Изменить стиль страницы

'I've never let him go before-not even for just two days-without saying just a little about his condition,' Dr. Larch told Candy and Wally. A wonderful word: condition. The effect of the word in a doctor's mouth is truly astonishing. Candy seemed to forget she'd just had an abortion; the color came back to Wally's face. 'It's his heart,' said Wilbur Larch. 'I've not told him about it because I haven't wanted to worry him. It's the sort of condition that could be made worse by his worrying about it,' Dr. Larch confided to these two good-hearted innocents, who gave him their rapt attention.

'Just so he's not exposed to anything too strenuous, or to anything too violent in the way of exercise-or to anything too shocking,' said Wilbur Larch, who had created a perfect history for someone who simply needed to be careful-who needed to stay out of danger. Larch had given his favorite orphan a history that he hoped would keep him safe. He was aware that it was a history a father would construct for his son-if a father could make his son believe it.

Homer Wells, at the moment, couldn't construct a history or anything else that would be soothing to Curly Day, who buried himself under several pillows and a blanket and sobbed.

'What do you need to be adopted for?' Curly cried. 'You're practically a doctor!

'It's just for two days,' Homer Wells repeated; with each repetition his promise sounded less and less likely.

'They're taking you!' I can't believe it!' cried Curly Day.

Nurse Angela came and sat beside Homer on Curly's {263} bed. Together they regarded the sobbing mound under the blanket.

'It's just for two days, Curly,' Nurse Angela said lamely.

'Doctor Larch said Homer was here to protect us!' Curly cried. 'Some protection!'

Nurse Angela whispered to Homer: that if he'd go clean up the operating table, she'd sit with Curly until he felt better; she'd not wanted to clean up the table while the nice young couple needed to be alone. 'Your friends seemed to be having a nice moment together,' Nurse Angela whispered to Homer Wells. My friends! he thought. Is it possible. I'm going to be having friends?

'You're not the best one, Homer!' Curly cried, under the blanket.

'Right,' Homer said; he tried to pat Curly, but Curly stiffened and held his breath. 'I'll see you, Curly,' Homer said.

'Traitor!' cried Curly Day. Curly seemed to recognize Nurse Angela's touch; his rigid body relaxed, and he gave himself over to a steady sobbing.

Nurse Edna had finally stopped young Steerforth from crying, or she had simply outlasted the baby, who was now washed and dressed and almost asleep in Nurse Edna's arms. He had taken enough of the formula to satisfy Nurse Edna, and so she put him in his bed and finished cleaning the room where he'd been delivered. As soon as she'd put a fresh sheet on the table-she was just wiping the gleaming stirrups-Dr. Larch lurched into the room with the stationmaster's stiff body a somewhat pliable plank over his shoulder.

'Wilbur!' Nurse Edna said critically. 'You should let Homer help you with that.'

'It's time to get used to not having Homer around,' Dr. Larch said curtly, dropping the stationmaster's body on the table. Oh, dear, Nurse Edna thought, we're in for a ferocious time of it.

'I don't suppose you've seen the sternum shears,' Dr. Larch asked her. {264}

'The snips?' she asked.

'They're call shears,' he said. 'If you'd just undress him-I'll ask Homer.'

Homer knocked before he entered the operating room, where Candy had dressed herself, with Wally's fumbling help, and now stood leaning against him in what struck Homer as an oddly formal pose-as if the couple had just finished a dance competition and were awaiting the judges' applause.

'You can relax now,' said Homer Wells, not quite able to look at Candy's face. 'Maybe you'd like some fresh air. I won't be long; I have to clean the table.' As an awkward second thought, he added to Candy, 'You're feeling all right, aren't you?'

'Oh, yes,' she said, her eyes passing over Homer very quickly; she smiled reassuringly at Wally.

That was when Dr. Larch came in and asked Homer if he knew where the sternum shears were.

'They're with Clara,' Homer admitted. 'I'm sorry,' he added quickly. 'I had them there because I thought I might need them for the autopsy. On the fetus,' he added.

'You don't use sternum shears on a fetus,' Dr. Larch said.

'I know-I used the scissors,' said Homer Wells, who was aware that the words 'fetus' and 'autopsy' fell like drops of blood on Wally and Candy. 'I'll go get the shears for you,' Homer said to Dr. Larch.

'No, finish what you're doing here,' Larch said. 'You two should get some fresh air,' he said to Wally and Candy, who took his suggestion for a command-which it was. They left the operating room; on their way down the hall to the hospital entrance, they would have spotted the stationmaster's assistant, lurking in his corner, had the assistant not been so unnerved by the sight of Dr. Larch carrying the stationmaster's body out of the dispensary that he had cautiously attempted to follow this troubling vision. In his fear, he made a wrong turn and {265} found himself in the dispensary. He was staring at the mud on the sheet at the foot of the bed when Wally led Candy outdoors.

'If you're so sure it was his heart,' Homer Wells was asking Dr. Larch, 'why are you in such a hurry to do the autopsy?'

'I like to keep busy,' Larch said, surprised by the barely restrained anger in his own voice. He might have told Homer, then, that he loved him very much and that he needed something very active to occupy himself at this moment of Homer's departure. He might have confessed to Honner Wells that he wanted very much to lie down on his own bed in the dispensary and administer a little ether to himself, but that he couldn't very well ha.ve done that while the stationmaster had occupied his bed. He wanted to take Homer Wells in his arms, and hug him, and kiss him, but he could only hope that Homeir understood how much Dr. Larch's self-esteem was dependent on his self-control. And so he said nothing; he left Homer alone in the operating room while he went to find the sternum shears.

Homer scrubbed the table with disinfectant. He had sealed the refuse bag when he noticed the almost transparent blondness of the clump of pubic hair that clung to his pantleg-a tight, clean curl of Candy's especially fine hair was caught on his knee. He held it up to the light, then put it in his pocket.

Nurse Edna was crying as she undressed the stationmaster. Dr. Larch had told her and Nurse Angela that there would be no hoopla of heartfelt well-wishing upon the departure of Homer Wells-nothing that would lead Candy and Wally to suspect that Homer Wells was even considering he might be gone more than two days. 'Nothing,' Dr. Larch had said. No hugs, no kisses, thought Nurse Edna, weeping. Her tears had no influence on the expression of the stationmaster, whose face remained seized by fear; Nurse Edna completely ignored the stationmaster. She devoted herself to her misery at {266} being forbidden to gush over saying good-bye to Homer Wells.

'We will all appear casual about his leaving,' Dr. Larch had said. 'Period.'

Casual! Nurse Edna thought. The stationmaster was down to his socks when Dr. Larch walked in with the sternum shears.

'There will be no crying,' he said sternly to her. 'Do you want to give everything away?' She yanked off the stationmaster's socks and threw them at Dr. Larch; then she left him alone with the body.

Homer Wells gave the operating table a thorough inspection, a final examination-a last look. He transferred the cluster of Candy's pubic hair from his pocket to his wallet; he once more counted the money Dr. Larch had given him. There was almost fifty dollars. He went back to the boys' sleeping room; Nurse Angela still sat on the edge of the bed where Curly Day was still sobbing. She kissed Homer without altering the motion of her hand, which was rubbing Curly Day's back through the blanket; Homer kissed her, and left her without a word.