“How long could the boys stand staying there without going nuts?”

“Why?”

“I’m just asking you a question.”

“I know you too well by now. You never just ask a question. I’m not sending them away again.”

“You may have to.”

“Why?”

“Because the rape has to do with you.”

“What makes you so sure?” she said struggling to hold her emotions in check. “Maybe Cory did do it? I mean, it’s crazy otherwise, Peter. He and his friends murder Florence, then someone else tries to break into the mikvah to rape me?”

“It makes perfect sense if the guy happened to be hanging around, witnessed the murder, and took advantage of the fact that the guard was dead.”

“Who’d be hanging around?” Rina’s eyes widened. “Are we back on Moshe Feldman again?”

“I’m just looking at anyone who might-”

“Gevalt. He didn’t do it, Peter. He no more raped Sarah Libba than he killed Florence Marley. How can you possibly consider him a suspect and brush off Cory so easily? It seems to me you’re reaching. Why are you obsessing on Moshe?”

“I’m not obsessing. I’m trying to start from the beginning-”

“Are you afraid that this case will leave a blot on your perfect record?”

Decker lowered his head and gripped it hard.

“Oh Peter, I didn’t mean that.” She sighed. “I’m such a mess. And I’m taking out my frustrations on the person who’s trying to help me the most. I’m sorry.”

“It’s all right. We’re both a mess right now.” He took another swallow of Coke. “Rina, someone tried to break into the mikvah that night. And that someone was after you. Just like the first time.”

“Why do you say that? He could have gotten me if he wanted to. I would have come out a half hour later. All he had to do was wait.”

“The point is he thought Sarah Adler was you. The first time I interviewed you, you told me that you ran late that evening. Sarah left the mikvah at the time you usually leave. Do you remember saying that?”

“No, I don’t.”

“Well, you did. I have it in my notes.”

“Peter-”

“Listen. Sarah wore a black wig that could have easily been mistaken for your own hair. You told me she said the rapist went wild after he pulled off the wig. Of course he’d become unglued. At that point he realized that he had the wrong woman.

Rina said nothing. Tears started rolling down her cheeks. Memories flooded her head, dredging up past fears. Decker took her hand and brought it to his lips. They felt warm and soft. She let the kiss linger for a moment, then she pulled her hand away.

“Rina, think! Who could be after you? Anyone else besides the people we’ve discussed?”

She shook her head.

“It had to be someone who was on the grounds that night,” said Decker. “Someone who took advantage of Florence’s murder.”

He lit a cigarette.

“Which narrows the field of potential rapists down to all the men in the yeshiva,” he muttered.

“It’s not anyone from the yeshiva.”

“Fine. Have it your way. The fact is there’s still a rapist out to get you, and you’re still here. You’ve got to get away-”

“No,” she said defiantly. “We’ve already had this discussion.”

“Just hear me out, all right? I’ve been working with sex crimes for three years now, and I don’t say this to everyone. Sometimes rapes are random-the woman is in the wrong place at the wrong time-sometimes they’re not. This is one of the cases where there’s intentionality. The guy isn’t out to pound out his hatred on the first woman he sees. He’s out for you. You’re symbolic of something to the son of a bitch.”

“All the more reason I shouldn’t run away. If he’s out to get me, then he’ll follow me.”

“What about your kids?”

“Peter, where would I go? Back to my parents and involve them in this ordeal? In an apartment to live among anonymous strangers who don’t give a damn about me? At least here people know what’s going on. People look after me. You call me; Sarah calls me every night at eleven. Here people care. I can’t run away. If you really think I’m in danger, then I’ll learn how to protect myself.”

She touched his shoulder holster.

“Teach me how to use it.”

“Oh, that’s a great solution. Play Annie Oakley, and you’ll definitely wind up damaged.”

“That’s downright sexist.”

“I’d say the same thing if you were a man, only I’d use Wyatt Earp.”

She folded her arms across her chest.

“As I recall, you trusted me with your own weapon a while back.”

“Florence might have still been alive. I had to look for her. I had no choice but to give you a gun.”

“And I have a lot of choices now?”

“You have a good one. You can leave. You didn’t have that option the night of the Marley murder.”

“Well, I don’t think escaping is a viable option in this case.”

“A gun is no good unless you know how to use it.”

“So teach me.”

“I mean use it psychologically. I know you could learn how to shoot. But when you point a firearm at an assailant, you’d better be damn sure you’re willing to pull the trigger and blow the bastard away. Because if you don’t, he’s going to grab the gun and use it on you. Could you kill someone?”

“I kicked Cory when I had to.”

“Could you kill someone?”

“If he was attacking my kids-”

“Could you draw a gun and kill someone if he was attacking you?”

“If I felt threatened, I think I could do it.”

“You think?”

“Yes, then. Yes, I could.”

“I don’t believe it.”

“You don’t know me all that well.”

“Maybe I’ve just seen too many nice people wind up in the morgue because they thought they could do it, also.”

“I fought back with Cory, Peter. And it felt good. Not everybody fights back, either.”

“It’s not the same thing as pulling the trigger.”

“You’re the cop. You tell me you’re worried about me. Then you tell me not to fight back.”

“A gun is not the answer.”

“Well, neither is escaping.”

He touched his throbbing head, then took her hand again.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I’m not reckless, Peter. I called you the minute I thought something was amiss. And I’ll do the same thing if need be in the future. I’m not going to go after the rapist, but he’s not going to drive the boys and me away, either. If I’m attacked, I want to be able to take care of my kids and myself. I just know I could do it.”

She looked him in the eye.

“I could learn how to use a gun from someone else, you know.”

“I know.” Decker gave her a weak smile and looked inside the picnic bag. There was no sense pursuing the discussion.

25

The printer clicked rhythmically while spewing out a white stream of computer paper. When the machine finished its obbligato, Decker detached the printout from the remaining roll of blank paper and took the pile over to his desk.

He sat down, gulped lukewarm coffee, and stared at the columns in front of him, noticing that the print had become very light. It was the third ribbon he’d gone through in the last twenty-four hours. He squinted in an attempt to bring the words into sharper focus, but his eyes were too damn tired. Pushing aside stacks of papers, he rubbed them hard and stretched. His back and neck were stiff, his shoulders ached, and his head throbbed. Opening the desk drawer, he pulled out the aspirin bottle only to find it empty, and tossed it disgustedly in the trash.

Placing his hands behind his neck, he leaned back into the chair, propped his feet on the desk, and gazed upward, hoping that the ceiling would provide a burst of sudden insight. When nothing came, he figured it best to clear his mind and start over, get a fresh perspective. He rested a few more moments, enjoying the blank view, then sat back upright.

He studied the printout again. Hundreds of thousands of bytes of data had revealed nothing. He’d started with his original suspects and the M.O. of the crime. When nothing immediate panned out, he’d punched in the names of known local anti-Semites, then sex offenders now on parole, followed by yeshiva boys whom Rina had taught and men she’d gone to college with, throwing in people like a chef tossing in ingredients to revive a failed recipe. In the end he was no closer to the culprit. It boiled down to the same people. He picked up a pencil and scribbled the first name.