrors. Nothing new in that respect?”

He had not mentioned them for a long time.

“No. Actually, I’ve even removed the cheval glass from her room and put it up in mine, where it is more useful.”

“Quite, quite,” he said, suddenly abstracted. “Did it really strike you so much that she wasn’t looking well?”

It took me quite two seconds to realize that he was talking of Dorothy again.

“Well, she seems to have lost weight,” I said, “and her complexion isn’t as clear as it was. Are you more worried about her health than you care to admit?”

“If it only were her health!” he muttered.

“You’re hiding the truth from me, Doctor… Am I to blame for something?” I asked courageously.

“You, my poor boy?” he exclaimed, and I never knew whether or not he had been on the verge of telling me more, for Dorothy appeared with a well-laden tray. Nanny had gone to fetch Sylva from her room.

As usual, Sylva flung herself on me with puppylike manifestations, snapping at my ear, licking the hand with which I was trying to protect myself. Whenever she had been kept locked up by herself for too long she would fall back into these old habits and recover her manners only after the first joy of reunion had been calmed. I pushed her back as best I could, and now it was the doctor’s turn. She had grown accustomed to the black frock coat and for a long time now had been great friends with the old man. Good-naturedly he let himself be kissed and snapped at, then gently pushed her away too.

“What about me?” asked Dorothy.

Sylva went up to her, with less enthusiasm but still with some eagerness. As they were about to kiss, Sylva suddenly gave a start, or rather a shudder. She jumped back, slipped out of Dorothy’s already outstretched hands and took shelter behind Mrs. Bumley’s armchair. From there she gazed at the young woman, her cat’s eyes aglow with a watchful attention. Something had alarmed her—but what?

Dorothy had remained with her hands in mid-air. She slowly lowered them under our surprised stare. She herself seemed not so much surprised as the prey of a strange ccmmotion. Her features seemed to decompose. She almost frightened me for a few seconds. And I realized that what had stirred her father when he had talked of her a moment ago was also some sort of fear. “A dead crab”—it was as if someone had just whispered those words into my ear. I perceived that I did not know her, that she was a mystery to me. That, actually, I did not know anything of her life, nor of the reasons for her return.

All these thoughts occurred to me in less than an instant. The moment after, Dorothy was smiling again, her face had resumed its calm, slightly banal beauty under the coiled plaits of her blond hair. I could believe that it had all been just a dream.

“Well,” she said quietly, “so you don’t love me any more?”

And with an amused expression, she held out to Sylva a slice of toast spread with liver paste, for she knew that Sylva still had not the least liking for sweets.

Sylva took the toast, Nanny poured the tea, and there was no further incident.

Chapter 20

IT was toward the middle of the following week, a little before midnight, that the event occurred.

I cannot recollect the scene without being gripped once again by emotion. Did I realize at the time that it was really my vixen’s first big step in the direction of a human consciousness—the first step out of the dark ramparts in which the animal is imprisoned? Judging by the excitement which overcame me, I think I can claim I did, even though I was not as categorically certain as Doctor Sullivan when I told him about it.

Yet nothing had happened in the way he had foreseen. He had hoped, it will be remembered, that Sylva might eventually recognize herself in the cheval glass by constantly seeing herself in it but that, after weeks during which her indifference for this object and her inattention bordered on purblindness, I had decided to move the glass into my bedroom. There, at least, somebody wrould be making use of it. Most of all, this permanent failure was getting on my nerves. I did not, therefore, expect any more from this direction. And if the very first stage in the awakening of my vixen must be, as Dr. Sullivan said, the discovery of her own existence, I had given up hope that a looking glass might be instrumental to it.

Nor was I altogether wrong. For Sylva awoke to this revelation not by recognizing herself at last but because, on the contrary, she suddenly no longer found her image in it. Nanny’s persistence had been greater than mine, and despite the recurrent failure she would make her pupil sit down, every day, morning and evening, in front of her own reflection. This made me think of Trotty, my parents’ fox terrier. When I was a child, I used to hold him up to the wardrobe mirror so that he should see himself; and he too, after sniffing it, would become annoyed and wriggle in my arms until I let him go. Sylva, as the little fox she was, acted just like him: she would tear herself impatiently out of Nanny’s arms, and curl up on the floor by the bed, yawn, close her eyes and fall asleep. It seemed, oddly enough, that far from increasing her familiarity with mirrors, these daily attempts increasingly irritated her.

“Leave her alone,” I would say to Nanny, myself exasperated by my discouragement. But Nanny was as obdurate as her pupil.

Then one evening, as I was sitting before the dressing-table in my room, filing my fingernails before going to bed, I saw Sylva come in, probably to kiss me good night after her fashion, as she did every night. I perceived her in the mirror, for my easy chair had its back to the door. Its back was tall and stood between Sylva and me so that she too could see only my reflection in the glass. The result was that she walked toward me, not where I really was, out of her sight, but where she saw me—the cheval glass. Thus she had first to pass close to my chair.