"You also used a third-party intermediary."
Now Phoebe smiled, sweet Southern sugar. "Officer Meeks, it appears you have several questions and problems with this particular incident and my handling of it. I wonder if you'd be more satisfied if the subject had just jumped."
"Seeing as he was only sitting up four stories, he'd only have a couple broken bones if he had. Unless he shot you and himself beforehand."
"There's an interesting train of thought. Disbelieving a subject is serious about suicide, or could indeed cause his own death."
Casually, she reached up to secure a stray wisp of hair that had escaped from its pins. And kept her voice just as casual. "I was acquainted with a negotiator who had this train of thought over a jumper who was about twelve feet off the ground, unarmed. Mostly being a nuisance, from my acquaintance's point of view, one that was keeping him from doing more important things with his valuable time. And he allowed that opinion to show. The subject jumped, headfirst, crushing his skull on the sidewalk. He was very dead, Officer Meeks.
"Anybody know why this nuisance ended up with a toe tag?"
"Negotiator screwed it up," someone called out.
"That's right. The negotiator screwed it up by forgetting the prime directive: Preserve human life.
"If you have any more questions or comments about the incident, please feel free to write them up for me. But for right now? We're moving on."
"I'd like to-"
"Officer." The temper Phoebe rarely set free strained on the leash.
"You may be mistaken about who is running this session. I am. You may also be confused about the order of rank here. I am your superior."
"It seems to me, ma'am, that you don't want to address your questionable decisions during a crisis negotiation."
"It seems to me, boy, that you are unable to take no for an answer, by a woman who happens to outrank you, and that you're both rigid in your thinking and argumentative in attitude. These are very, very poor qualities in a negotiator. I'll so note to your captain, and hope that we'll be relieved of each other before much longer. Now, I want you to close your mouth and open your ears. That's an order, Officer Meeks. If you choose to ignore it, I'll write you up for insubordination here and now.
Clear?"
His face had gone an angry red, and his eyes spoke furious volumes. But he nodded curtly.
"That's fine. Now, tactics, teamwork and the negotiator's role."
The minute the session was over, Phoebe headed straight for the women's room. She didn't beat her head against the wall, though she considered it. Instead, she turned to the mirror, gripped the sink below it. "Arnold Meeks has a dick the size and width of a baby carrot, and his smirky, insulting, juvenile behavior is a pathetic attempt to compensate for his pinkie-sized weenie."
She nodded, relaxed her shoulders. Then dropped her head when she heard a toilet flush. How stupid could she be to mouth off to the mirror without checking the stalls first?
Phoebe knew the woman who stepped out, but that didn't negate the mortification. Detective Liz Alberta was a solid cop, a strong-willed brunette who worked in sex crimes.
"Lieutenant."
"Detective."
Liz ran water in the sink, turned her own face right and left as if checking her reflection. "Arnie Meeks is a fuckhead," she said casually. "Oh." Phoebe sighed. "Well."
"He tells tits-and-ass jokes in the break room. I like a good joke same as the rest, and boys will be boys and all that. But I took some exception, and made my exception known after he told me the majority of rapes are bogus, pulling out the old chestnut about how a woman can run faster with her skirt up than a man can with his pants down."
"The fuckhead said that?"
"Oh yes, he did. And I filed a complaint on him. He isn't a fan of mine." Liz fluffed at her short, dark hair. "And I dislike him right down to the tip of that teeny weenie of his." She offered a sunny smile as she dried her hands. "Lieutenant."
"Detective," Phoebe returned as Liz tossed the paper towel into the bin and strolled out.
She didn't like it, but she went to Dave. As was her habit, she jogged up the two flights of stairs from the lecture area to her own section. He was striding out of his office, swinging on his jacket as she popped out the stairway door.
"Oh, you're heading out."
"I've got a meeting. Problem?"
"Maybe. I'll come back."
He glanced at his watch. "I can give you two minutes." He jerked a thumb, stepped back into his office. And said nothing when Phoebe closed the door behind her.
He was still so much the same as the day she'd first met him. A little gray dashed his temples, and those lines people called character in a man and age in a woman fanned out from his eyes. But those eyes were still clear and blue and, for her, drenched in quiet wisdom.
"I don't like having to do this, because for one thing, it means I've failed. But I'm asking you to consider removing Officer Arnold Meeks from my training sessions."
"Because?"
"I can't teach him anything. And, in fact, may be prejudicing him against any of the basic tactics and guidelines in the field."
Dave leaned back against his desk, a gesture that told her she'd get more than the two minutes now if she needed them. "Is he stupid?"
"No, sir, but he is small-minded. In my opinion."
"His father's still on the job. He's a son of a bitch."
Phoebe relaxed fractionally. "I'm shocked and amazed to hear that."
"I want all officers assigned to the sessions to complete them. You can relate your opinions of Officer Meeks, in this area, in your evaluation.
I want all of them to get through it, Phoebe. You know as well as
I do that at least some of what you teach them will work its way in, even into small minds."
"I dressed him down in the session."
"Did he deserve it?"
"And then some. But he's only going to be pissed off at me now, and even less likely to listen."
"Minimize the damage and move on." He gave her a pat on the shoulder. "I'm going to be late."
"Minimize the damage," Phoebe muttered, but reached up to straighten Dave's tie.
He smiled at her. "You're the best I've ever worked with. You remember that, and handle small-minded Meeks."
"Yes, sir, Captain."
She walked out with him, and when she peeled off, spotted Arnie loitering with a couple other cops outside her squad room. Her belly might have clenched, but her face was serene as she walked up to him. "Officer Meeks, the captain wishes all assigned officers to complete the negotiator training. I'll expect to see you Monday morning, as scheduled. Is that understood?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"Now I'm sure the three of you have more important things to do than stand around here. Go on and do it."
"Yes, ma'am," he repeated, in a tone that had her hackles rising. Minimize the damage, she reminded herself. "I expect we can both learn something from these sessions."
She couldn't hear what he said when she walked away; the words were low and indistinguishable. But she heard the snickers clearly enough. She let it go. A woman who'd pushed through Quantico, who'd slogged through police training, through negotiation training, sexually outnumbered ten to one, had heard snickers before.
She also knew when eyes were trained on her ass, and while it might infuriate her, Phoebe reminded herself to pick her battles. And that she had a damn fine ass.
When she entered her office, saw the message from the mechanic, she understood she had bigger problems than a smart-mouthed cop and ass ogling.
Her car was going to cost seven hundred and fifty-nine nonnegotiable dollars.
"Ah, hell."
Giving up, Phoebe laid her head down on her desk for a moment of pure self-pity.