“I thought you held it together pretty well. They’re beautiful. I’ve admired them before.”
“Tom wanted to buy me a new wedding ring for our twenty-fifth. I wouldn’t have it.” Her eyes sparkled as she sipped. “So he gave me a diamond bracelet instead. I’ve got a weakness for diamonds. I’m surprised I haven’t seen you wear any, other than your spanking-new ring. Your grandmother had some fabulous jewelry.”
“My mother has it. And the kind of work I do?” Cilla shrugged, drank a little more wine. “Doesn’t lend to glitters.”
“You don’t need them with your looks. Neither did she. It’s us lesser mortals who require the enhancements. Of course, beauty fades if you live long enough. Hers didn’t. She didn’t.”
“I was just looking through some old photographs and thinking…” Cilla pressed a hand to her temple. “Sorry. I didn’t realize I was so tired. The wine must’ve topped it off.”
“You’ll need to drink the rest of that. And one more, I think, to finish the job.”
“I’d better not. I’m sorry, Cathy, but I feel a little off. I need to-”
“Finish your wine.” Cathy opened her purse, drew out a small revolver. “I insist,” she said as Spock began to grumble.
“JANET COMMITTED SUICIDE. I’ve regretted whatever part I might have played in that for more than thirty years.”
“She was pregnant.”
“She claimed…” Something in Ford’s eyes had Tom pausing, nodding. “Yes. I didn’t believe her, not until we spoke face-to-face. After, after she died, the day she died, in fact, I went to my father. Confessed everything. He was furious with me. He had no tolerance for mistakes, not when they affected the family name. He handled it. We never spoke of it again. I assume he paid off the medical examiner to omit the pregnancy.”
And his political career, Ford thought, had gone down the toilet.
“It was the only thing to do, Ford. Imagine what the public would’ve done to her if it had come out? Imagine what might have become of my family if I was named the father?”
“You spoke, face-to-face.”
“I went to the farm. I wanted her to leave it alone, to move on, but she persisted. So I went to see her, as she demanded. She’d been drinking. Not drunk, not yet, but she’d been drinking. She had the results of the pregnancy test.”
“She had them with her?” Ford prompted. “The paperwork.”
“Yes. She’d used her real name, went to a doctor who didn’t know her. Personally, that is. She said she’d worn a wig and used makeup. She often did when we’d meet somewhere. She knew how to hide when she wanted to. I believed her then, and I believed her when she told me she intended to have the baby. But she was done with me. I didn’t deserve her, or the child.”
Ford’s eyes narrowed. “She dumped you?”
“I’d already ended it. I suppose she wanted the last word on that. We argued; I won’t deny it. But she was alive when I left.”
“What happened to the doctor’s report?”
“I have no idea. I’m telling you, she was alive when I went home, and looked in on my daughter. I thought of all I’d risked, all I might have destroyed. I thought of Cathy, and the child she carried. How I’d nearly asked her for a divorce only months before so I could be, openly, with a woman who didn’t really exist. I might have done that. I nearly did that.”
He leaned heavily on the deck rail, closed his eyes. “It was Cathy telling me she was pregnant that helped me begin to break the spell. I lay down on the cot in the nursery with my daughter, thought of the baby Cathy would have in the fall. Thought of Cathy and our life together. I never saw Janet again. I never risked my family again. Thirty-five years, Ford. What would it accomplish to bring it out now?”
“You terrorized Cilla. You nearly killed a man, and when that wasn’t enough, you terrorized her. Breaking into her house, writing obscenities on her truck, her wall, threatening her.”
“I broke in. I admit that, too. To look for the letters. And I lost control when I couldn’t find them. It was the anger, the impulse that had me smashing the tiles. But the rest? I had nothing to do with it. It was Hennessy. I realized the letters didn’t matter. They didn’t matter. No one would connect me.”
“Hennessy couldn’t have done all the rest. He was locked up.”
“I’m telling you, it wasn’t me. Why would I lie about a stone wall, the dolls?” Tom demanded. “You know the worst of it.”
“Your wife knew. Janet called her. You said so in the letter, the last letter.”
“Janet was drunk, and raving. I convinced Cathy that it wasn’t true. That it was alcohol, pills and grief. She was upset, of course, but she believed me. She…”
“If you could live a lie this long, why couldn’t she? You claim you slept in the nursery the night Janet died.”
“Yes, I… I fell asleep. I woke when Cathy came in to get the baby. She looked so tired. I asked if she was all right. She said she was fine. We were all fine now.” In the moonlight, the flush of shame died to shock white. “My God.”
Ford didn’t wait for more reasons, more excuses. He ran. Cilla was alone. And Cathy Morrow knew it.
“YOU PUT SOMETHING IN THE WINE.”
“Seconal. Just like your whore of a grandmother. But it was vodka for her.”
Queasiness rose up to her throat. Fear, knowledge, the mix of drugs and wine. “The couch wasn’t pink; the dress wasn’t blue.”
“Drink some more wine, Cilla. You’re babbling now.”
“You saw the couch, the dress the night… the night you killed her. That’s what you remember-that night, not the Christmas party. Tom wrote the letters, is that it? Tom was her lover, the father of the child she carried.”
“He was my husband, and the father of my child, and the child I carried. Did she care about that?” Fury blasted across her face. Not madness, Cilla thought, not like Hennessy. Sheer burning fury.
“Did she give one thought to what marriage and family meant before she tried to take what was mine? She had everything. Everything. But it wasn’t enough. It never is for women like her. She was nearly ten years older than he was. She made a fool of me, and even that wasn’t enough. He went to her, left me to go to her that night while I rocked our daughter to sleep, while our baby kicked in my womb. He went to her, and to the bastard she made with him. Drink the wine, Cilla.”
“Did you hold a gun on her, too?”
“I didn’t have to. She’d been drinking already. I slipped the pills into her glass. My pills,” she added. “Ones I thought I needed when I first learned she had her hooks in him.”
“How long? How long did you know?”
“Months. He came home and I smelled her perfume. Soir de Paris. Her scent. I saw her in his eyes. I knew he went to her, again and again. And only touched me when I begged. But it changed, it started to change when I got pregnant. When I made sure I did. He was coming back to me. She wouldn’t allow it. Kept luring him back. I would not be pitied. I would not see myself compared to her and laughed at.
“I’ll shoot you if you don’t drink. They’ll call it another break-in. A tragic one this time.” She reached back into her purse, pulled out the large plastic bag, and the doll trapped inside it. “In case you’d rather go with the bullet, I’ll leave this behind. I bought several of them years ago. I couldn’t resist. I never knew why until you came here.”
Struggling against the dizziness, Cilla lifted the glass, wet her lips. “You staged her suicide.”
“She made it easy. She invited me in, like an old friend. Apologized for what she’d done. She was sorry she’d hurt me, or caused me any pain. She couldn’t undo it, wouldn’t if she could. Because that would undo the baby. All she wanted now was the baby and a chance to make up for past mistakes. Of course, she’d never reveal the name of the father. Lying bitch.”
“You drugged her.”
“When she started to slide, I helped her upstairs. I felt so strong then. I nearly had to carry her, but I was strong. I undressed her. I wanted her naked, exposed. And I gave her more pills, gave her more vodka. And I sat and I watched her die. I sat and I watched until she stopped breathing. Then I left.