I felt like once, in school, we had done dust. We weren't afraid of the side effects. We could handle them. I had sniffed it. And the walls of the room had begun to bulge and wobble and vibrate. Reality threatened to shred all around me. I had started to scream in terror. Because I knew that I was all that was holding the universe together. And if I let go, the universe would let go-when was that?
Just before the plagues, wasn't it? I'd let go and the world had come to an end. It was my fault.
Where was I anyway?
My life was blurring. I didn't remember who I was or what year it was? Had we conquered the Earth yet? Oh, yes, we already had. We just hadn't found out yet.
What did that mean? What did anything mean? I blinked awake. Where was I?
I didn't recognize the area. l turned around slowly.
The van was on a distant hill. Somehow I had walked down the slope and away from it. I was a good half-mile away. The green had faded away; the other colors ruled here.
They smelled so . . . interesting.
I got down on my hands and knees to look.
There was still grass here. Underneath the other things. I guess they were plants, maybe they weren't. They looked like silvery little threads crawling up each blade of grass. Where they touched them they leached the color out of the grass stems, leaving the grass a peculiar bleached white color and brittle to the touch. The grass crunched like old leaves.
The threads were almost shiny. The thinner threads were white. As they grew older?-yes, older-and thicker, they turned pinkish. Where they had established themselves completely, the ground looked like a pastel tangle. The pink stuff fed on the green. And the blue stuff fed on the pink.
Naturally.
Where the pink threads were smooth and clean like noodles, the blue threads were scraggly and barbed. They looked like little insect legs encircling and leaching the flesh of the pink spaghetti. I wondered how many levels of evolution I was looking at.
A parasite that fed on grass. Plant or animal? Or something that was a little of each, but not enough of either to be one or the other. And then another parasite that fed on that one. Was there still another and another beyond that? When would we see those life forms? Just how vicious was the Chtorran ecology anyway.
Wait around. You'll find out.
Shut up, little voice. Get out of my head. Am I going mad again? No, I'm still mad. Is that me or the plants?
Stop and look. No, that's just me. I recognize my own craziness. How long have I been crazy, anyway?
All my life.
The pink stuff had roots. It could survive by itself. But it ate the green out of the grass when it was there. Smart. If it had to earn its own way it did. But it preferred to freeload.
What about the blue?
I pressed the ground with my fingers. It felt spongy. My head felt suddenly cavernous. I was hearing echoes of my own thoughts again.
I straightened up, blinking.
What had happened? I'd gotten out of the van. . . .
I'd been hallucinating. Or something. I was tired and-I'd fallen down on the grass. There was something in the grass. Yes, the pink and blue.
I recognized the pink. I knew the blue. I'd seen them before. Jason had showed them to me.
I knew what they were.
Candyland.
All the prettiest colors of sugary pink and spicy lavender bobbed in the summer sun. The air was thick with their sweet, sharp scent. There were tufts of cloud-white blue and marshmallow white, there were stalks of candy-cane red, there were tuffets of frosting and puddles of pudding--everything stretched and rolled out to the horizon, which was lost in the dust of yellow infinity.
The air was so sweet, it was like standing on top of a giant angel cake. I imagined I was-and that the stalks were candles and that all the sparkling colors were the candy sprinkles on top of a three-meter layer of caramel frosting. And underneath that-you could dig through the richest, thickest, sweetest layers of pure white cake until you hit the deepest layers of rich chocolate fudge . . .
But you had to be naked.
You had to take off all of your clothes and roll around in the candy and get good and sugary, and then when you had grown a big corkscrew snout, then you could start digging.
I laughed as I kicked off my shoes, and giggled as I pulled off my shirt and peeled out of my underwear. This was going to be fun.
Yes, I knew the pink and blue. Jason had showed them to me, just before the Revelation. And now, here I'd found a whole field of Revelation plants, all to myself. I wasn't just going to meet god here. I was going to be god.
The sun was a big red rose in a fat yellow sky. All the plants were singing on the tufty fields. I laughed and burbled. I skipped and sang across the field.
Until I stopped.
I stopped to stare at the giant pink gumdrop.
It was too big to eat. I'd have to live in it instead. I didn't think the worms would mind.
Their candy cane was out front, all sugar and melty. It said, Vacancy. Inquire within.
53
Encounter
"How did the Wicked Witch of the West take a bath?"
-SOLOMON SHORT
The gumdrop was a very pretty gumdrop. The door was open, so I went in.
I knew which room would be mine. I hoped I wasn't too late for dinner. The worms would be annoyed. I started down the tapioca tunnels.
The walls were covered with the finest blue fur I'd ever seen. It grew down in long, velvety strands. You could brush your hands through it as you spiraled downward. It tingled and twinkled and rang like little bells. When you touched it, it sparkled with bursts of pixie dust. Why hadn't I ever noticed that before? If you didn't touch it, it just glowed happily to itself.
There were big buttery nodules here too, all over the walls. They were thick and chewy looking, but I wasn't hungry yet. Two fat red-bellied millipedes slithered up the tunnel past me, chittering about their bellies; I said hello, but they were too busy to answer. They had to grow up big and fat first.
I was pleased to see that the circulation vines were spreading throughout the gumdrop. They were thick with moist red syrup. So sweet-smelling too. This was going to be one of the great gumdrops of the world.
Everything was here.
I hoped the worms would like me and would let me stay. I could tell them gumdrop stories.
The worms were in the big chamber of the left ventricle. I knew, because that's where all the circulation vines were pointing.
For now, anyway. Later, they would point toward the real main chamber. That would be much deeper. And much larger.
There were four worms here in the gumdrop. They were very beautiful worms. All of them were well striped. Their markings were very clear and clean. I was glad of that. I liked the certainty. Their sides were bright with fierce orange and gentle pink and then a bit of brooding dark purple.
I knew their names, even though I couldn't pronounce them, so I said hi the best way I could and just waited politely for them to notice me. They were communing. The big one was (Aristotle). He was the big one even though he wasn't the biggest. The worms always have a big one who does most of the knowing for the others, and being the big one isn't about size, it's about knowing. (Aristotle) had the most purple on his sides.
(Beelzebub) was only recently male and was still trumpeting and posturing; his orange stripes blazed. The others all thought he was very beautiful. (Aristotle) was very eager to mate with him. So was (Gargoyle); she kept flashing pink with her orange.