“If it was necessary. Yes. But it isn’t in this instance. I don’t need to lie because the truth serves me better. I want you and I always have. The case will be easier in some ways because of that, but harder in others.”

“Why harder?”

“When I’m with you, my libido tends to take over, but when I’m on a case, I need to have my brain engaged at all times. It worries me, but there’s not a hell of a lot I can do about it.”

“Really?”

“Really. I thought about talking to Whit about getting another agent to take your place, but frankly…with the way I feel about you right now, I don’t think I could successfully manufacture the relationship with another woman.” And he didn’t sound happy about it.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He smiled, the look so sexy, her insides were melting in little puddles. “I’m not.”

“How do you feel about me?”

“I just told you. I want you so much I’m ready to explode just thinking about sinking my cock inside you.”

That wasn’t what she meant, but the fact that he answered that way made it clear his interest in her was purely sexual. His emotions weren’t involved. “You can be incredibly crude.”

“Call it a gift. And blame yourself…I don’t get this basic with other women. Something in you brings it out.”

“The same something that brings out Alan’s protective instincts?” He’d certainly been overzealous in that department earlier.

“I don’t think so,” he said, as if the idea that he and Alan were affected by her in the same way was an anathema. “Though I feel a mite protective of you myself.”

“Do you?”

“Couldn’t you tell this morning?”

“No, I was too busy fantasizing about shooting your kneecap.”

“You would maim me for life for warning off your ex-fiancé?” he asked, askance.

“No, for embarrassing me.”

“You’re ashamed to be dating me?”

“Wanting to maintain a certain level of privacy in the workplace has nothing to do with being ashamed of who I’m dating, but we aren’t dating. Not really.”

“Last night sure felt like a date to me. It ended better than a lot of them do.”

“With me sending you home?” she couldn’t help teasing.

“With the image of the hungry look in your sweet brown eyes as you stared at my hard dick. And the date didn’t end there…did it?” As he’d been speaking, he’d been moving closer until she was against the wall and once again his body was just touching hers.

“No.” She licked her lips, while staring at his. “I guess not.”

He groaned. “Beth, baby, you are killing me again.”

“I don’t mean to.”

“Huh.” It was definitely a sound of disbelief. “So, do you acknowledge last night was a date?”

There was no hope denying it and she wasn’t sure she wanted to. “Vito certainly thought so.”

“He’s a flirt.”

“He’s a sweetheart.”

“He’s an Italian lothario who is going to lose his charming accent along with his voice if he doesn’t stop flirting with my woman.”

Ethan was playing his role again, but she couldn’t help the thrill of dark pleasure that raced down her spine at his words.

He nuzzled her neck, sending chills of pleasure down her spine. “So…you hungry?”

She let her head hit the wall as she leaned against it. “A little…”

It was a lie. She was starving…both for him and for the delicious food smells coming from the kitchen. The question was, which hunger was going to get to her first?

“If you’re only a little hungry, then maybe you’d be okay with dessert first.” His lips played along her jaw.

Oh, yes…dessert. Yum. “What’s for dessert?” she asked in a whisper that sounded a lot more come-hither than she’d intended.

He kissed the corner of her mouth, but not full on her lips. “What do you think?”

“I don’t know if I’m ready for that.” What was her sanity doing asserting itself now? Didn’t it know when to keep a low profile?

“Trust me, you are.”

She was…but she wasn’t. And the conflicting feelings only fed the overwhelming desire coursing through her. Shouldn’t her ambivalence at least give her a little respite? And yet despite how her body buzzed with electric need, her mind and fears would not shut off. Had she gotten so used to dreaming about life rather than living it, she’d lost the ability to just exist in the moment?

It was not a comfortable thought…but none of them were right now. “You said you wouldn’t push me.”

He cupped her face and leaned his forehead against hers while his body pressed closer. “I want you to the point of madness, Beth. And as fantastic as it was, I don’t want another session of lovemaking via the phone. I need the real thing. I think you do, too.”

Her body certainly agreed with him. It ached to press closer to his heat, but part of her was more than willing to try the phone sex thing again. It had been incredible. What if the real thing was a disappointment? Not that she was expecting it to be. She liked making love. A lot. It had been good with Alan and she thought it would probably be spectacular with Ethan. Would she survive it though?

“I’d never done that before. The phone sex thing,” she clarified as if he wouldn’t know just what she was talking about.

He nuzzled her. “I figured that. Neither had I.”

“N-never?” She shivered as his nuzzling affected her in ways she wished she could better control.

“No. Now that you’ve taken my virginity, do you feel obligated to marry me?” he asked in a deep voice that masked the humor she knew had to be lying under the surface.

But even knowing it was a joke, the words caused everything inside her to freeze in shock. “Uh…no.”

“Too bad, but maybe I can change your mind.”

“Don’t joke about that.”

“Why not? Are you worried your certainty I’d make a bad long-term prospect is in jeopardy?”

“No. You’re the one who said you were looking for sex without commitments.”

But that didn’t mean she wouldn’t end up wanting one. And that would be a disaster on so many levels, she didn’t even want to consider the possibility.

“More like sex without long-term commitments. I expect you to be very committed to me and only me while we’re having sex and vice versa of course.”

How could he talk so intelligently while she felt like her muscles and her will were turning to jelly? “I think maybe I should come back another night to do the get-to-know-you thing.”

He leaned back so their eyes met. His were assessing and hungry…very, very hungry. “What are you so afraid of, Beth?”

“You.”

He shook his head. “Don’t you know…you’ve got nothing to fear with me, darlin’? Nothing at all.”

He was wrong. She had no doubt he knew exactly how to give her more pleasure than she’d ever known. It wasn’t her body she was worried about. It was her heart, but she wasn’t about to admit her biggest fear was that she was falling in love with him. He knew too much about her desire for him already.

Besides hearts did not belong in discussions about sex without long-term commitments. Hearts and the feelings they held were very long term. She’d learned that with Alan. Walking away from him had hurt more than the humiliation of calling off the wedding. Way more. Only the certainty that a lifetime of the same was staring her down had given her the strength to end the relationship when he got home repentant and still wanting to marry her.

She hadn’t dated for the first year after the breakup simply because she’d still been hurting too much to risk her heart. Then she’d met Ethan and every other man had eventually faded into the background. If he had that kind of power over her when she didn’t love him, how much worse would it be if she did when he walked away?

Even more terrifying was the prospect that he might change his mind and not want to. She didn’t think she’d have the strength to do it herself.

“What is the matter, Beth? You look like you’re watching a horror movie and it’s reached the really gory part.”