"Better zan you!"
I shook my head, but stopped because it made it ache worse. "Since when is my life worth more than yours?"
"Since you became Pythia!"
From halfway across the lot, Mircea's head whipped around. I repressed a sigh. Damn vampire hearing.
"Yeah. That's kind of the point," I said, grabbing her hand. Françoise looked confused, but I didn't stop to explain that the Pythia is supposed to be the one protecting other people, not needing it herself. Mircea was striding toward us, looking determined, and I was not up to a verbal fencing match with him tonight. Hell, I lost those even when my brain didn't feel like it was about to throb out of my skull. "Hold on," I said, really hoping I could manage one more shift before I passed out.
Chapter 13
Sight down the barrel of the gun. Balance the butt on your other palm if you need to steady your aim. Squeeze the trigger lightly. You won't have to apply much pressure to get it to fire. I breathed slowly and watched the paper target flinch as if the bullets were cutting through flesh. Almost all of them hit outside the target range, and not a single one was inside the circle that represented the vital organs. Ironic, that.
The unused storeroom had good ventilation for an indoor locale, so Pritkin had set it up as a firing range. Daily practice was supposed to improve my aim—at least that was the theory. So far, the paper cutouts at the far end of the room hadn't had too much to worry about.
I released the empty clip and reloaded. The weapon felt the same as always in my hand; the weight, the smoky scent of the oil and powder, the almost-there smell of burnt paper, were all familiar after almost two weeks of this. When I'd picked the gun up today, that had seemed strange. Like killing a man yesterday should have changed it somehow, added weight, shown up on the sleek black surface like a mark. Something.
But it didn't.
Nine mm Beretta, clip holds fifteen rounds. Maximum effective range is fifty meters, but it's better close up. Remember to take the safety off and aim for the torso. Pritkin had been giving me pointers, determined, as he put it, to reduce my status as a giant bull's-eye in the field. And that's how I'd been thinking of the lessons: as something designed to help with defense. It had somehow never registered that defense with a gun usually meant shooting something more substantial than a paper target. That defense with a gun might mean killing.
I'd grown up around guns, had seen them so often that they were just a part of the scenery, no more remarkable than a vase or a lamp. I hadn't owned one myself, because I wasn't expected to fight. At Tony's, I'd been among the group of useful noncombatants whom other people were supposed to protect. I'd been told a hundred times that, if an attack ever came, my job was to get to one of the many bolt-holes secreted around the place and wait it out.
There had been a certain comfort in my old position that I'd never really appreciated until now. Because the simple truth was, the moment you took on a position of responsibility, there were people who would look up to you, who would expect you to shield them, who would expect you to save them. I was used to running away, was damn good at it in fact, or I wouldn't have lasted this long. I knew how to get fake IDs almost anywhere, how to change my appearance, how to blend in.
I didn't know how to keep people alive.
My clip was empty again, the little click, click telling me to reload. I pressed a button and missed the grab. The spent clip bumped against my shoe before spinning away on the floor. I retrieved it and manually reloaded with fifteen new bullets.
Despite the ache in my wrist, my hands were steady. I kept being surprised by that, kept expecting to fall apart. I'd washed up in front of the bathroom mirror after we got back, letting the washcloth linger on the back of my neck, cool and soothing, while I waited to dissolve. Only I hadn't yet. It was starting to really worry me.
Once when I was about six, Alphonse had come back from a job covered in blood, with a gash in his forehead that almost bisected the scalp, making him look like Frankenstein's monster before the doc stitched him up. But he'd been in a rare good mood, because the other guys, the ones he'd left lying in pieces all over a basketball court, had looked worse. They'd taken out a couple of our people in a territory dispute and, since the dead had been Alphonse's vamps, Tony had let him handle it. Alphonse had done his usual thorough job.
He'd seen me loitering around a corner, watching him with wide eyes, and had chucked me on the chin in passing. It had left a red mark on my skin, which Eugenie had scrubbed off later while inadvertently teaching me my first swear word. When I was older, I'd realized that he'd been making a point, coming back covered in blood to show that the insult had been properly avenged, but all I'd thought at the time was that it was strange to see him so relaxed. If it hadn't been for the gore, he could have been anybody returning from a good night's work.
It hadn't bothered him either.
I aimed at the target again, which was still looking pretty pristine despite the fact that the air was getting acrid. I thought of Mircea's face, his eyes reflecting fire, his body outlined in jumping, deadly flames. I wanted to touch him so badly that I could feel his fingers on my wrist, like a phantom ache. This was how reaching for something with a missing hand must feel, restless and empty and wrong. And I'd almost been left with it forever, thanks to a guy who thought that trying to electrocute someone was an acceptable way of saying hello.
The air rang with gunshots and the sound of ripping paper until the clicking noise came again. I reloaded, my eyes smarting from the smoke, wishing life was that easy. Just fill up what was empty, replace what was lost. But it wasn't. Some things couldn't be replaced. So you had to make sure you didn't lose them to begin with.
It was all the way past crazy and out the other side that I was starting to agree with Alphonse.
That afternoon, Françoise and I made our way to the imposing marble and glass edifice in the main arcade where Augustine had set up shop. My run-in with the dark mages had made one thing very clear: if Mircea hadn't been there, I'd have lasted all of about thirty seconds. If I had any hope of actually getting my hands on the Codex, I had to be better prepared. I just hoped Augustine could do what I had in mind.
Françoise had paused in front of the two large plate-glass windows that displayed selections from the ready-to-wear line. She eyed a slim flute of a dress with golden bubbles rising upwards from the hem, like champagne, but passed on without comment. Inside, a large chandelier took up most of the ceiling, its crystals formed by icicles charmed not to melt despite the candles scattered among its many tiers. Françoise immediately began browsing, although what she planned to use for money I had no idea. I'd offered to take her shopping, since she'd ended up here sans family, friends and wardrobe. But my bank account didn't run so much to pricey boutiques.
I decided to explain things if and when she found something, and walked past the staff into the small workroom in back. Nobody tried to stop me. I was back in Elvira mode, wearing a black wig and an official-looking name badge. I'd discovered that it avoided a lot of questions if I looked like an employee, although it wasn't doing my arches any good.
The workroom was so crowded with racks of garments and bolts of fabric that I couldn't even see Augustine, but I heard someone muttering in a far corner. It turned out to be the great man himself, wrestling with a piece of golden fur that appeared to be trying to eat him. He threw it off and slapped a chair down on it, then started digging in the pile of papers on a nearby desk and muttering more.