"I don't consider it wrong to steal from people I've never met, people I know but who don't know me, or people who know me but aren't willing to associate with me. But in the case of people I meet and greet every day, if I were to rob them, they'd never suspect me and I'd feel a bit ashamed when I saw them next. For instance, I invited you to join me for a drink just now. If you'd refused, you'd have shown yourself to be a snob who looked down on me and, no matter where you lived, I'd never have let you get away with it. But you were happy to come over and sit here opposite me. Someone as congenial as that-how could I bring myself to rob him?

"In the case of a rich man who has never been robbed despite all his wealth, I'll condescend to pay him a call, to hit him up for a contribution, as it were. What's wrong with that? But if I've robbed him once already and gotten my share, I'd have to be a monster of greed to go on plaguing him. So that, too, is something I won't do.

"But those timid souls who worry about thieves all day and guard against them all night, who never stop talking about thieves, they treat me without any respect, so I do the same with them. I rob them a couple of times and show them I'm smarter than they are and all too easy to underestimate, just so that they won't look down on us thieves anymore.

"But if it's a bighearted, generous man for whom money is just a matter of chance, anyway, the sort of man who will let you steal a little if you need it, either by neglecting to shut his gate or deliberately leaving his door open, if I stole from a man like that, I'd be a coward and a bully, a thieving rat or cur, as they say. It is not something that our great mentor, Robber Zhi, would ever have stooped to, so how can I do it? [40]

"Those are my Five Abstentions from Theft. All my life I've benefited from them. People far and wide know about these qualities of mine, and although they realize I'm a thief, they don't treat me as one and they take no precautions. Since they don't consider it a disgrace to associate with me, I don't consider it one either. If you have no objection, let's take an oath of brotherhood. Should you ever need my help, I'll do my level best to serve you, to the death if necessary. This is not one of those oaths of brotherhood you educated men swear, which amount to helping a brother in good times but begging off in bad. We thieves aren't like that."

As he listened to the other's speech, Vesperus had been nodding in rapid succession. Now he heaved a sigh.

I never expected to find such a hero among thieves, he mused. If I make friends with him, the one case in which I might need his help would be if I heard of some outstanding beauty-like the Girl in Red or Red Whisk-who was living in a great mansion where I mightn't be able to communicate with her, let alone meet her. [41] How marvelous if I could count on him to play the role of Kunlun! Perhaps meeting him today means that I have an exceptional destiny in store for me and Heaven has sent a supernatural being to help me achieve it.

At this prospect he began to jump for joy. But the Knave's suggestion that they swear an oath of brotherhood gave him pause. Although he replied, "Capital," his tone was less than enthusiastic.

The Knave guessed his thoughts. "You may say you agree, but in your heart you haven't quite agreed. You're not afraid, by any chance, that I'll involve you in a lawsuit? Forget for the moment that my exceptional skills will keep me out of the courts; even if I got into trouble, I'd go to my death if need be, rather than drag an innocent person down with me. So don't give it a second thought."

Now that the Knave had answered his reservations, Vesperus readily accepted, not daring to make any excuses. They contributed to a three-animal sacrifice and then, after writing out their dates of birth, smeared their mouths with blood and took an oath to live or die together. Since the Knave was older than Vesperus, they addressed each other as younger brother and elder brother, respectively. Then they enjoyed what was left of the sacrificial meats and ate and drank until midnight, by which time the table was littered with cups and dishes.

They were about to go to their rooms, when Vesperus said, "We'll be lonely sleeping in separate rooms. Why not come and share my bed and we'll pass the night in heart-to-heart talk?"

"Good idea," said the Knave, and they undressed and got into bed.

Vesperus had been so preoccupied with drinking and talking that he had quite forgotten the complaint that was normally on his lips. But now, with the drinking and talking over, as he got into bed and was about to drop off to sleep, he reverted to form. He came out with his grievance and repeated it several times.

"There are beautiful women everywhere," protested the Knave. "What makes you say that? Are you still unmarried, by any chance, and traveling about in search of a wife?"

"No, no, I already have a wife. But how can a man be expected to depend on just one woman for company all his life? After all, he needs a few women besides his wife just for the change of scenery! To be quite candid, brother, I have an exceptionally amorous nature. Wealth and honor are within my grasp, but they don't interest me at all. This is the one thing that matters. The journey I'm on is nominally to advance my studies but actually to look for women. I've been to many cities and towns, but all the women I've seen have either been larded with makeup to hide their dark complexions or covered in jewels to hide their brown hair. I've not met a single natural beauty, one who didn't need to adorn herself. I've lost heart, and that's why I say this all the time, to vent my frustration and despair."

"You're quite wrong there, brother. Good women never let themselves be seen, or rather, the only ones who do are not good women. Even among prostitutes, not to mention girls of good family, it is only the ugliest ones that nobody wants who will stand in doorways and try to sell you their wares. Those with any reputation at all sit inside and wait for the man to call on them, and even then they play hard to get and only come out after you've asked for them several times. You surely don't imagine that an unmarried girl of good family or a wife or concubine from a great household is going to stand in her doorway and display herself, do you? If you really want to know whether there are any good women about, you ought to come and ask me."

At this suggestion Vesperus's head jerked up involuntarily. "Now, that's a surprise! Since you don't take the stage yourself where love is concerned, how would you know anything about it?"

"I may not take the stage," said the Knave, "but I have a better view of the action than anyone else. Even the principals have only a general idea of what's going on. They're in no position to know all the details."

"Why is that?"

"Tell me, are beautiful girls more plentiful in rich and eminent households or in poor and humble ones?"

"Oh, in rich and eminent households, of course. Poor men can't afford them."

"Well, then, can you get a more accurate view of the beautiful girls in the rich and eminent households when they're fully dressed and made up or when they're undressed and have washed off all their makeup?"

"Of course, it's only after they've washed off their makeup that you see their natural beauty. When they're dressed and made up, how can you tell anything?"

"You see my point," said the Knave. "We thieves, of course, don't choose to go near the houses of the poor and humble. The houses we frequent are full of girls hung with jewels and dressed in the finest silks, and so naturally we get to see them in great numbers. Moreover, we time our visits, not for the daytime but for the dead of night, when they may be sitting undressed in the moonlight or else sleeping beside a lamp with the bedcurtains open. For fear the girl may not be asleep, I don't dare take anything at first, but hide in some dark corner with my eyes riveted on her body to make sure she's not stirring. Only when she's asleep do I set to work. Thus for the better part of an hour I have my eyes on her, and during that time nothing escapes me, not her eyes or face or figure or complexion, not even the depth of her vagina or the growth of her pubic hair. I have a mental record of which women are good-looking and which aren't in the houses of all the rich men and officials within a hundred miles of here. If you want to go in for this, you'll need my advice."